Hysterics after nap. How to deal with hysteria in a child after nap Hysteria in a child after nap

Today we will talk about the worst nightmare of any parent - when a child wakes up at night with a hysteria, and there is no way to calm him down. To many, this situation does not seem supernatural - it happens that babies wake up at night crying, but then continue to sleep peacefully.

Most advice from doctors and other parents about how to calm a child is tailored to this situation. They provide for the establishment and strict adherence to a daily routine and evening procedures before bedtime, long walks in the fresh air, massage, and relaxing baths. All these recommendations really work, but not in the case when the baby wakes up at night and cries, starts screaming, doesn’t react to anything and doesn’t know what he wants. Unfortunately, some people encounter this situation quite often - sometimes even every night. What are these - children's night terrors? What is the reason for their appearance and how to deal with them?

Crying in a child's sleep may mean that the baby is having a nightmare.

Source of Nightmares

There are no children who are not afraid of anything at all. At the same time, fears that persist over a long period of time should attract the attention of parents. Their appearance is always due to certain factors and rarely happens out of nowhere. Among the most common are:

heredity;
severe pregnancy in the mother;
pathological situations during childbirth;
presence of serious diseases;
previous operations (especially under anesthesia);
lack of communication with mother;
various psychological traumas;
an abundance of impressions and overload of the nervous system;
tense atmosphere in the family - quarrels between parents, physical aggression on their part, stress and conflicts.

The reasons for the emergence of fears usually come from:

the child’s daily life – change of place of residence, school, kindergarten, changes in the environment, conflict situations;
situations within the family - the appearance of a new family member, including the birth of a younger brother or sister, death of relatives, divorce of parents;
media - television, radio and the Internet contain a lot of negative information: stories and programs about crimes, disasters and terrorist attacks, journalistic investigations, documentaries.

Children quickly absorb any information, especially negative information. Therefore, watching non-children's films can affect a child's sleep

Nightmares

Tantrums at night in a child can be caused by bad dreams. The cause of nightmares in sleep can be cartoons watched before bed. Today there are a lot of cartoons (especially animated series) that feature villains, monsters, evil robots and other evil spirits. For a child, especially a two-year-old, watching such programs is harmful and dangerous; they do not have the best effect on the psyche.

Do not turn on cartoons for your child at night at all, unless they are stories about Winnie the Pooh or other good characters (with no villains). For example, “Smeshariki”, Soviet and Disney cartoons are perfect. And best of all, before bedtime, don’t turn on the TV for your baby at all, play a quiet game, read a fairy tale.

How to identify fears?

Night fears in children usually appear before the age of one year, starting at 6 months, and are associated with the developmental characteristics of the baby. At 2–3 years old, children are afraid to be left alone; at 4–6 years old, they are frightened by the darkness and various monsters and monstrosities, which is reflected in their dreams. Characteristic features of nightmares are:

they usually begin 2 - 2.5 hours after falling asleep, usually between 1 and 3 hours;
duration - from 5 to 20 minutes, with a sudden start and end of hysteria;
repeating several times during the night;
the child wakes up abruptly, screams and cries, opens his eyes, but he does not notice anything around and does not react to anything (we recommend reading:);
during an attack, increased sweating and difficulty breathing are observed;
the child wakes up in hysterics, but does not react in any way to the appearance of his parents, since he is not aware of their presence or himself;
it is not possible to calm the baby’s hysterics or switch his attention to something else;
unconscious aggression towards parents and attempts to destroy the room in which they are located.

If you discover the above points in the behavior of your own baby, do not despair. It’s hard for any parent to watch their own child’s nightmares and tantrums and not be able to help him, but it is possible to correct the situation. You can seek help from a psychologist or wait until the baby grows up and the nightmares go away on their own.

Children's imagination is quite vivid. Therefore, the child can come up with many monsters hiding in his room. Parents need to dispel the child’s fears by showing that under the bed and in the closet there is absolutely nothing.

How to help your baby

Young children need to sleep in comfortable conditions. Falling asleep should be organized in a quiet room with fresh air.

It is advisable to protect children from obviously stressful situations. It is better to get accustomed to new conditions gradually. It is better to leave with a nanny and relatives for half an hour or an hour at first, gradually increasing the time of your absence.

If the baby is hysterical after waking up, it is better to give him the opportunity to scream. It is better to respond to all hysterics with external calm. This will discourage the baby and force him to calm down.

You can take your preschooler in your arms, lay him down, rock him slightly, and sing a soothing lullaby. If you think that your baby was having a nightmare, it is better not to focus on the dream. There is no need to ask what he saw in his dream. It is difficult for young children to concentrate and retell pictures born from the subconscious. It is better to take the baby away from the situation, to occupy him with games or feeding.

If your child becomes anxious during the day while he is awake, take him to a neurologist. Mild sedatives may be required. A doctor’s consultation is also necessary for parents of hyperactive children.

It is also necessary to exclude the disease, so it is worth paying attention to additional symptoms. If they are not there, the cause of hysterics is age-related changes.

How to deal with night terrors?

