Why are we so afraid of loneliness? Psychologist's blog

Autophobia - fear of loneliness - is quite common among people of different ages, genders and social status. The object of a phobia is the individual's fear of being alone. Fear manifests itself in the fact that a person is afraid of breaking relationships with people close to him, friends or a partner, and tries in every possible way to maintain these relationships, even if they are destructive for him. Also, the fear of an autophobe can take severe forms, to the point that he cannot be alone with himself in principle, and cannot stand a single minute in isolation from other people. He can’t sleep, eat, etc. alone.

Autophobia, or fear of loneliness, also has other names: monophobia, isolophobia. This phobic disorder is quite severe, since the autophobe is physically unable to ensure the presence of other people nearby at any moment. Breaks in relationships with partners, friends, and disagreements with loved ones are also inevitable. In addition to the severe course of the disease, it is often complicated by deep depression and suicidal tendencies. It is people prone to autophobia who most often commit suicide. That is why it is so important to contact a specialist in a timely manner and prescribe comprehensive treatment. By doing this on time, you will save the life of yourself or your loved ones.

Causes of autophobia and prerequisites

The causes of autophobia can be different. In some cases, it is provoked by completely understandable factors - childhood trauma, mental characteristics, unpleasant, tragic events in life. In other cases, atypical stressors and situations become prerequisites.

The development of autophobia in childhood is most common. After all, how often do we hear the following from parents: “If you cry, I’ll leave you here alone/ I’ll give you to an orphanage/ I’ll give you to someone else’s uncle.” Such words really help prevent hysterics. But parents forget that the child is not yet able to distinguish words spoken seriously from a joke or an imaginary threat. He naively takes everything on faith. His fear that his parents will abandon him is really great, it is real. That's why he stops crying, experiencing deep fear and intense anxiety. It is in childhood that the fear of being abandoned is most often formed.

In an adult, such fear can form after a tragic break in relationships with loved ones, a partner, or after the death of someone in the family or friends.

It is not always possible to identify the true cause of the fear of loneliness. However, psychologists identify a number of the most common reasons that provoke the development of an anxiety disorder. Among them:

• Lack of parental attention: father and mother are constantly at work, the child is often left alone at home. Parents do not respond to the child’s crying or his requests to be with him.
• At the first stages of a baby’s life, parents did not raise him, did not develop personal qualities, and did not take into account the characteristics of the child’s psyche.
• The child was punished with loneliness: they locked him in an isolated room, they threatened to leave him alone on the street, in a hospital, in a store, or to send him to an orphanage.
• Communication with peers from disadvantaged families.
• Experiences during puberty, lack of understanding and support from parents or peers.
• Growing up, a person begins to fear that he will not be able to start his own family or have children.
• Excessive gullibility and naivety as character traits: some individuals easily become attached to unreliable, unworthy people.
• Departure of a partner or divorce from wife/husband, death of a relative, close friends.
• Low self-esteem, shyness, lack of communication.
• Failures in your personal life: betrayal or unexpected departure of your partner.
• Memories of past trauma associated with being alone.
• Constant workload at work, in everyday life and, as a result, a lack of informal communication with people.

There is not always only one reason: as a rule, in each patient, autophobia can be provoked by a whole complex of preconditions. In some cases, it is quite difficult to establish the exact cause of the disease.

Symptoms of autophobia

The course of this disease can be either obvious or hidden, without pronounced symptoms. Also, the person himself often attributes the symptoms of autophobia to bad luck, incorrect upbringing, and his personal shortcomings. Sometimes they are also typical for people who do not suffer from phobias, but simply for people who are insecure, always busy with work, residents of megacities, people in adolescence.

So, let's look at the most common symptoms.

1. Low self-esteem.

Lack of self-confidence, self-criticism, doubts about the correctness of one’s actions and decisions. Eternal search for approval from the outside.

1. An urgent need for communication.

A person begins to overly strive for communication, expects understanding and constant interest in his person from others, and becomes obsessive. This significantly alienates the interlocutor and aggravates the fear of loneliness.

1. The desire to keep a partner by any means.

Autophobes have a hard time letting go of relationships that are unproductive and destructive to them. Completely erasing personal boundaries, making any concessions, sacrificing everything, the autophobe tries to keep the person close to him just so as not to be left alone. If attempts fail, he may resort to blackmail and threaten suicide.

