Psychology of relationships
Love is one of the deepest and brightest emotions. Almost every person will be glad to find himself in a comfortable union. Sometimes romantic relationships become such a significant element of life that they act as a source of self-realization and deep moral satisfaction.
The art of having a healthy relationship is not an innate thing. Psychological research indicates that the skill of their formation begins to develop in early childhood. The first important lessons in the psychology of love and relationships are given to us by close people. Usually these are parents or those who replace them. It is they who, by their example, show us how to behave with a partner and how to solve problems that arise. Concepts about the psychology of relationships between a couple formed in childhood do not always determine behavior for the rest of their lives, but often become its foundation.
In some cases, problems that interfere with building healthy relationships have to be worked through with a specialist. One of these dangers is codependency with an obsession with a partner. This pathological attachment kills love and respect, turning relationships into a nervous tangle of manipulation and emotional abuse. It can be difficult to admit that you have fallen into the trap of codependency, but ignoring the problem leads to the loss of yourself and the loss of the ability to enjoy life.
How to get rid of codependency in a relationship
Failures in a couple arise for many reasons and entail deep melancholy and psychological problems. We must consciously work on ourselves and our relationships with our partners to allow family life to flourish.
The psychology of relationships between a man and a woman is a very changeable and complex area. We are all different, and when it comes to love and family, it is necessary to understand that there is no universal recipe for correct behavior. Each person, man or woman, has its own characteristics that must be taken into account. At the same time, research shows that there are also typical behavior patterns. Therefore, today we will turn to the results of these studies and look at the important points in more detail.
Psychology of family relationships
Few things give such a feeling of security, happiness and love as good family relationships. Of course, feeling part of a warm and loving family is nice in itself. But healthy relationships within the family are important for other reasons:
- make children feel safe and give them the skills to create healthy relationships in the future
- trust and mutual support help to endure financial and other life difficulties easier and more successfully
- It has been proven that a favorable atmosphere in the family contributes to more successful business and increases the efficiency of study
- support from loved ones allows you to more successfully experience stress and cope with illnesses, both somatic and mental
That is why it is always worth paying close attention to such an important thing as the psychology of family relationships between wife and husband. Unfortunately, in an effort to make our life as a couple more comfortable, we often make mistakes that lead to deterioration in relationships. What are these errors?
- Jealousy and excessive control of a partner. Research into marriage psychology tells us that a lack of trust gradually lowers your self-esteem and leads to a loss of respect from your spouse.
- Lack of personal space. The desire to participate in all areas of a partner’s life leads to a gradual fading of interest and accumulation of irritation. Sometimes you need a breath of fresh air, which can be your personal hobby or meeting with friends.
- Constant manipulation: a dissatisfied look, offensive hints, blackmail with sex or anything else to get what you want. Try to abandon these destructive methods and act openly. A sincere conversation with your spouse will show you how much easier and more enjoyable your life together will be.
- Lack of tolerance: if partners cling to every little detail and get irritated by the slightest mistakes, then such a relationship will not lead to good things. Try to restrain your emotions and in most cases you will see that the incident was not worth the quarrel.
When discussing the problems of family life, one cannot help but mention betrayal. People put different meanings into this word, but every time such situations lead to severe mental pain. In the confusion of feelings, impulses to take revenge and destroy everything around appear, but maybe it’s worth looking for another way? A painful breakup is not the only outcome. If you want to save your family, you can always try to restore the relationship.
How to survive betrayal and save your family
Try not to forget about the pitfalls in the psychology of relationships between spouses that poison family life. Each of us makes mistakes from time to time, but there is nothing wrong with that. The main thing is to recognize them in time and prevent the consequences.
Individuality of a person
Read more: History of the study of individuality in Russian psychology
Introduction
Currently, the problem of studying human individuality is one of the central topics of theoretical and applied research in psychology.
The relevance of the topic is determined by the emergence of a whole complex of methodological and conceptual issues already at the stage of problem formulation. Today, the most significant, but far from being resolved, seem to be the following problems:
— integration of interdisciplinary research aimed at studying the individual identity of the individual;
— application of the principles of a systematic approach to the study of the specifics of individuality;
- the relationship between the biological and the social in the structure of individuality, “external” and “internal”, objective and subjective, etc.