Hysterics and nightmares at night go away on their own with age, but following some simple recommendations can make them easier. You should:

stay calm - such problems are quite common in children aged 3 - 5 years and are not as terrible as they seem to you;
constantly be close to the baby - your task is not to allow him in this state to harm himself and others;
do not remind the child about what happened, so as not to intensify his feelings;
try to prevent the occurrence of nightmares by waking up your baby about 30 minutes after falling asleep - this way you will avoid another attack;
give the child the opportunity to get enough sleep by increasing the time allotted for sleep and organizing daytime rest, which is especially important for children under 3 years of age;
do not let your baby get overtired - monitor his loads during the day; for children 7–10 years old, if they refuse to sleep at night, change the time they wake up or go to bed;
show your child that you care - a close, trusting relationship will help you calmly discuss the situation and try to find the source of its occurrence.

Hysteria after nap in a child under 1 year old

Possible reasons: probably the baby was simply woken up at the wrong time, which affected his mood. It may also happen that some objects, sounds or phenomena on the street simply frightened the child, so his sleep was interrupted, and waking up was associated with unpleasant emotions.

What should I do? If a child under the age of one year has a tantrum after sleeping during a walk, we advise you to take the baby in your arms and try to rock him to sleep. A mother’s calm voice, a timely toy or a bottle of juice can distract you from unpleasant emotions.

If such tantrums occur in children under one year of age after sleeping at home, it makes sense to think about improving the sound insulation of the walls. Perhaps street sounds or the actions of other apartment residents wake up the baby, without allowing him to fully enjoy his daytime sleep. In this case, it is necessary not only to calm the child, but also to take preventive measures for such spontaneous awakening in the future.

Should I see a doctor?

In most situations, the help of parents is enough to overcome nightmares, but in some cases it is necessary to turn to specialists. Parents should be alert to the following symptoms:

the duration of the attack is more than 30 minutes;
nightmares come closer to morning;
during an attack, speech is impaired, behavior becomes inappropriate;
a child can cause harm to himself by his actions during a hysteria;
fears do not go away even during the day;
the cause of nightmares is the family situation - conflicts, parental divorce, domestic violence;
over time, the attacks become more severe and last more than a year;
nightmares and hysterics affect the baby’s behavior during the day;
During nightmares and hysterics, the baby experiences attacks of urinary incontinence.

If a child has a nightmare, parents should help him calm down.
Alternatively, you can lie down with him, read a book, the main thing is that the baby feels protected. Particular attention should be paid to the course of night attacks if children have convulsive readiness, expressed in:

sudden movements of the head;
shoulder twitching;
and eye rolling;
protruding tongue;
stuttering;
attacks of enuresis, repeated several times a night;
suffocation;
false croup;
bronchial asthma.

All of these symptoms only aggravate the situation with children's hysterics and nightmares. Reasons to immediately consult a doctor are attacks accompanied by:

screams;
motor excitement;
loss of consciousness.

When such symptoms appear, the baby’s condition is diagnosed and, based on its results, drug treatment is prescribed. To overcome problems, you may also need the help of a psychologist.

Medication solution

For nighttime hysterics in a 2-year-old child, medication should only be prescribed by a specialist and only after the cause of the disturbing sleep has been established. You should not prescribe pills to your baby yourself, they can only cause harm.

Usually, to improve sleep, a course of Magnesium B6, Glycine, and soothing teas, for example, Evening Fairy Tale, are prescribed. All these remedies will not harm the baby, but still you should not start giving them to the child without a doctor’s prescription, who will determine the correct dosage and frequency of administration.

Prevention and treatment

In the process of treating a child’s fears, you may have to resort to the help of a psychologist.
Nightmares themselves are rarely treated with the use of medications; they usually try to eliminate the cause of their occurrence. In cases where the source of their occurrence is a physical or mental illness, it is treated. If the nightmares are the result of stress or anxiety in the baby, consultation with a child psychologist or psychiatrist is necessary. Sometimes medications may be prescribed to reduce rapid eye movement or prevent night awakenings - this is only done if the child has serious sleep problems.

A psychologist should investigate the circumstances surrounding the emergence of children's fears. While communicating with the baby, he determines the source of nightmares, the degree of their danger and measures to combat them. The main diagnostic techniques are drawings, role-playing games and staging skits - in them, using the example of heroes, you can learn and analyze the causes of fears, and discuss their consequences.

The behavior of children best shows what kind of atmosphere is in the family and how the parents behave. It is they who, by their example, shape the child’s behavior patterns, which can lead to excessive fearfulness or distrust of others.

A calm, even atmosphere in the family, the absence of tension and conflicts will help the child overcome the fear of the dark and get rid of nightmares. Active sports can also be a good help in the fight against nightmares. Swimming, jumping from a tower or over a bar, martial arts - all this will give you confidence in your own abilities and relieve you of the fear of the dark, water, heights, and so on.

Working with childhood nightmares involves eliminating the immediate cause of fear. You should explain to your child that being afraid is absolutely normal and natural, since fear allows you to avoid dangerous situations. Parents should tell him more often that there is nothing shameful in fears, you need to accept them and learn to live with them.

