Many people (or rather, the majority) are afraid of death. Some themselves are afraid to die, while others are afraid of the act of death itself and any mention of it. But if this fear becomes so overwhelming that it begins to affect a person’s daily life, then we can already talk about a full-blown phobia.
The fear of death is so widespread that it has stimulated numerous research projects and intrigued everyone from scientists to religious theorists around the world. When studying the fear of death, some interesting facts were revealed. For example, women in general are more afraid of death than men (perhaps because women are more likely to acknowledge and discuss their fears).
There is some contradiction in the research on the topic of fear of death among young people and among older people. While many researchers argue that young people fear death more than older people, others claim that the fear of death does not actually decrease with age. Interestingly, a number of studies have shown that in terminally ill patients, the fear of imminent death decreases significantly after they are placed in hospice. This is likely because they receive emotional and spiritual support from hospice staff.
So what is it all about – the fear of death, which makes everyone experience rather unpleasant moments of emotional and psychological discomfort? What forms does it take and for what reasons does it arise?
How does thanatophobia manifest itself?
Thanatophobia syndrome has different symptoms . For example, it can be expressed in an uncontrollable fear of the inevitability and the unknown, or in anxiety that death will come suddenly. At the same time, a person does not always worry only about himself. Sometimes he has the feeling that danger awaits his family and friends.
In extreme forms of panic fear of dying, people become depressed, sometimes even considering suicide as a way out. Indeed, nothing is more depressing than the awareness of the unknown, the inevitability and the impossibility of getting rid of thoughts about death. The problem becomes more complicated if thoughts about the futility of existence are added to this. However, as some experts believe, absolutely everything that a person fears in life is a veiled fear of non-existence.
Some symptoms of fear of death
Experts in the field of psychology advise looking at both the overall picture of the problem as a whole and at individual manifestations, down to every little detail. Therefore, it is worth taking a closer look at yourself and your loved ones - perhaps you don’t know something, including about your “I”.
The manifestation of the following symptoms will help to recognize thanatophobia:
- A feeling of insurmountable anxiety against the backdrop of awareness of imminent death.
- Constant despair in the absence of a real threat to life at the present time.
- Somatic manifestations such as sleep disturbance, loss of appetite and weight loss.
- Obsessive thoughts, fixation on an imagined scenario of death. For example, panic fear of dying in a plane crash or in the throes of a serious illness. This is accompanied by the fact that a person subject to such fear begins to avoid conditions and objects that, in his opinion, correspond to the dying scenario: he tries not to travel on airplanes, avoids doctors and bypasses hospitals.
- Some character traits that are at the limit of the norm, which can be expressed in increased anxiety, suspiciousness, impressionability, self-doubt and excitability. The consequence of this is increased vulnerability to certain psychogenic influences, but at the same time increased resistance to some others is manifested.
- Obsession with values and the most important ideas that are created by the phobic person himself, as well as persistence and aggression towards their implementation and implementation (even to the point of Jesuitism).
- Reducing the number of social contacts, including with family and friends.
- Socially important and professional matters fade into the background or are completely crossed out.
- Painful sensations of a neurotic nature, as well as constant stress, which contributes to negative changes in the physiology of the body (for example, malfunctions of organs and systems).
- Decreased sexual activity or its complete disappearance.
- In some cases, prolonged and overwhelming stress can result in destructive addictions, such as alcohol or drug use.
Individually, these symptoms do not yet indicate an obsessive fear of dying , but taken together they can already indicate this. The more of the listed manifestations a person has, the more likely it is that he has thanatophobia. However, some people hide this fear so deeply that it cannot be revealed without a frank personal conversation or a visit to a psychologist.
Forms of manifestation of fear
Each person has a feeling of fear in its own form. If there is at least one of them, then we can already talk about a phobia, the only question is its degree. Forms of thanatophobia:
- Fear of pain, suffering and loss against their background of dignity. This form of fear manifests itself through fear not of death itself, but of its circumstances. A person imagines how he will suffer, become pitiful and lose his dignity. Often this form is accompanied by an obsessive fear of getting sick.
- Fear of the unknown and uncertainty of what awaits at the moment of dying. Since no one knows whether there is life after death, or what death itself is, this form of fear is quite strong and largely justified. It is incredibly difficult for human perception to comprehend the very essence of existence outside of life, hence confusion arises.
- Fear of eternal non-existence or punishment. Once a person believes in painful punishment after bodily existence, it can be difficult for a person to live with it, and sometimes not only believers are susceptible to this. Even stronger than fears about punishment for bad deeds is the fear that after death nothing awaits at all - complete oblivion and, as a consequence, the futility of the entire past life.