1. Panic attacks.

Panic attacks are a typical companion to any phobic disorder. If they occur only during the period when a person is left alone with himself, we can talk about the presence of autophobia. The simplest incident can trigger an attack: a loved one does not answer calls or SMS for a long time, does not go online, or disappears for a while.

1. A person needs constant confirmation of his importance.

An autophobe lacks the simple presence of close people nearby. He needs constant proof that he is needed, loved, in demand. He expects warm words, confessions, gifts, heroic and beautiful deeds for his sake. And if this doesn’t happen, he gets angry and feels unnecessary.

1. Promiscuity in partners.

A typical autophobe does everything possible to avoid loneliness. He does not wait for his man, does not choose from possible options, but grabs onto the first person he meets. He compromises with himself: “Even if my partner is not the one I would like to see next to me. But now I am not in danger of loneliness.” But the problem is that such a compromise is obviously a failure. Sooner or later, the partner’s shortcomings and his failure to meet the autophobe’s requirements outweigh the fear of loneliness. And the autophobe himself breaks off relations with him, easily switching to a new person. At the same time, he repeats the mistake of not paying due attention to an objective assessment of his new partner. Sometimes an autophobe even marries an unsuitable partner just out of fear of being left alone and not having children of his own. He does not think about the fact that such a marriage is initially doomed to divorce.

Concentration is another strength of a lonely person

They can be workaholics or very successful people because they have the right values ​​and are difficult to lead astray. And goals, objectives and aspirations are polished in the process of constant loneliness and the same permanent reflection.

Since time is a resource, and a person is his own master, then he learns to manage it correctly. Where necessary, the loner tenses, and where necessary, he relaxes. He does not allow stress to overwhelm him in a stalemate, because he understands that a solution cannot be found if he does not distance himself from what is happening. Therefore, such people skillfully alternate periods of work and rest.

Treatment of autophobia

Autophobia can be successfully treated. With the right approach, you can completely get rid of it and start a happy and fulfilling life without phobias. How to get rid of autophobia? Self-medication in this case is highly not recommended. The only non-medical measures that can be taken is to enlist the support of family and friends. The main treatment for autophobia should be carried out by a qualified psychologist or psychiatrist. Also, the following few recommendations will help get rid of autophobia in its initial stages and partially relieve the anxiety state.

1. Loneliness is the norm. If you are afraid of being alone, you need to switch to this setting. It is physically impossible to be with someone 24 hours a day. It's important to be independent.
2. Take your mind off heavy thoughts with the help of your favorite activity, self-realization. Find a hobby you like, do important things that you have been putting off until later.
3. See a therapist regularly. Consultations with a specialist will stop the development of the disorder and help effectively relieve it.
4. Don't let the daily routine completely consume you, leave time for yourself. From time to time, arrange shopping for yourself, going out with friends to restaurants, cinemas. Meet a person you haven’t seen for a long time, go to nature, sign up for fitness or handicraft courses. In short, there should be room for bright and interesting events in your life.

How to deal with autophobia using psychological work? The work of a psychologist is, first of all, based on identifying and eliminating the causes of phobia. You can get rid of autophobia with the help of hypnosis: effective hypnotechniques allow you to introduce positive attitudes into the subconscious. The patient ceases to perceive loneliness as a terrible, tragic phenomenon and begins to treat it calmly.

Group work on a phobia is also quite effective. Autophobes, under the guidance of a psychotherapist, carry out collective work on their fears, in a group they simulate stressful situations and learn to cope with them. Such activities allow patients to feel like complete and independent individuals.

In severe, advanced cases, medications are used to treat autophobia. They are necessary to relieve acute somatic symptoms and to maintain a stable emotional background in the patient. Thus, patients suffering from anxiety disorders are prescribed SSRI antidepressants, sedatives, psychostimulants, and antipsychotics.

The main thing is to ask for help in time and not to let things take their course. After undergoing comprehensive treatment, you can completely get rid of autophobia, improve your physical health, and stabilize your mental state. The quality of life in general will also improve, especially in the professional and personal spheres.