A child's drawings can reflect all his fears and problems. An experienced psychologist will help you understand the causes of poor sleep problems.

Unfavorable psychological situation in the family

Children react sharply to the family situation. If parents swear, drink, scandals and even fights happen - all this affects the child’s psyche.

A child can get nervous even when parents scold an older brother or sister for getting a bad grade at school, doing homework, for lack of order in the room, and so on.

You should not yell at a two-year-old child, much less spank him for some pranks or carelessness.

You can always explain everything to everyone calmly. Avoid scandals at home, especially in the presence of children, and especially do not yell at them. Children's psyche is very weak. First, nightmares, hysterics, and then more serious psychological disorders may appear.

How to raise a brave child?

In order for a child to grow up courageous and active, it is necessary to make certain efforts, and the following recommendations can help in achieving this:

do not humiliate, but also do not make the child and his desires the main thing;
treat him as an equal, respect his personality;
do not scare the baby or punish him without serious reasons;
make sure that he has enough communication with different people - relatives, peers, friends;
make various crafts with your child, engage in creativity with him - this way you can monitor his mental state and neutralize fears that appear in time;
Hug and kiss your baby more often - physical contact with your parents will help him feel your care and protection;
monitor the atmosphere in the family - trust, respect and love will help reduce, or even completely get rid of fears.

How should parents behave?

You can overcome childhood fears by adhering to the following principles:

Respect the child and his fears, do not laugh at them or deny them. Higher participation and attention to the problem will give a greater effect than statements from the series “You are already too old to be afraid of the dark (more details in the article:)!”, “Stop inventing yourself!” and the like.
Do not shame or reproach your child for his experiences - this will only increase anxiety and lead to feelings of guilt. Let him know that even “real men” have the right to be afraid.
Don't try to force your child to overcome fear directly, for example by leaving him alone in a dark room. Offer him your help and support: look together at all the “scary” places where he sees various dangers, look in closets, under the bed, in dark corners. Not finding anyone there, the child will quickly believe in the groundlessness of his experiences and calm down.
When a child behaves badly, do not frighten him with various monsters and villains and do not threaten to give him away to anyone.

Understanding, care and love of parents are important components for a stable psyche of a child

Children's imagination is the source of night anxiety

All children are not alike - each of them has their own fantasies and their own opinions about everything. They can create the object of nightmares for themselves, and a more developed imagination will only make them more realistic. These child abilities can also be used to overcome fears.

Establish contact with your child to find out the source of the fear. Help your child separate his feelings from himself and overcome them by learning to change and control his feelings. Try for this:

together with your child, compose a story with a good ending, which tells about a way to overcome fear;
make a drawing that depicts fear, and then tear it up - simultaneously destroying the picture and helping the baby take control of his emotions.

Sleeping room

Try to provide your child with a personal room, if your capabilities allow you to do so. The environment in the nursery should create a cozy and calming atmosphere:

Provide good sound insulation in the nursery so that nothing disturbs the baby's sleep.
Maintain an optimal microclimate in the room - Dr. Komarovsky recommends for children a temperature of 18 - 20 ° C and a humidity of about 50 - 70%.
Regularly ventilate the room and do wet cleaning.
Use bedding only from natural fabrics. It should always be fresh and clean, calm colors in light colors. You can also use bedding with your baby's favorite characters.
Take care of the safety of the sleeping place, check for any sharp protrusions.
Using a radio or video nanny will allow you to promptly learn about your baby's restless sleep if he has his own room.
A special night light or a favorite toy taken with you to bed will protect you from monsters and drive away fears.

Help, who has encountered something similar. Until about 1.8, the child woke up like this: he fidgeted in the crib, then either started playing with the teddy bear, or got up and started telling something. After a nap, I generally liked to wake him up, since he was usually in just a great mood. And after 1.8, we gradually began to experience “post-sleep dramas.” And increasingly. That is, he wakes up and starts crying. Often, at the beginning of the cry, he, how can I explain it, strains it out. Well, it’s as if he doesn’t really want to cry right now, but he has to. That is, it starts with an exaggerated “henna-henna”, gradually accelerates and often ends with such high-quality hysteria. At the same time, he often gets angry. For example, he gets up in the crib, roars, I come up, try to pick him up, maybe he starts pushing him away and falls back into bed. But if I leave it there, he gets even angrier - he shouts something, waves his hands at me. Sometimes he goes into his arms, but in his arms he also bursts into tears, starts to wriggle out (like put him on the floor, mother), I put him on the floor and he screams even more. Questions (such as “Where does it hurt?”, “Do you want to drink?”, “Do you want to be held?”) are ignored or angry. This can last from several minutes to a couple of visits of 5-10 minutes each. We saw a neurologist a month ago and he said everything was fine. He didn’t really explain anything about post-sleep hysterics. Kind of normal. What has been tried: 1. All types of dances with tambourines: carry them on your arms, try to chat, make them laugh, get them drunk, play, distract, lie together on the bed, switch attention to other people (if someone is visiting at that time). It rarely works.