Social practice currently poses the task of developing human individuality as a priority direction in the system of preschool, secondary, secondary vocational and higher education.
Solving many applied psychological problems requires knowledge of the characteristics of individuality, reliable diagnosis and assessment of its properties as an integral system - ultimately, it is understanding the individuality of a child and an adult that underlies successful training and education, career guidance and selection, effective psychotherapy, etc.
The study of individuality in psychology has a long history. Many sciences claim a monopoly on the study of individuality, but a narrow approach to the study of individual differences prevents the integration of knowledge about the patterns of individuality formation.
Today, the most adequate strategy for studying individuality is to use the principles of a systems approach.
The problem of systematic research of individuality is considered in the works of V.V. Belous (1982, 1989, 1996, 2000), E.A. Golubeva (1983), M.S. Egorova (1995, 1997), A.I. Krupnova (1983, 1987), I.V. Ravich-Scherbo (1999), V.M. Rusalova (1982, 1985, 1986, 1989), T.F. Bazylevich (1998, 1999, 2000), O.A. Akhverdova (1998), I.V. Boeva (2000), V.A. Barabanshchikova (1997, 2000, 2003) and others.
Within the framework of the systems approach, developing wholes are studied, as a rule, while the phenomena being studied are considered as multisystem. This approach opens up the possibility of studying the conditions for the development of a subject in its relationship with other systemic entities. The system concept opposes the ideas of linear determinism, allowing a more differentiated approach to solving a number of fundamental problems of psychology and emphasizing the dimensions of determination processes that are not always distinguished: dynamism, nonlinearity and mediation.
Modern research within the framework of general psychology and personality psychology is characterized by an emphasis on the integrativeness and integrity of mental phenomena. This trend is associated with the strengthening of the subjective approach to the analysis of the psyche (S.L. Rubinshtein, D.N. Uznadze).
Chapter 1. History of the problem of studying individuality in psychology
1.1 History of the study of individuality in foreign psychology
Interest in the problem of individual differences can be traced already in the works of ancient Greek and Roman philosophers and doctors (Hippocrates, Theophrastus, Galen). Researchers of that time were mainly interested in the question of the relationship between the psyche and anatomical and biological characteristics of a person. Almost until the second half of the 19th century, ideas about the individual uniqueness of a person were speculative reasoning based on everyday observations or medical practice. Later, due to the introduction of experiment into psychology and changes in its methodological foundations, research on individual differences becomes more fundamental and evidence-based. A separate area of psychological knowledge is emerging that deals with the study of individual differences in people—differential psychology. Modern science owes its origins to Western European scientists, primarily to the Englishman Sir Francis Galton, the French explorer Alfred Binet, and the German psychologist William Stern.
The beginning of the scientific study of individuality is associated, first of all, with the names of the English scientist Francis Galton and the German William Stern.
F. Galton was the first to make individual differences between people a special subject of study, created measurement procedures and the initial statistical apparatus for assessing differences, collected a large amount of experimental material about different levels in the structure of individuality, and raised the question of the origin of individual characteristics.
W. Stern, a student of G. Ebbinghaus, in 1900 in the book “On the psychology of individual differences (ideas for differential psychology)” first introduced the term “differential psychology” to designate a new field, “emancipated,” in his words, from the mother science - general psychology. The book was subsequently republished in 1911, 1921 and 1994. entitled “Differential psychology in its methodological foundations.” In the preface to the 1994 edition, A. Anastasi called it “a book of epoch-making significance,” and the prominent German researcher K. Pavlik called it “a guide for psychological science.” V. Stern was the first to introduce the concept of differential psychology, formulate methodological and experimental-methodological approaches, basic concepts, and many statistical techniques, some of which are still valid today.