We hope that this article helped you learn more about the fear of loneliness. In it, we tried to give a brief but succinct description of the disease itself, its symptoms, and also shared useful practical recommendations with readers. Anyone can easily do them, and regularly following these tips will help significantly reduce anxiety. We help many people deal with their fears and daily stress. We will be glad if you join us by sharing this post on social networks. You can also leave your opinions and reviews in the comments below.

What other phobias are most common:

Social phobia is a fear of society and social activities.

Ergophobia – fear of professional activity, work.

Gerontophobia is a dislike of older people, old people.

– fear of dirt, unsterility.

Erythrophobia is the fear of blushing from shame in an awkward moment in front of another person.

I’ll ask on the other hand: aren’t you afraid to spend your whole life together with an unloved person? “We while away the long nights, unloved with unloved” - you can’t erase the words from the song.

Worries about how to stop being afraid of being alone most often arise after not the first separation and after a divorce. Women are ready to stay close to disliked partners with whom they would have separated long ago, if they were sure that there would be no threat of loneliness in the future and that new relationships would work out well. In the meantime... they endure, remain silent, cry secretly from their husband or boyfriend, in the hope that he will definitely change for the better... Although, in fact, it’s not about men!

The fear of being alone is always not groundless. Surely earlier in life there were similar cases where you were left alone: ​​you had to be alone for a long time at home, in kindergarten, perhaps you were accidentally lost on the street, in a store, or you forgot to pick you up from school on time. There may be similar examples. What comes to your mind?.. Or, being alone, some kind of trouble happened to you: a stranger offended you, insulted you, something was stolen, you were disgraced... there are many cases.

Try to answer the questions below, the first thing you think of, indiscriminately:

• – what does your fear of being alone look like? (what color, size, weight, what does it look like) Where is it located and how old is it (a month, a year, several years)?
• – what thoughts haunt you when you think you’ll be alone? They often begin with the words “what if...!”
• – what can happen to any person if he is left alone? List all possible options.
• – which of your relatives, acquaintances, colleagues, friends are left alone? Write everyone down and how their lives turned out?
• – what will happen to you if you are left alone? What consequences scare you the most?

How to overcome it yourself

There is an opinion that it is almost impossible to overcome monophobia without professional help. But if you take it seriously and follow our recommendations, you can overcome this mental disorder.

Celebrate the benefits of solitude

Unfortunately, now loneliness is not appreciated properly. Moreover, many consider this shameful and label such people as outcasts. This is due to information development, as a result of which for many the number of achievements has become directly proportional to the number of invitations to a party and activity on social networks.

Think about the benefits you get from being alone. You can spend this time for self-development. For example, you can read more or take advanced training courses. Also, being alone, you can learn a new profession. Loneliness is a great chance to analyze your life and get to know your inner world more deeply.

Keep your anxiety under control

If you periodically experience anxiety during moments of loneliness, try to cope with it through relaxation. This could be muscle relaxation, yoga, or even self-hypnosis if you are good at self-hypnosis. For many, the best way to relax is to listen to your favorite music.

Focus on internal resources

Often, the feeling of loneliness goes away when the sick person begins to be sincerely interested in the problems and experiences of others. This does not mean that you need to look for a source of material or spiritual resources in your loved ones. On the contrary, help them fulfill their needs and make their desires come true.

For example, you can sign up to volunteer at an orphanage or a center for the mentally ill. In other words, you must become a source of happiness for others. Over time, you will feel that more and more people want to be around you. After this, the fear of loneliness will no longer bother you.

The most important state you must reach in order to overcome autophobia is to begin to appreciate the time spent alone. Learn to manage your time effectively, occupy it with something truly useful and interesting. Help your loved ones deal with their worries, and in return they will give you attention.

How not to be afraid of being alone?

Here, most likely, the reason for the fear is not in the threatening loneliness... but in the personal qualities of the woman. On a scale of ten, how would you rate your confidence, perseverance, self-belief, and desire to achieve something?

There is a well-known proverb: “a bad travel companion.” Do you know why? One of the main reasons is that a person driven by fears is secretly looking for a protector! Dreams of meeting someone who will protect you from troubles, solve them without your participation, protect you from grief and trouble. Did it resonate inside you, skip a beat?.. Let’s say a defender appears near you. It turns out that some kind of failures, difficulties, incidents must constantly happen around. Otherwise, from what or from whom will he protect you?! Think...