2. My husband doesn’t read modern books on parenting, so if he gets him up, he takes him out of bed, tries to distract him, if he doesn’t come out, he takes him into the room, puts him on our sofa (the child can easily get off of it himself) and offers a little more lie down, and when he wants, come to our kitchen. And he leaves. There is a standard scenario: short sobs for 3-5 minutes, then the child looks out of the room, I suggest they go wash and eat, he agrees. We go wash and eat (sometimes there is a second act in between, but rarely). This method is the most effective in terms of the duration of hysterics, but damn, it tramples all the currently fashionable theories about affection, tears of futility, etc. So I don't understand whether this is right or wrong.

3. Once a friend came to me and witnessed our awakening. She said that her daughter woke up the same way during the day as a child. The friend eventually came to the decision to simply leave her in bed for a while until she calmed down, because no methods worked either. Now her daughter, by the way, is 16 years old - a calm, adequate, creative girl. In short, I also tried this option-not-for-ideal-mothers. Result: standard: 5-15 minutes of sobbing, then gets up in the crib with a very unhappy look. I ask if he wants to be held in my arms, he says “yes”, I take it out.

4. This is a total nightmare, and it’s better not to read the ideal, persistent one who doesn’t lose his temper and always acts in harmony with the child, Gippenreiter and everyone else. But in general, at a moment of mental weakness and special antics, she lightly spanked the boy a couple of times. By the way, there was an effect: the boy thoughtfully touched his butt. While I was thinking, I managed to tell him that he probably wanted to get up and be held in his arms, he agreed, got it, But after 5 minutes, the failed dose of hysteria caught up with us - I don’t remember what the reason was, but we got the standard 10 minutes of sobbing.

In short, I don’t understand how to behave at all. He doesn't like everything and everything makes him angry. Sometimes I have the feeling that he has some kind of charge for a 5-10-minute hysteria, which he needs to cry out in any case. It feels like nothing hurts. Usually when something hurts he behaves and cries differently. Occasionally it is possible to stop everything if you are immediately ready to hold it in your arms and don’t mind sitting on them. Well, or it happens (once a month, probably) that he just wakes up calmly. In the morning, he also starts crying right away, but calms down as soon as you get him out of the crib. Who has encountered this, please share what helps you and how best to behave? The child is 2.3.

Children's tantrums can complicate the life of anyone, even very patient adults. Just yesterday the baby was a “darling”, but today he has been replaced - he screams for any reason, squeals, falls on the floor, bangs his head against the walls and carpet, and no amount of persuasion helps. Such unpleasant scenes are almost never just one-off protests. Often, a child’s tantrums are repeated systematically, sometimes several times a day.

This cannot but worry and puzzle parents who wonder what they did wrong, whether everything is okay with the baby and how to stop these antics. The authoritative, famous children's doctor Evgeniy Komarovsky tells moms and dads how to respond to children's tantrums.

No daytime rest

It is this factor that can provoke night tantrums in a 2-year-old child. Until this age, children must rest during the day. With the onset of two years of age, many mothers and fathers make a mistake: the baby does not ask to sleep, so let him play, fall asleep earlier in the evening and sleep more soundly throughout the night. You can't give up daytime sleep. For a child, a whole day is a very long period; the baby’s body must rest for some time.

Many children really do not feel tired, and when their mother calls them to sleep for an hour, they refuse, run away, and may even begin to act up. It’s okay, try to calm the child as much as possible, he will definitely fall asleep.

About the problem

Children's tantrums are a ubiquitous phenomenon. And even if the parents of a toddler say that they have the calmest baby in the world, this does not mean that he never makes a scene out of the blue. Until recently, it was somehow embarrassing to admit to hysterics in one’s own child; parents were embarrassed, in case those around them would think that they were raising a toddler poorly, and sometimes they were even afraid that others would consider their beloved child mentally “not like that.” So we fought as best we could, in the family circle.

In recent years, they began to talk about the problem with specialists, child psychologists, psychiatrists, neurologists and pediatricians. And an insight came: there are much more hysterical children than might seem at first glance. According to statistics available to child psychologists in one of the large clinics in Moscow, 80% of children under the age of 6 experience tantrums periodically, and 55% of such children have regular hysterics. On average, children can have such attacks from 1 time a week to 3-5 times a day.

A child's tantrum has certain core symptoms. As a rule, an attack is preceded by some identical events and situations.

During a hysteria, a child may scream heart-rendingly, tremble, choke, and there will not be so many tears. There may be trouble breathing, the heart rate increases, and many children try to harm themselves by scratching their faces, biting their hands, hitting walls or the floor. The attacks in children are quite long, after which they cannot calm down for a long time and sob.

At certain age periods, hysterics acquire stronger manifestations; at such “critical” stages of growing up, emotional outbursts change their color. They may appear unexpectedly, or they may disappear just as suddenly. But hysterics should never be ignored, just as a child should not be allowed to manipulate adult family members by screaming and stamping his feet.

Folk remedies

How to save a 2-year-old child from nighttime tantrums? Drugs may not be required at all, because there are many traditional methods for improving children's sleep and getting rid of nightmares.