Of course, the real existence of individual psychological characteristics and their significance in life stimulated the study of them from a variety of angles - within the framework of “characterology”, “ethology”, “special psychology”, “individual psychology”, etc. Clinical works by E. Kraepelin (1856-1921), works by A. Binet (1857-1912) and others appeared. Somewhat later, the work of G.I. Rossolimo (1860-1928) “Psychological Profiles,” which provides a comprehensive description of personality, and many other works.
The real existence of individual psychological characteristics and their significance in life have stimulated their study from a variety of angles.
Two more branches of science were taking shape, without which differential psychology could not have developed: psychological diagnostics (testology) and statistics.
Thus, in the first decades of the twentieth century, differential psychology was fully formed as an independent field of knowledge. However, in subsequent years, the problem of individuality was either brought to the forefront of science, or denied altogether.
J. Hirsch figuratively describes this situation: “Experimental psychological studies of psychological differences are reminiscent of Hamlet’s “To be or not to be...” J. Cattell studied them, Watson buried them, Triton emphasized their importance, Halp minimized their significance for theory, Hunter was brought into the picture by them. bewilderment, Skinner and his colleagues were led into an intellectual dead end, and the authors of formal models preferred to record elementary sophisms rather than knowledge about them...”
M.S. Egorova identifies the following sequence of works that led to the formation of a new branch of psychology: F. Galton developed experimental techniques to study individual differences in the perception of colors, the weight of objects and the speed of reaction to various stimuli, which became the first tests of mental development. Later, A. Binet created a set of techniques for diagnosing memory, imagination, attention and other complex mental processes. V. Stern analyzed and generalized the knowledge about individual psychological differences available at the beginning of the 20th century and developed a methodological basis for a new psychological branch called “differential psychology”; in the domestic literature of the early 20th century it was designated as “individual psychology” [13].
A. Anastasi, M.S. Egorova, K. Cooper, T.D. Martsinkovskaya, K.S. Hall, G. Lindsay, L. Kjell, D. Ziegler, D.P. Schultz, M.G. Yaroshevsky and other psychologists and historians of science in their studies analyzed in detail the formation of foreign differential psychology and outlined the range of problems it developed[22].
Read more: History of the study of individuality in Russian psychology
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Psychology of a man in a relationship with his wife
We all know that men are different from women not only physically, but also emotionally. These differences are visible at any stage of life and affect all aspects of life, including behavior in relationships and marriage. It is generally believed that the role of provider and protector is the natural role of a man. And although in the modern world this model of behavior has long become not very clear and not always mandatory, most men adhere to it in their own way. This is not surprising, because the mentality has been formed over hundreds of years, and, despite the benefits of civilization, you cannot get rid of it so easily.
Women, on the one hand, like the “warrior” personality, but on the other, they often complain about their partner’s lack of receptivity and sensitivity. For a long time, one of the distinguishing characteristics of men was the ability to resolve conflicts physically, while women needed to be attentive to external manifestations of emotions.
This in no way means that a modern man will fight for any reason or take something away. This only reminds us that empathy and sensitivity to hints in men has always been less developed than in women. The latter are much more skillful at interpreting facial expressions and other nuances of communication, while a man simply will not pay attention to them. Not because it doesn’t matter to him, it’s just that his psyche is structured differently.
However, it is important to see the line when the natural characteristics of the male psyche turn into emotional abuse. Such harmful relationships can last for years, and prolonged pressure on the nervous system does not leave without losses. If “vampirism” is not resisted, the victim inevitably loses self-esteem and plunges into depression.
What is a toxic relationship
Thus, the psychology of a man’s relationship with a woman is rooted in the distant past. Fortunately, modernity has made it possible to smooth out all these nuances and leave some things behind altogether, but we should not forget about the peculiarities of the male psyche. Here are some simple tips to help a man add positive emotions to his relationship:
- Don't skimp on compliments.
- Take an interest in her affairs, do not refuse to talk about topics that interest her.
- Show concern not only in global issues, but also in small things.
- Don't get carried away with total control of her life.
36. Psychology of interpersonal relationships
Interpersonal relationships -
This is a set of connections that develop between people in the form of feelings, judgments and appeals to each other.