On the other hand, fear is a great advisor! He tells you in which direction to deal with yourself. How to stop being afraid of being alone? If your fear is “I won’t be able to provide for myself financially,” then there is a good opportunity to think and work through your problems with money and the ability to earn money. If “who will need me and who will look at me like this?” - a chance to deal with complexes, accept your appearance as it is, and finally understand that it’s not about her at all...

And most importantly.

Think about what a new relationship with a man will be like if it starts out of fear?

For example, when a person is afraid of drowning, he grabs onto everything that floats past...

How to stop being afraid of being alone? Who said that we need to stop?.. Close your eyes. Feel your fear, increase it 10, 100 times. Let it be, and accept the fact that you are afraid. Yes. Accepting anything and anyone is the first step in solving any problem.

Ask yourself:

• – Do I want to be in this state for another year or more, forever?
• – what benefits and advantages does the fear of being alone give me?
• – what do my fears tell me?
• – Do I have a desire to change in order to get rid of anxiety? Or let everything go as before, without changes?.. The more revelation in recognition, the better for you.

Don't look for salvation in someone, look in yourself.

I assure you, when you strengthen your inner qualities, solid psychological ground will appear under your feet, your appearance will improve by itself, and instead of worrying about “how to stop being nervous?”, “how to stop worrying?” the desire for self-development and improvement of oneself and one’s abilities will come. What kind of man do you think you will attract in this case? Being confident.

One thing I can say for sure is that while you were reading this article, your fear of being alone became less.) You are in the right place and at the right time if you are reading these lines. This means that we understand that it’s time to change something, to do something about our experiences. Then let's get to work!

Every individual has experienced the fear of loneliness at least once in their life. Many people understand that loneliness is not a death sentence, and much depends on themselves if there is a desire to change the situation. For example, to find friends or your loved one who will brighten up your everyday life and share your days with joy. At the same time, this fear can fetter the will of even the most sociable individuals, surrounded by a significant number of people. And then the individual has thoughts that something needs to be done about it. But what?

Fear of loneliness is one of the most common and severe phobias in our time, which entails a number of problems, including psycho-emotional addictions, psychosomatic diseases, etc. Often the fear of loneliness pushes a person to a place where he never wanted to be.

This fear is a big problem both for residents of modern megacities and small towns. It’s paradoxical, but residents of multi-storey buildings most often feel like real Robinson Crusoe, despite the fact that they have access to TV and the Internet, and every day in transport or on the streets they come into contact with a large number of people. Why is this happening? This is all due to the loss of emotional contact with other individuals, as well as distance from each other (close relatives, friends, colleagues). It is generally accepted in society that women experience the fear of loneliness much more often than men. This is not always the case, since men prefer not to talk about their fears out of a desire to preserve their masculinity.

Pathological fear of loneliness refers to a form of mental disorder called autophobia. A person suffering from this phobia is afraid to be alone with himself, experiences discomfort and an unpleasant feeling that no one needs him. This type of fear includes the fear of celibacy, when individuals fear that they will not be able to get married.

Reasons for fear of loneliness

Like most other fears, the causes of this phobia are hidden deep in a person’s subconscious and are hidden from him, so it is very difficult to get rid of this fear, since without understanding the reasons, it is impossible to solve this problem.

Often the reasons for the fear of loneliness lie deep in childhood. Children who lack attention and those who are subject to excessive demands, when left alone, begin to experience fear. This feeling intensifies with age and manifests itself more often. At the heart of this fear is the fear of responsibility.

Symptoms of fear of loneliness include the following: a person cannot be alone with himself, experiences inner restlessness, discomfort, boredom, tries to find something to do all the time, but is not able to concentrate on it.

Fear of loneliness can also develop completely unexpectedly after the sudden loss of a loved one. In such situations, this disorder arises, increased anxiety and panic attacks develop.

Psychologists attribute this phobia to the individual’s return to an early stage of development, and in some cases, the fear of loneliness is based on the fear of the unknown and the future, as well as the fear of old age. It is the elderly, lonely people who have no friends, family or acquaintances who are afraid to spend the rest of their lives alone. The next reason for this phobia may be the crazy pace of life in a big city, lack of time and constant busyness. And as soon as life becomes calmer, a person begins to experience discomfort: it is difficult for him to be alone, an obsessive fear of his own uselessness arises, it begins to seem to him that everyone has forgotten about him. For this reason, if a person loses a friend, spouse or spouse, then he tries not to be alone, but to immediately find someone. In severe cases, there are attempts when a person, on the basis of the fact that he is lonely and no one needs him, comes to the decision to die.