Aromatherapy. Before going to bed, bathe your baby in warm water and add a few drops of lavender oil to the bath. This remedy has long been used for deep and restful sleep. The same oil can be dripped onto the far corner of the child’s pillow or blanket. After a couple of hours, it will begin to smell fragrant, giving the baby a restful sleep.
“Sleepy tea” can be bought at a pharmacy, or you can make it yourself. Brew 0.5-1 tablespoon of hop cones in a glass of boiling water, let it brew and cool, and before bedtime, let your baby drink a third of the glass.
“Sleepy cocktail” will appeal to those with a sweet tooth. Grind a banana with half a glass of milk (warm) and half a glass of chamomile tea. Add two drops of motherwort and a spoonful of honey.

Doctor Komarovsky's opinion

First of all, says Evgeniy Komarovsky, parents should remember that a child in a state of hysterics definitely needs an audience.

Kids never make scandals in front of the TV or washing machine; they choose a living person, and among the family members, the one who is most sensitive to his behavior is suitable for the role of spectator.

If dad begins to worry and get nervous, then he will be the one chosen by the child for a spectacular hysteria. And if the mother ignores the child’s behavior, then throwing a tantrum in front of her is simply not interesting.

Dr. Komarovskaya will tell you how to wean your child from hysterics in the next video.

This opinion somewhat contradicts the generally accepted opinion of child psychologists, who claim that a child in a state of hysterics has absolutely no control over himself. Komarovsky is sure that the baby is perfectly aware of the situation and the balance of power, and everything he does at this moment is done completely arbitrarily.

Therefore, the main advice from Komarovsky is to in no way show that parents are touched by the children’s “concert” in any way. No matter how strong the tears, screams and stamping of feet may be.

If a child ever gets his way with a tantrum, he will use this method constantly. Komarovsky warns parents to cajole their child during a tantrum.

To give in means to become a victim of manipulation, which will, to one degree or another, constantly improving, continue for the rest of your life.

It is advisable that all family members adhere to calm tactics of behavior and rejection of hysterics,

so that mom’s “no” never turns into dad’s “yes” or grandma’s “maybe.” Then the child will quickly understand that hysteria is not a method at all, and will stop testing the nerves of adults.

If the grandmother begins to show gentleness and pity the child offended by parental refusal, then she risks becoming the only spectator of children's hysterics. The problem, says Komarovsky, is the lack of physical security with such grandmothers. After all, usually a grandson or granddaughter gradually stops obeying them and can end up in an unpleasant situation in which they can get injured during a walk,

get burned by boiling water in the kitchen, stick something into a socket, etc., because the baby will not react in any way to the grandmother’s calls.

What to do?

If a child is 1-2 years old, he is quite quickly able to form correct behavior at the reflex level.

Komarovsky advises putting the baby in a playpen where he will have a safe space. As soon as the hysteria begins, leave the room, but let the child know that he is being heard. As soon as the little one is silent, you can go into his room. If the scream repeats, go out again.

According to Evgeniy Olegovich, two days are enough for a one and a half to two year old child to develop a stable reflex - “mom is nearby if I don’t yell.”

For such “training,” parents will truly need nerves of iron, the doctor emphasizes. However, their efforts will certainly be rewarded by the fact that in a short time an adequate, calm and obedient child will grow up in their family. And one more important point - the sooner parents put this knowledge into practice, the better it will be for everyone.

If the child is already over 3 years old, this method alone cannot be used. More painstaking work on errors will be required. First of all, over parental mistakes in raising their own child.

The child does not obey and is hysterical

Absolutely any children can be naughty, says Komarovsky. Much depends on the character, temperament, upbringing, norms of behavior that are accepted in the family, on the relationships between the members of this family.

Don’t forget about the “transitional” age - 3 years, 6-7 years, adolescence.

3 years

At the age of about three years, a child begins to understand and become aware of himself in this big world,

and, naturally, he wants to try this world for strength. In addition, children at this age are not yet and are not always able to express in words their feelings, emotions and experiences on any occasion. So they show them in the form of hysterics.

Quite often at this age stage, night tantrums begin.

They are spontaneous in nature, the child simply wakes up at night and immediately practices a piercing cry, arches, sometimes tries to break free from adults and try to run away. Typically, nighttime tantrums do not last so long, and the child “outgrows” them; they stop as suddenly as they began.

6-7 years

At 6-7 years old, a new stage of growing up occurs. The baby is already ripe to go to school, and they are beginning to demand more from him than before. He is very afraid of not meeting these requirements, he is afraid of “letting him down,” the stress accumulates and sometimes spills out again in the form of hysteria.

Evgeny Komarovsky emphasizes that most often parents turn to doctors with this problem when the child is already 4-5 years old, when hysterics occur “out of habit.”

If at an earlier age the parents failed to stop this behavior and unwittingly became participants in a harsh performance that the child plays out in front of them every day, trying to achieve something of his own.