- Anxiety about lack of control. The very idea that death is beyond control and cannot be influenced is the source of many phobias. Neither adherence to strict and rational rules of a healthy lifestyle, nor safety measures brings a calming sense of control into a person’s life, but only makes him think even more about the problem. At the same time, some, especially children, seek “salvation” in violent computer games, as they contribute to the formation of a sense of power over events.
- Fear of mental anguish from irreparable losses. It manifests itself in the form of a constant fear of losing loved ones and relatives, as well as in a panicked state of a woman before childbirth, who cannot get rid of thoughts about the possible loss of a child.
- Anxiety about sudden death, without having time to realize all your ideas and take place in all areas of life.
- Fears about passing away without a trace, leaving nothing behind, not even pleasant memories for family, friends and acquaintances.
- Fear of loneliness during the dying process and after it. Everyone goes through death on their own - this is probably the only state in which no one can take us by the hand, support us or lead us where we need to go. This is a state of total loneliness in which everyone is left alone with their thoughts. Those who are entirely focused on this state fear it the most.
Only by deciding on the form can one judge the pathological fear of death . How to get rid of it is a question that requires an integrated approach. At the same time, many forms of fear in themselves do not speak of pathology. Painful phobias are indicated by the degree of severity and absurdity of behavior, decision-making mechanisms and life values. Both fear and death are natural components of living nature. But if fears about death do not allow one to live normally, this is already a clear feature of a pathological state of the psyche.
What can this obsessive fear lead to?
In psychology, the obsessive and almost constant fear of dying is called “thanatophobia.” And if you notice that fear has developed into a phobia, then be sure to start fighting it, because its consequences can be very serious.
Thus, many people who are afraid of death begin to fear diseases and try in every possible way to protect themselves from them, regularly and sometimes very often visiting doctors and undergoing all kinds of examinations. And this, undoubtedly, interferes with life, both for the feared person and for his loved ones. As a result, it can lead to depression or neurosis, and such conditions require the help of a specialist.
Stop being afraid of death, just live and enjoy life!
What are the causes of thanatophobia
There is no single reason why fears of death arise for everyone. This may be a hereditary predisposition, and the conditions for the formation of personality, and the influence of society with its realities. But we can identify generalized causes of thanatophobia, including :
- Features of acquiring personal life experience and the formation of an individual. This includes various uncontrollable circumstances, for example, those associated with the loss of friends and loved ones as a result of sudden events, which can influence the development of a pronounced phobia. Even the tragedies and misfortunes of strangers are sometimes able to draw attention from a pathological side to the issue of the transience of life.
- Sudden negative changes in your personal life. The loss of not only health, but even work, material well-being, honor and respect in the eyes of other members of society - all this can become a provoking factor.
- Disorders of intrapersonal development. Any personal path has only two directions: towards progress or degradation. In both of these cases, an individual can walk with a positive vision of the world and himself in it, or noticing only complete negativity. Degradation and/or seeing the essence of things in a negative way often aggravates thanatophobia if a person is also susceptible to philosophical approaches to solving issues of existence. This gives rise to masses of thoughts about the meaninglessness of all things, leads to conclusions about non-existence and raises the question of the purposefulness of all life. As a result, suicidal thoughts are possible.
- Life and age-related crises, in conditions of which there is a reassessment of personal priorities and approaches to various things, including life. The main problems during such crises are unfulfilled goals, debunked hopes and principles. Certain results of the life lived are summed up and a glance is directed at what remains of it.
- Religious beliefs and adherence to superstitions. Fear of one's own actions that contradict the canons is the reason for the formation of the fear of being called to account for them. Some begin to imagine all sorts of incarnations of death, for example, in a hood and with a scythe at the ready, and also believe that they will go to hell.
- A feeling of dissatisfaction with your life and the world in general. Thanatophobia can manifest itself more strongly, the brighter this dissatisfaction. Although in such cases death can be considered as something of a way out of the oppressive circumstances of life, which is also dangerous.
- Fear of everything new. This personality trait is a trigger for a panicky fear of death. When a person tries to keep himself within the usual framework at any cost, and the possibility of death and its unknown nature does not fit into these frameworks, a distorted perception of the end of life occurs, expressed in overly anxious behavior.
Other sources of fear of death may also arise . How to get rid of it - the answer to this question is not always tied to specific reasons, but in any case an individual approach is needed.