Intuition is the strong point of lonely people

Naturally, if a person has a habit of concentration, then it is almost inevitable that he will develop intuition. Lonely people can sense the mood of others. Whether we are talking about grief, despair or all-consuming joy. Lonely people tend to see, first of all, the bright side of a situation and find solutions to difficulties. But this habit is developed not at all because loneliness is such a fun state, but precisely because it trains a person’s love of life. When a person is alone, he inevitably learns to process negative feelings caused by various life circumstances. After all, a lonely person has only one support - himself. Therefore, he should not lose heart.

How to get rid of the fear of loneliness

The feeling of loneliness is an obligatory and integral part of human life. There is not a single individual in the world who is not familiar with this sensation. No matter how much a person wants, he will not be able to completely avoid loneliness, not in the present or in the future.

A deeper understanding of the individual’s psyche, or rather, into his subconscious, where phobias are formed, will help overcome the fear of loneliness. The feeling of loneliness is a reflection of a person’s inner state. The less a person is able to realize personal desires in emotional contact with other individuals, the more lonely he feels. And, conversely, if a person can connect emotionally with other people, experience compassion, love, the less he suffers from this phobia.

An individual who truly loves and is able to give love, and not just accept this feeling, never experiences this phobia. An effective way to get rid of this fear is to go out and communicate with people, including their understanding, empathy and sympathy. Therefore, an excellent preventive effect for a person against this phobia is to understand the psyche of another individual, as well as penetrate into his state of mind.

Only by opening up to the world and entering into an emotional connection with other individuals, revealing for himself the inner world of other individuals, does a person begin to attract new individuals who will happily begin to communicate with him. Today there are a huge number of people everywhere and there are also many ways to contact them. Internet technologies make it possible to communicate with anyone, without even leaving home. Each individual, regardless of education, age, place of residence, can have many acquaintances around the world. To do this, you just need to change yourself and tune in to emotional contact with people.

Fear of loneliness in women. Often the reason for loneliness in women lies in the fact that in her youth the representative of the fair sex had concerns about her appearance, since she repeatedly heard ridicule about herself, as a result of which an inferiority complex developed. Then she could no longer sensibly evaluate her appearance and became an insecure person, which directly contributed to securing her status as a lonely lady, since the girl almost never allowed young people to approach her. Often the reasons for loneliness also lie in the overestimation of one’s beauty. In such cases, the girl simply does not allow members of the opposite sex to approach her because they are not worthy of her. Often such a lady is graceful and arrogant; she always does not notice the fans hovering near her. Constantly “sorting through” young people, she eventually remains alone, but deep down in her soul she wants to get rid of the oppressive state of loneliness.

For relief, various methods of relaxation are recommended, and sedatives are prescribed by psychotherapists. Deliberately created situations in which a person remains for some time on his own are effective. Thus, a woman has the opportunity to independently overcome the fear of loneliness and cope with panic.

The fear of loneliness can make life very difficult, but if you cooperate with a psychologist, you can get rid of the condition that interferes with your life.

This phobia is called autophobia

, and it is one of the most serious phobias; it is difficult to psychocorrect; a psychotherapist can spend a lot of time consolidating the positive results.

A person is panicky, on an animal level, afraid to remain on his own. Of course, in modern society, when families are small and everyone goes to work, this is not normal and can result in serious neurosis. Or even worse.

Fear of loneliness is a very common disease nowadays and is called Autophobia, sometimes called Monophobia or Isolophobia. This disease manifests itself acutely in big cities and often affects teenagers and people who lack self-confidence.

This disease is called Autophobia, sometimes they show films about people who have Autophobia, and a person can get rid of his disease throughout his life if he is helped by a psychologist and loved ones. And in some cases, this can end tragically if the sick person feels lonely.