Parents are usually frightened by some external manifestations of hysteria, such as a semi-fainting state of the child, convulsions, “hysterical bridge” (arching the back), deep sobs and breathing problems. Affective-respiratory disorders, as Evgeniy Olegovich calls this phenomenon, are characteristic mainly of young children - up to 3 years old. With strong crying, the child exhales almost the entire volume of air from the lungs, and this leads to paleness and breath holding.

Such attacks are typical for capricious and excitable children, says Komarovsky.

Many children use other methods of venting anger, disappointment or resentment - they sublimate the emotion into movement - falling, knocking their feet and hands, hitting their heads against objects, walls, the floor.

With a prolonged and severe hysterical affective-respiratory attack, involuntary convulsions may begin if the child’s consciousness begins to suffer. Sometimes in this state the baby can wet himself, even if he has been going potty perfectly for a long time, and no incidents happen. Usually, after convulsions (tonic - with muscle tension or clonic - with relaxation, “limping”), breathing is restored, the skin ceases to be “blue,” and the baby begins to calm down.

With such manifestations of hysteria, it is still better to consult a pediatric neurologist, since the same symptoms are characteristic of some nervous disorders.

Teach your child to express emotions in words.
Your child cannot avoid being angry or irritated at all, like any other normal person. You just need to teach him how to correctly express his anger or irritation.
A child prone to hysterical attacks should not be overly patronized, coddled and cherished; it is best to send him to kindergarten as early as possible. There, Komarovsky says, attacks usually do not occur at all due to the absence of constant and impressionable spectators of hysterics - mom and dad.
Hysterical attacks can be learned to anticipate and control.
To do this, parents need to carefully observe when the hysteria usually begins. The child may be sleep-deprived, hungry, or he cannot stand being rushed. Try to avoid potential “conflict” situations.
At the first sign of a hysteria beginning, you need to try to distract the child.
Usually, Komarovsky says, this “works” quite successfully with children under three years of age. With older guys it will be more difficult.
If your child tends to hold his breath during a tantrum, there is nothing particularly wrong with that.
Komarovsky says that in order to improve breathing, you just need to blow in the baby’s face, and he will definitely take a reflexive breath.
No matter how difficult it may be for parents to deal with their child’s tantrums, Komarovsky strongly recommends going all the way. If you let your child defeat you with a tantrum, it will be even more difficult later. After all, from a hysterical three-year-old one day, a hysterical and completely obnoxious teenager of 15-16 years old will grow up. It will ruin the lives of not only the parents. He will make it very difficult for himself.

Doctor Komarovsky

A child's tantrum is not an easy test for any mother. And when a child suddenly wakes up screaming after several hours of sleep and there is nothing possible to calm him down, then confusion and despair are unsettling. After all, it is very difficult to plan your actions in advance. Moreover, children can start screaming both after a nap and when waking up in the middle of the night. We will look at how to react correctly so as not to harm the child and where to look for the cause of children’s tantrums in the next article.

Features of four-year-old children

The inner world of a 4-year-old person is already quite formed. He knows the world around him well and begins to understand the processes occurring in the environment. At the age of four, a child first realizes that life is finite. Information about death is a significant shock to the psyche. The child does not want to come to terms with the idea that he will one day be gone. Because of thoughts of death, he cries quietly into his pillow at night.

It is impossible to protect a child from information about death. One way or another he will have to experience this knowledge. You can tell your son or daughter that life is not limited to the material world. It doesn't matter whether you yourself believe in life after death. Such information will help relieve anxiety, and as the child grows up, he will figure out what’s what.

If a child is hysterical, screams, loudly and demonstratively gets his way, and the family submits to increasingly persistent and sophisticated demands for the sake of silence

The child is not to blame for anything. He balances the imperfections of the surrounding world. What we, people, are trying to express and understand in words, we just need to feel. It is a feeling that is concentrated information that can be endlessly described in different words.

Whims, stubbornness, demonstrative behavior are a test of strength. Where there is submission, agreement for the quickest appearance of harmony, there is a counterbalance. And the stronger the submission, the stronger and more powerful the return. “Appearances of harmony” is because there is a feeling inside that such agreement is the wrong choice. The sooner the family becomes aware of responsibility for the result, the courage to change the situation, confidence in the correctness of the choice and determination in carrying out what is conscious, the sooner the child will be given the opportunity to live in a happy childhood. Where he feels like a harmoniously developing child. And not a manager. A family thunderstorm. Manipulator.