Fear turning into phobia
Fear of death is not always bad, no matter how strange it may seem. He may be healthy. When we are afraid of dying, we become more careful and take appropriate measures to keep ourselves safe. For example, we fasten seat belts in a car or wear helmets when riding a motorcycle. A healthy fear of nothingness also reminds us that we must make the most of our time here on this earth. It can motivate us to work hard to leave behind a lasting legacy and take care of those we love.
But the fear of death can become so strong that it begins to paralyze a person and will not allow him to live normally. He will occupy all the thoughts of the unfortunate person and begin to influence the decisions he makes. This is already an unhealthy fear, which is called thanatophobia, and in this case we need to talk about the need to seek help from a qualified specialist.
This phobia can give rise to other “related” obsessive fears - for example, necrophobia, or the fear of everything connected with the dead and the burial process. A person begins to avoid the sight of tombstones, funeral processions, funeral bureaus - everything that is a symbol of death for him and can serve as a reminder of the main phobia.
Definition of thanatophobia
Thanatophobia is, in fact, the “fear of death”: “thanatos”, that is, “death”, and “phobia”, that is, “fear”. This is a relatively complex phobia, which is divided into subgroups: fear of pain and suffering, fear of loss, and so on. Thanatophobia can be quite severe, making it difficult to lead a normal life, and this psychological condition requires special help.
Since there are many causes of thanatophobia and possible complications, it is very important that the diagnosis is carried out by a qualified specialist. He will ask leading questions and help the patient understand what exactly is happening to him. He will also be able to recognize the symptoms of disorders and, if necessary, prescribe the appropriate course of treatment.
How is thanatophobia usually treated?
The course of treatment largely depends on the severity of the condition and the personal goals pursued by the patient. What is he trying to achieve? Does he want to resolve some internal conflict? Or is he simply trying to get rid of difficult thoughts and wants to be able, for example, to calmly react to scenes of death of movie characters or to pass by funeral processions without panic? The physician must be aware of his client's expectations before he develops a treatment plan.
Depending on the circumstances, it may be appropriate to begin treatment with cognitive behavioral therapy. Other treatment methods can be used in combination with it.
How to overcome the fear of death
The causes of thanatophobia in each specific case are not always known, and fear does not have any universal treatment. You can pay attention to individual techniques or resort to an integrated approach, using several methods at once. In difficult cases, it is recommended not to isolate yourself, but to consult a psychologist .
Specific methods usually include cognitive behavioral psychotherapy, hypnosis, and various medications. But without an internal mindset to solve the problem, none of the above will help, so it is important to start with your own awareness that death is the norm. This will play a decisive role in overcoming the fear of it. To do this, you will have to start the fight consciously, and not because of the public belief that this fear is bad and needs to be gotten rid of. You need to see reasons specifically for yourself, otherwise motivation will be insufficient.
What should we start from?
In psychology, there is such a technique for getting rid of obsessive thoughts and habits as simply not thinking about the subject. His rule is based on the following: the stronger the desire to throw away an object, the more strongly you think about it, and in the context of psychology, this also means that the stronger this object will be squeezed in your hand. This only means that the surest way to get rid of something is not only not to think about the problem, but also to fight it. Just not allowing the thought itself, keeping your mind completely pure.
But this is relevant if a person is able to understand and recognize the problem, and not in cases of psychosis, when there is no clear awareness of the problem and the surrounding reality.
This mechanism is due to the fact that increased concentration of attention on countering the source of fear originates in the very counteraction to thoughts of fear. And it is impossible to get rid of some thoughts by others, aimed at counteracting the first. This impossibility is explained by the fact that counter-installations are not self-sufficient, they are completely dependent on obsessive thoughts and do not exist without them.
Figuratively speaking, the fear of death is a sword, and your counter-attitude is a shield that can be exposed to attack. But the problem is that the more defensively a person goes into defense, furiously throwing himself with a shield at the sword, the greater the blow he will receive. It is impossible to take the lead with this approach, because any defensive reaction follows the irritating factor. In this way, there is no way to stop thinking about the threat, and this is precisely the main task .
The only solution is not to think not only about what exactly worries you (in this case, the fear of death), but even about ways to help with this. No matter how contradictory it may sound, this approach is a component of full-fledged deliverance, otherwise there is a high risk of becoming dependent on thoughts about death on the other side, going in a vicious circle. You need to start adhering to this subtle method immediately, remembering that the more aggressive the attack on hateful thoughts, anxieties and habits, the closer the rapprochement with them.