The fear of loneliness is called autophobia. It manifests itself in the fact that a person cannot remain alone, with himself. At such moments he feels anxiety, even to the point of panic attacks. In the modern world, this is a common occurrence, because people are accustomed from birth to constantly being surrounded by continuous communication: telephones, the Internet. Simply being alone with oneself began to frighten a person.

autophobia, a lot of people live with this phobia, it probably helps people find each other, because if they were comfortable alone, they would not look for each other and, accordingly, would not create families, the life chain however

Autophobia is the name given to the fear of loneliness. In my opinion, in our modern world, a very large number of people, so to speak, are afraid of this, afraid of loneliness. I’m afraid of getting this diagnosis. I wonder what it will be called).

The fear of loneliness is called autophobia. Unfortunately, this fear does not lead people to anything good. Because of autophobia, people decide to connect their lives with the wrong people, and subsequently live an unhappy life.

Deep understanding of yourself

Lonely people know themselves well, and this helps them understand others better. Maybe even single people understand their interlocutors better than they do themselves. Most people are not inclined to analyze their feelings, emotions and think through their thoughts to the end. Who knows why, maybe because there is no time, or maybe because there is no habit. For loners, their entire lifestyle is based on reflection, so they include feelings, emotions, and thoughts in their experiences. And during periods of crisis, it is easier for them to survive mental storms: their self-awareness is more developed. A person’s psychology develops when he takes time for himself.

What is the fear of loneliness called?

Autophobia is a pathological fear of loneliness. It usually manifests itself as a feeling of fear, spiritual emptiness, inner restlessness, boredom, and dissatisfaction with literally everything.

Currently, a lot of people suffer from this strange disease - autophobia, especially young people. Sometimes this even leads to suicide.

The pathological state of autophobia can manifest itself quite suddenly, for example, when a person loses someone close and very dear. This can be not only a relative, but also a friend.

The fear of loneliness is called Autophobia

A person is simply terrified of being alone

And is constantly looking for some company

Even if a person is alone in a room, he is still afraid

This is such a very unpleasant phobia

According to WHO statistics, about 7% of people of different ages have some kind of phobia, some of them are afraid to stay at home alone. Psychologists advise such people not to let their imagination run wild, but to stop fear at the beginning. For example, if you hear an alarming sound, don’t be too lazy to see what it is. Or check the locks and alarms before going to bed so as not to be afraid that thieves will break into the house. It is also not recommended to watch scary programs and thrillers, and avoid conversations on “slippery” topics.

If panic attacks occur, you should consult a doctor and undergo an examination. Often, such symptoms mean vascular pathologies, dystonia, heart rhythm disturbances, or problems with the organs of vision and hearing. If everything is fine with somatics, then the reason may be neurosis or psychosis.

Such features of the subconscious as irrational fears have been preserved with us since ancient times. They stem from ignorance of the world order. Man has always been frightened by many things that were inexplicable at that time (darkness at night, lightning, thunder, illness, etc.). According to one of the existing theories, these primitive phobias lie dormant in the subconscious for a certain time and wake up when a person is weakened by an illness, is very frightened, or experiences fatigue or stress.

It's important not to let anxiety get the better of you. Fears are useful because they are designed to protect us from dangers. They are a reflection of our nature. You just need to know how to work with them.

The best is its disclosure. This is done like this: you can walk around the apartment to make sure there are no people, turn on the lights and music, imitate ease and fun, or talk with an imaginary interlocutor.

Breathing exercises are very relaxing: inhale and exhale deeply through your nose three times, while inhaling, inflate your stomach without raising your chest and shoulders. After every three inhalations and exhalations, you should change your body position. This will help you relax. To avoid feeling lonely and helpless, you can walk around the apartment and talk to someone on the phone.

How to overcome the fear of being alone at home: advice from psychologists

A cozy atmosphere, light walls and bright light, when all corners remain illuminated, give a feeling of peace and security. Also, people who have experienced it advise leaving the TV or radio on to create the illusion of the presence of others.

Get a pet

Some people believe that animals, such as dogs and cats, will immediately sense danger if a stranger appears in the house. They have excellent hearing and sense of smell, thanks to which they can warn the owner. In addition, the presence of “smaller brothers” will brighten up loneliness and give a feeling of security.

Use protection methods

Precautionary measures should be taken at the first feeling of discomfort. Even if the actions make little sense, but they calm you down, you need to take them. So, some people put scissors under their pillow to protect themselves from dark forces. In England, scissors under the pillow are believed to get rid of difficult dreams. People who are far from superstitious simply check that the door locks and windows are closed at night. A feeling of security can be given by installing alarms and sensor lights.