Steps towards a happy family

A clear rule
that takes into account the interests of each participant. For example, that the child will be in kindergarten from 8:30 to 16:30. That is, if the child is still uncomfortable in an alien environment, then he is given the opportunity to leave early - after sleep and afternoon snack. But at the same time, he a) gets accustomed to the kindergarten regime and gets used to the demands of the surrounding world besides the family; b) the mother has the opportunity to take care of household chores and the younger child, as well as choose time to rest.
The implementation of a clear rule must be constant
. Not a one-time thing. More than once. And always. Otherwise, the child will understand that when pressure is applied, he will still be the last decisive factor. This completely deprives parents of the right to be wiser, the right to be respected by their own children (the younger one also learns from the older one). And the child is deprived of the right to be a harmoniously developed personality. In later life, such a person faces many difficulties, which one way or another will instill in him equal respect for both himself and other people. The task of parents is to teach their child this in childhood, saving him from unnecessary problems. And yourself from reproaches and pain.
Explain
clearly and endlessly to the child all your actions and requirements. Be sure to say why it is important. What will happen if you do such and such. And what will happen if you do it differently. If your child has additional questions, be sure to answer them. A child is a full-fledged person. The soul has no age and therefore you need to treat it as an equal. Don't babysit. But don’t hand over the reins of power to still fragile hands. He learns everything. He absorbs everything. And he uses everything.
Dedicate time
that will belong only to the child. This is at least 15-30 minutes a day. But only to him. Ask what you would like to do together. Set aside time, at least a few minutes, for the whole family to engage in some interesting outdoor or any exciting game. Be outside more.
To fulfill promises.
Failure to follow your own rules will be clearly understood and will teach you to be cunning, deceive, and disrespect.
When performing daily tasks,
teach something useful in everyday life Pay attention to the child. This enriches his inner world and develops versatility.

I wish love and harmony to your family and your children.

Possible causes of a child's tantrum after waking up

Every mother, even with the most steely nerves, is confused when her baby suddenly starts screaming loudly, falling to the floor and breaking out of her hands. Especially if the little one is still too small and is not able to explain the reason for his restless awakening. Parents are trying with all their might to calm the child down, but they don’t know how to help him...

Here it is important to pull yourself together and, first of all, find out the reason for such behavior of your son or daughter. After all, it is quite possible that the child is sick and requires an immediate diagnosis in order to begin treatment as soon as possible. But there are also various other stimuli to which children react in a similar way.

Nightmares. All people have bad dreams sometimes. And children are no exception. Especially if they had some unpleasant incident during the day. For example, someone else’s child took away his favorite toy in kindergarten, or the child ran across the playground and hit something painfully.
Unfavorable atmosphere in the house. If everything is good and calm in the family, then most likely the child will develop normally and behave obediently, without whims and hysterics. And if someone in the family constantly sorts things out, raising their voice, at each other or at the child, then with a high probability the son or daughter will also be nervous. And during sleep, they will re-experience the negative emotions that they had to feel during the day.
Physiological reasons. In most cases, they are associated with periodic pain or unhealthy condition of the child. For example, a baby’s gums hurt very much during teething, or because of a cold, he has a very sore throat and a stuffy nose, which also makes it very difficult to sleep. In such conditions, the baby suddenly wakes up screaming.
The room is too hot and the baby wakes up with difficulty breathing. He feels discomfort and therefore is capricious. Since metabolic processes in the skin occur more intensely in children, children are very sensitive to the rise in temperature and sweat faster than adults.

Causes of tantrums in children 1-4 years old

Hysteria manifests itself in loud unnatural crying, turning into a squeal. At the same time, the baby arches his body and does not respond to the words and actions of adults. Infants usually do not have hysterics, but cry, which serves as a call. The parent only has to satisfy the needs of the newborn: feed, warm, change diapers.

Hysterics occur at a more conscious age - from 1-1.5 to 3-4 years. At this age, a preschooler actively learns about the world around him, the laws of society, and meets new people. Sometimes the psyche of children cannot withstand overload and you can relieve stress by screaming.

Neurologists consider hysterical crying a normal reaction of a fragile child's psyche to stimuli. In a dream, a baby can re-experience a traumatic situation or see a plot that did not happen in reality.

The baby is still too small to distinguish reality from unreality. Therefore, if he dreams that his parents put him in a corner, resentment and aggression will be directed at his parents; if he dreams that he was offended by a peer, this situation will also be perceived as quite real.

Hysterics can also occur after sudden changes in life. For example, the baby went to kindergarten or was weaned off the bottle. With the help of a cry, the baby tries to relieve the tension that has arisen. During the day, the traumatic situation is forgotten and the child enthusiastically plays with toys. But after waking up, the first thing that arises is disturbing thoughts.
Mood may drop after sleep due to waking up late. If a child sleeps in the afternoon, then after waking up he feels lethargic and tired, just like an adult.
The reason may also be poor quality sleep. If your baby sleeps in a noisy room or sounds come from outside, he may feel sleep deprived.
The main causes of hysterical awakening can be attributed to overexcitation of the nervous system. By the age of 4, the nervous system is strengthened, and the preschooler does not react so sharply to daytime events.

Hysterics are provoked by stressful situations in the family, for example, quarrels between parents. Children aged 1-4 years perceive domestic scandals very acutely and react with day and night hysterics. In this case, the child may jump up in the middle of the night, start screaming, and the next morning not remember anything.

What should parents do?

According to statistics, every child experiences tantrums from time to time. And parents should not have any special reasons for concern, unless such cases become regular. When a child wakes up screaming, the most important thing for parents in such a situation is to remain calm and try to calm their baby. If your child is still very young, try offering him one of the following options:

give me something to drink,
take in your arms,
bring his favorite treat or toy.

But here’s what you definitely shouldn’t do:

yell at a child
slap him on the cheeks
leave alone.

