1 186 July 25, 2020 at 08:58 Author of the publication: Natalya Tkachenko
I once had a frank conversation with my ex-husband. Now I understand that if we could talk like that when we were married, most likely we would not have become exes (but that’s another story). One of the topics raised in the conversation was the topic of being ignored. I ignored him, and very harshly - I could not talk to him for weeks.
I became interested in how a man feels when a woman ignores him, and he wondered why I did this.
From this conversation this article was born.
What is ignore
Ignoring comes in several forms:
- lack of response to messages on social networks;
- ignore calls;
- avoidance during personal meetings on the street or in other public places.
It is extremely unpleasant to realize that a person does not want to continue communication and is doing everything to avoid contact, even though previously it was possible to spend time together and receive exciting emotions. Unfortunately, not all stories have a happy ending, because life is far from a fairy tale.
Before you cut ties, it's best to consider whether it's worth it. Perhaps it’s not too late to fix everything, find a compromise and at least occasionally maintain communication.
Can a man love and ignore?
A man is often inclined to outwardly ignore the feelings and experiences of his beloved woman/girlfriend, despite the fact that he feels affection for her. Perhaps this behavior of many men is due to the fact that they do not know how (or do not want) to express their feelings outwardly. But often ignoring occurs for very specific reasons. Women often wonder if a man can love and ignore at the same time, and the answer to this question can be found below.
Men strive to win the attention and sympathy of the woman they like, but after this they can behave very distantly, even coldly. A girl can observe such behavior from a man almost from the beginning of their acquaintance. Although there are examples of couples with short communication experience, where men behave as if they do not notice their companion. Why does romance on the male side have such strange consequences? Men have their own reasons for this.
A woman may not understand the true reasons for her man's behavior, but a loving woman will always try to talk about living together with her partner. Communication and trust are the surest way to save a relationship.
Source: Can a man love and ignore? A man is often inclined to outwardly ignore the feelings and experiences of his beloved woman/girlfriend, despite the fact that he feels affection for her. Perhaps this behavior of many men is associated with https://womanadvice.ru/mozhet-li-muzhchina-lyubit-i-ignorirovat
After a quarrel
People begin to ignore a girl or guy in cases where a scandal has occurred and the relationship has collapsed forever. If your significant other has done terrible things, you should try to understand and put yourself in the place of the guilty person. Even if it is impossible to maintain at least some kind of relationship after something like this, you should not harbor anger and resentment until the end of your days, because this will not lead to anything good. Everything comes back like a boomerang, you need to be able to forgive and then they will be able to forgive you too. After the breakup
The breakdown of relationships occurs not only due to infidelity and numerous quarrels. Sometimes relationships begin spontaneously and quickly, which can, after a short period of time, lead to the question of how to start ignoring a girl. To make a person fall in love with you, you can resort to different methods, all methods are good, but you need to break up carefully. It’s better to do this delicately and not spoil your opinion of yourself even more.
In principle, the path of ignoring in this matter cannot be correct. It is much better to simply talk to the person and try to explain to him that a mistake was made. In order not to aggravate the situation, it is better to break up immediately before it goes too far.
Of course, you need to forgive, but there are situations when the line is crossed and you need to immediately burn all bridges. People can cross all acceptable boundaries and take advantage of those who love them, even if a person is ready to do everything for his chosen one free of charge. The hardest thing for guys is trying to figure out how to ignore the girl they love. For most of them, a friend is a loved one, for whose sake they are ready to go to any lengths.
However, when that very line has already been crossed, you need to act. You shouldn’t delay everything until marriage and children, because then breaking off the relationship will be even more difficult and painful. Not only the spouses will suffer, but also the child, whose psyche is already very vulnerable. Such a blow can forever leave a bleeding wound in the baby’s heart.
Why is the girl ignoring you?
You meet a girl on the street, take her phone number. You think you have her on the hook. But the girl doesn’t answer the phone call, she doesn’t give a damn about your SMS. Why is this so? It seemed like we had a normal conversation, she dictated the phone number without further ado. But there is no contact.
Reason #1. You don't interest her.
Here is a list of mistakes that you could make when meeting, and because of which the young lady ignores you:
— The girl was bored talking to you, you said banal phrases. You couldn't make the girl laugh.
“You spoke to the girl from below.”
- You asked her for her phone number, and she gave it to you, stupidly so that you would leave behind.
— Immediately after meeting you, you wrote to the girl something like “You are truly a goddess!” I really want to see you again!”
What to do and how to fix everything? You can, of course, write a message that will somehow hook her or, if possible, try to meet again. But, to be honest, it’s better not to worry about this particular girl in such a situation, because most likely the train has left. It’s better to analyze all your mistakes with other girls.
A girl you know can also lose interest in you. Why a girl ignores - there can be a lot of reasons. I wrote some of them in the article “”, be sure to read it. What to do in this case, and how to make a girl attracted to you, read a little below.
Reason #2. You offended the girl.
Girls are very emotional, so it’s easy to offend her. Of course, there are also “men in skirts,” to put it simply, who will offend anyone they want, but still all women are very touchy. There is even an expression: “You take offense like a woman.” Therefore, if you notice that a girl is ignoring you, then resentment may well be the reason.