Find something fun to do

Many people, when they are left alone at home, use their free time to engage in creativity. In general, any household activity (washing, ironing, cooking) will distract you from anxious thoughts. To relieve tension and avoid a panic attack, you can turn on dynamic music. Reading books and watching movies is also a great way to relieve fear.

There are other effective methods of dealing with panic attacks, such as meditation:

Respect for your own and other people's time

Singles value time. They believe that using it correctly can ultimately bring success in life. These people, as a rule, try to do everything to be on time. But they value not only their own, but also other people’s time. It is also pleasantly surprising how high-quality a single person’s friendship can be if a person joins the circle of the chosen ones. Just don’t count on meeting too often.

What to do if you are afraid of being alone at home?

Psychologists offer an effective method of working with panic attacks. It includes 4 steps:

1. We prevent the situation from getting worse. We take precautions: we walk around the apartment, verify the origin of extraneous sounds, etc. We carry out manipulations that help you feel safe.
2. Let's specify the fear (find out what exactly you are afraid of).
3. We work with fear outside of a frightening situation.
4. Letting go of fear during an anxiety attack.

If your loved ones are not yet aware of what is happening to you, then you need to tell them about it and ask them to always let you know if they plan to be late, to call when they are late. This will help keep your imagination from running wild if someone is unexpectedly late and will allow you to maintain your composure.

"Watching a movie" method

In order to completely overcome your phobia, you need to understand what exactly you are really afraid of. A simple technique for concretizing fear is to watch an imaginary movie. To do this, you need to sit down in a calm atmosphere, close your eyes and imagine that you are left at home alone, and your relatives are delayed. Then you need to allow yourself to watch the imaginary film to the end and see how events develop. Imagine the worst case scenario. This will be your main fear.

Sometimes people don’t process the situation to the end in their imagination, so they don’t realize what exactly scares them. They become afraid to go that far, so they avoid frightening thoughts and “hide” from them. But in order to overcome a phobia, you need to find the strength and courage to “look it in the face.” The simplest solution is to scroll through an imaginary situation to the end.

Usually, there are only two negative outcomes:

1. Something terrible will happen to relatives outside the house.
2. Something terrible will happen to you in their absence.

These situations require a different psychological approach. But there are exercises that will be useful in both cases, for example, the “Drawing of Fear” or “Helping a Friend” technique. Hypnotherapist Nikita Valerievich Baturin conducts individual sessions that will help identify fears and effectively overcome them. The specialist is armed with proprietary methods and developments that have proven high efficiency.

Technique “Drawing of Fear”

To work with a phobia you will need a white sheet of paper, paints or colored pencils. Imagine and draw your fear of being alone at home. It could be anything that is associated with a scary situation.

When the drawing is finished, you need to carefully examine it and think:

1. Is this fear good or not?
2. How do you feel about him?
3. Is it good for you or not?

You need to make friends with a useful fear, thank it for its concern and ask, looking at the drawing, that it decreases or completely goes away when you are left at home alone. We need to explain to him that he is in the way and must leave. In situations where you are alone at home, you can talk to him again while looking at a piece of paper and the fear will begin to decrease.

There is no need to talk to destructive fear. Imagine how you would like to get rid of it forever? Maybe you want to tear up the drawing, cross it out, burn it, or make an airplane and fly it into the wind? When you drew it, it moved from your thoughts to a piece of paper. Now you will do whatever you want with him and let him go forever.

Exercise “Helping a Friend”

The next time you find yourself at home alone, you can try this: Imagine that your friend is in a similar situation and he, and not you, has a fear of being alone at home (you can choose a real person or a soft toy for this). You can take a photo or object and place it next to you to “talk” to it.

Psychologists have noted the fact that it is easier for us to support another person in a difficult situation, because at this time we are outside the frightening situation and can think calmly and rationally. Your mission is to help your friend calm down and cheer up. Find the right words to relieve his stress and make strong arguments that the situation is safe for him. Reassure your friend in any way possible: hugs, pats on the shoulder, a gentle tone of voice, listening to music and watching movies. It's not difficult, you can do it.

If you can’t overcome phobias on your own, seek help from a specialist. Now anxiety disorders are successfully treated with cognitive behavioral psychotherapy.