If a child refuses everything and literally does not hear you, then you should take a closer look at him. You need to carefully observe his behavior and appearance. For example, if he tightens his legs, then perhaps his stomach hurts, and if he has a fever and swollen red gums, then he is probably teething. When hysterics are observed in a child over three years old, it makes sense to ask in more detail about the reasons for such behavior.

At any age, there are symptoms that accompany hysteria, for which you should immediately consult a doctor.

Severe hysteria that does not stop for half an hour or more.
When a child screams loudly, convulsions and fever begin.
The fears do not stop during the daytime.
Hysterics have become regular and you are unable to independently determine the cause and cope with it.

How to cope with a child's fears?

Everyone had some kind of fear in childhood. They are associated with various reasons. For example, a baby is terrified of the dark or cannot be left alone in a confined space. There are cases when a child is “intimidated” by one of his peers or older children. And he begins to be afraid of losing his mother or thinks that monsters live in closets and dark corners. To find out the specific danger that the baby is afraid of, you need to calmly talk to him and dispel all his fears. If you cannot do this on your own, then you should seek help from a specialist and undergo anti-stress therapy. It includes activities aimed at psychological support and emotional relief for the child.

You should not deny or laugh at your child’s fears, even if they seem childish and stupid to you. It’s better to ask what exactly the child is afraid of, rather than brushing him off with the phrase: “You’re too old to be afraid of the dark!”
During the day, conduct activities aimed at relieving stress and anxiety in your child. Finger painting, modeling and various games with water can distract a little person from any worries and relieve emotional stress.
Support your child with your story about your own overcoming of fears in childhood. This way he will understand that everything is surmountable, and he is not left alone with his phobias.

Normalizing a child's sleep

In fact, tantrums in children are not such a rare occurrence. They are more associated with adolescence, as a rule, these are intervals from 1 year to 2 years, then at 3 years and at 6-7 years. But if such restless behavior is observed only during awakening, then parents should take care of activities that will favorably influence the sound and healthy sleep of their child.

How to normalize your baby's sleep?

Introduce a strict sleep and rest regime. Follow a specific schedule for your child to wake up and stay awake every day. For example, if your baby wakes up at 8.00 every morning, and in the evening he goes to bed at 22.00, then you should not deviate from the usual daily routine. This will make it easier for him to fall asleep and wake up at the same time. In addition, the daily routine is very useful for developing immunity in childhood.
Mandatory walks before bed. At least 2-3 hours before bedtime, you need to go outside with your child to get some fresh air. It’s even better if he runs and jumps a lot, then he will be physically tired, and it will be better to sleep at night until the morning. Thus, he simply does not have enough strength for nightly hysterics.
In the evening, just before bed, avoid watching cartoons or TV shows; it is better to play calm, quiet games with your child. This way, his nervous system will not be overloaded and he will get ready for bed faster.
Relaxing bath at night. To prepare it, you need to purchase one or more “soothing” ingredients at the pharmacy: motherwort, calendula, mint, lemon balm or pine extract.
Ventilate the room at least 1 hour before your child goes to bed.
Give your baby a soothing herbal tea. You can easily purchase it at any pharmacy. Many of the herbal teas are intended for babies over one year old.

Over time, when the child grows up, the hysterics and restless behavior that tormented the baby during sleep will pass. This usually occurs by 4-5 years of age. But if the problem is protracted and the child is too emotional during the daytime, then you should seriously think about the child’s health. After all, such behavior is a sign of some neurological diseases. For example, increased intracranial pressure or hyperactivity, which can only be recognized by experienced specialists.

Hysteria after sleep in an older child

The needs of infants most often come down to the need to sleep and eat, but children 2-4 years old are already more conscious of their desires and needs. It is at this age that tantrums after sleep, oddly enough, are considered a more regular occurrence. This is due to the more active functioning of the brain, which can send signals to the baby in the form of both pleasant dreams and nightmares.

If a child’s hysteria occurs constantly after sleep, then its causes are most likely the following.

Trivial lack of sleep

Hysterics can also occur in a child who did not want to go to bed, but eventually fell asleep. Waking up after an unwanted dream can often be met with violent hysterics.

Baby's nightmares

To ensure a restful sleep for your child, we recommend giving your baby a glass of warm milk with honey at night. Falling asleep with a parent or simply spending 20-30 minutes with the child on the part of the mother or father before bedtime can also help with the problem. You can simply lie next to your baby, talk to him, play calm games or read a book.

Hysteria associated with violent games the day before

Any emotions, both positive and negative, can have a certain effect on the child during sleep. Try to ensure that your baby stops being too active 2-3 hours before bedtime. It is not advisable to receive guests during this period, play active games and have too much fun.

Stressful situation

Thus, many mothers notice that regular hysterics occur in their children after they start attending kindergarten. Of course, emotions, communication, and unusual surroundings cannot but affect the psycho-emotional state of the baby. This is where hysterics arise. Such manifestations will disappear very soon as soon as the baby gets used to the new environment and team. Until then, parents are required to actively support the child, frequent conversations and the opportunity to pay increased attention.