Interpersonal relationships include:
1) people’s perception and understanding of each other;
2) interpersonal attractiveness (attraction and sympathy);
3) interaction and behavior (in particular, role-playing).
Components of interpersonal relationships:
1) cognitive component –
includes all cognitive mental processes: sensations, perception, representation, memory, thinking, imagination. Thanks to this component, knowledge of the individual psychological characteristics of partners in joint activities and mutual understanding between people occurs. The characteristics of mutual understanding are:
a) adequacy - the accuracy of the mental reflection of the perceived personality;
b) identification – identification by an individual of his personality with the personality of another individual;
2) emotional component -
includes positive or negative experiences that a person has during interpersonal communication with other people:
a) likes or dislikes;
b) satisfaction with oneself, partner, work, etc.;
c) empathy - an emotional response to the experiences of another person, which can manifest itself in the form of empathy (experience of the feelings that another experiences), sympathy (personal attitude towards the experiences of another) and complicity (empathy accompanied by assistance);
3) behavioral component
– includes facial expressions, gestures, pantomimes, speech and actions that express the relationship of a given person to other people, to the group as a whole. He plays a leading role in regulating relationships.
The effectiveness of interpersonal relationships is assessed by the state of satisfaction and dissatisfaction of the group and its members.
Types of interpersonal relationships:
1) industrial relations –
develop between employees of organizations when solving production, educational, economic, everyday and other problems and imply fixed rules of behavior of employees in relation to each other. Divided into relationships:
a) vertically – between managers and subordinates;
b) horizontally – relations between employees who have the same status;
c) diagonally - the relationship between the managers of one production unit and ordinary employees of another;
2) everyday relationships
– develop outside of work, on vacation and at home;
3) formal (official) relations –
normatively provided relationships enshrined in official documents;
4) informal (unofficial) relationships
- relationships that actually develop in relationships between people and are manifested in preferences, likes or dislikes, mutual assessments, authority, etc.
The nature of interpersonal relationships is influenced by such personal characteristics as gender, nationality, age, temperament, health status, profession, experience of communicating with people, self-esteem, need for communication, etc.
Stages of development of interpersonal relationships:
1) stage of acquaintance - the first stage - the emergence of mutual contact, mutual perception and evaluation of each other by people, which largely determines the nature of the relationship between them;
Psychology bookap
2) the stage of friendly relations - the emergence of interpersonal relationships, the formation of the internal attitude of people towards each other on the rational (awareness by interacting people of each other’s advantages and disadvantages) and emotional levels (the emergence of corresponding experiences, emotional response, etc.);
3) companionship - bringing together views and providing support to each other, characterized by trust.
Women's psychology in relationships with husbands
Women fantasize in advance about what they want from marriage. Their expectations are more specific than those of men, which is why they are more often disappointed. They expect deep affection, tenderness, romance and comfort from marriage.
Women generally think about marriage more often than men think about marriage. Some are worried why they have been together for several years, but there is still no proposal. Believe me, it's not always that your man doesn't love you. There could be many reasons, for example, he simply didn’t think about the fact that this was important to you.
Why men don't want to get married
The psychology of a woman’s relationship with a man is that she strives to give him her love, beauty and care the way she dreamed of it before marriage. In return, they expect support and attention, the absence of which they feel very subtly. Women are more likely than men to unnecessarily stress themselves out without good reason and, in an attempt to improve the situation, resort to manipulation. In reality, everything can be resolved much simpler. Family life will become more enjoyable if the fair sex does not forget about the following tips:
- Discuss problems and experiences directly and openly, start with the main thing.
- Praise your man deservedly.
- Think about what exactly attracts your partner to you, and redirect your energy there.
- Don't hold back negative emotions, tell your partner about your feelings.
In any case, relationships will bring us both joy and problems. All people are different, everyone has their own personality traits, both pleasant and not so pleasant. A husband and wife are two different parts of one whole. Working on yourself and being willing to meet your loved one halfway will help you avoid mistakes and unnecessary quarrels, but will give you a strong and happy relationship.