Tips for getting rid
The following tips and guidelines will also help you get rid of unhealthy fears:
- If you have a distinct phobia before death, change the lifestyle in which you came to this state. Whatever this lifestyle may be. If you live in good conditions, then get out of your comfort zone and look at life from a different perspective. If life, on the contrary, is far from perfect, make every effort to make it better. It is quite possible that the previous conditions in which you lived brought you to thanatophobia.
- Be aware of the cycle. Your existence, like that of any individual, is a natural chain. No matter how original and beautiful the palace (built by the ego of each individual person) may be, all people are just bricks in the overall architectural creation of evolution. This is neither good nor bad, but simply a given (which cannot be said about obsessive fear in this regard).
- Don't isolate yourself. Excessive focus on your personality also places emphasis on your problems, which does not help get rid of your fears. It’s better to find an activity, a company or a person in which you could “dissolve” and stop thinking about a non-existent problem.
- Proceed from the fact that life is only a moment, and death is eternity. You were not alive for many, many millennia before you were born. While you were gone, millions of other people met their end. Death is no less natural than life.
- Decide what is closer to you - materialism or religion. You can find peace by choosing for yourself a clear position in relation to this: either you accept the biological nature and purpose of all living things for granted, or faith, which gives hope for the immortality of the soul, will be a support for you in a calm life.
- Don't forget about humor. Do not neglect jokes or all sorts of funny stories related to death. Black humor can smooth out a psychological problem, but only if it is not alien to you.
- Remember that you will be preserved in the minds and hearts of other people left behind. How you will remain in this world when your body leaves it depends only on you. Whether it will be a person who vegetates all his days in fear of death, or one who leaves behind a bright trail - it makes a big difference, whatever your reason for being afraid.
The worst thing about any fear is waiting for the moment when terrible events will occur. Understanding this, you will not only have fewer reasons to worry about death, but you will also have more free time for a normal existence. Also remember that there is nothing in death that life cannot do to us .
— 4 tips on how to get rid of the panic of death
__________
How to get rid of fear and anxiety?
1) Impending old age.
You will not repeat the mistakes of your grandmother, you will think in advance about providing for your old age and use your retirement for travel, new hobbies and other joys of life.
2) I'll just disappear...
It is much easier for deeply religious people: they believe that Paradise awaits them after death, since they led a righteous lifestyle.
But for doubters and non-believers it is better to learn in advance how to get rid of the fear of death, because they cannot convince themselves that after death the most important part - the soul - continues to live, which means that a person is afraid of simply disappearing, falling into oblivion.
Believe in God, reincarnation, better worlds, fairy tale lands. Figure out for yourself where your soul will go after death.
3) My life is meaningless!!!
As children, we dreamed about our adult life. We imagined that when we grew up, we would have a lot of money, a big house, a beautiful car, a family, children and other attributes of a successful person. And now we are already quite adults, but there is none of this.
And the years are passing, old age is just around the corner, etc. and so on.
If you are not yet on your deathbed, then you have a lot of time to fix everything: find a good job, get your face and figure in order, start earning decent money, start looking for your soulmate. You have the power to make your life the way you dream.
4) Who will I leave everything to?
People who have achieved a lot in life have something to lose. Fortune's favorites love life, so they are terribly afraid to say goodbye to it. What to do: Look at the problem philosophically. While you are alive, you should not think about death.
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Symptoms and signs of thanatophobia
Thanatophobia can be recognized by a number of signs. You should pay attention to his personality: anxiety, self-doubt, lack of a clear position, impressionability are often traits of a person with an obsessive fear of death.
People can react to conversations about death in different ways. Some people with a phobia stop all conversations, react painfully and aggressively, leave companies discussing the dead, avoid funerals, wakes, and mentions of dead relatives, friends, and acquaintances; even symbolism evokes hostility and negative emotions in them. Others, on the contrary, constantly discuss everything related to death and joke about this topic; their interest becomes obsessive.
Panic attacks are typical. Attacks of unexplained fear may appear suddenly. A person’s heart rate accelerates, breathing becomes rapid and shallow, the upper and, less often, the lower limbs begin to tremble, blood drains from the face and neck, severe pallor appears, sweating increases, shortness of breath occurs, and blood pressure rises. Sometimes thanatophobe may faint.
Associated phobias develop. A person is afraid of funerals, symbols, spirits, the dead, stories about them; there may be a fear of any situation that could lead to death: the patient may be afraid of drowning, falling from a great height, cutting himself, cannot stand the sight of blood, stories about illnesses.
Other deviations also arise. The sleep is shallow, and insomnia often occurs. It is difficult to fall asleep in the evening, and it can be difficult to wake up in the morning. Appetite worsens, libido decreases.