A relationship is not a relationship without quarrels and contradictions. It’s good if we had a fight, defused the situation and came to a common opinion. But it often happens that during a quarrel the girl “leave the game”, locks herself in the room and gets offended. When the heat subsides, you try to talk to her, but she does not respond to you. He is stupidly silent, or shouts out short phrases like “Yes”, “No”.
Remember carefully why she could be offended. If the reason is serious enough, then approach her and apologize. Clear, short and without any snot. A real man should be able to apologize, but not for every trifle, but when there really is a reason for it. I am amazed by people who begin to ask for forgiveness through some acquaintances or through VKontakte groups. He messed up himself, he came up and apologized. By the way, if the reason is not serious or does not exist at all, for example, the girl is simply in a bad mood, or you called her favorite actress ugly, then there is no need to apologize. And if you start asking for forgiveness over trifles, you will become a doormat, and the woman will be offended more and more often.
Well, it’s good when you know the reason for her offense. But it also happens that you have no idea what came over her. An hour ago your girlfriend was cheerful, flirting with you, and then someone called her, and that’s it... She doesn’t talk to you. Common situation?
Everything is more complicated here. But you don't have to fall to your knees right away. Go up and firmly ask her why she is ignoring you, and tell her that if she doesn’t tell you the reason, then you won’t make peace. If he calls you, then you need to do as written above; if not, then you need to act carefully and not make mistakes. You can read about this below.
Reason #3. Ignoring is a game.
Girls love to give men various types of tests. How he will react to the whims of a woman and what he will do. And one of these checks may be ignoring. This is a women's game; she suddenly cools off towards the man, stops noticing him, demonstrates a loss of interest and watches what he will begin to do. The girl's expectation - she apologizes, starts to creep under her, reality - gives gifts, apologizes, starts to creep under her. I apologize for the tautology, but often this is exactly what happens as the woman planned. This is how henpecked people are born in relationships.
How to properly ignore a girl
Under any circumstances, there is no need to offend a person and try to tell him the most offensive words that you can think of. It’s better to do everything loyally and delicately. If a guy thinks about how to properly ignore a girl, then he is most likely a good person who does not want to hurt others. This is especially true if he decided to make a girl fall in love with him when she was in a relationship. This is an ugly act, and it will be difficult for your ex-other half after the breakup. You need to understand this. Simply by putting yourself in her shoes, you can understand what words are best to say and what should not be said.
Where to start getting a girl back
So the girl, ignoring you, does the same. She gets what she needs. Don't think that girls are bad and you are good. Guys do this too.
The girl ignores you while in a relationship with you
- She needs something from you - attention, gifts, fulfillment of her request. This just comes from childhood. The desire to be capricious.
- This is how she shows resentment if you quarrel - in this situation the girl raises her importance. She calms your ego, waits for an apology in order to feel that you need her.
We suggest you read: How to calm down and stop being nervous about anything
Girl ignores after meeting
- She is not interested in communicating with you - most likely she is not interested in you. Even if she gave you the number, this is not an indicator. Any normal girl has options with whom she can spend her time.
- She doesn't ignore you all the time, but she doesn't take the initiative. It's much easier here. She might like you, but she doesn't show interest on purpose.
- Because of fear, past experience, upbringing. The rule in relationships is that the one who cares less controls the relationship.
How to protect yourself from an abuser
There are situations when a girl herself will not write again, but demands royal treatment. She can use a person who loves her and at the same time feel comfortable, without succumbing to remorse, which, apparently, does not exist. A woman who behaves this way should not be ignored, but driven as far as possible. In this scenario, you need to express everything to her face or exclude what she, in the guy’s opinion, is keeping him with her for. When his guesses are correct, she herself will not write again. If he was wrong, then the relationship will be saved and a terrible mistake will be prevented. How to stand up for yourself
Sometimes everything reaches the point of absurdity, a representative of the fair sex behaves so horribly that the guy even likes to ignore her, because now there is no person in his life who regularly gives him reasons to become depressed.
Girls are different, you shouldn’t equate them all with nice ladies leading a righteous lifestyle. Some young ladies cause so much pain that after such “happiness” a person does not really want to live.
In order not to bring the situation to absurd conclusions, it is better to stand up for yourself in time and break off the relationship. You shouldn’t do this by causing scandals and hysterics, you need to talk calmly, explain the reasons why such a decision was made, and part ways with the world. After this, the guy will unconsciously wonder whether it is worth pursuing such a girl or whether it is better to find a better candidate.
How can a man properly ignore a woman he likes?
It is important to understand that women usually use ignoring specifically for something; it has a specific goal that your interlocutor wants to achieve. So what are the options? Perhaps this is how a woman expresses resentment, wants revenge, or hopes to end your relationship. As soon as you fully understand why a woman behaves this way, something else will become clear to you - how to act in such a difficult matter.
However, do not rule out the possibility that this person is not only ignoring you. Some women get tired of problems or uncertainty in their personal lives, after which they decide to take some kind of break - that is, to distance themselves from any personal contacts with men. In this case, you should act delicately, show your chosen one that you are ready to wait and understand the reasons for her fears.
If we are talking about an adult woman, then it is possible that she is tired of any correspondence and “virtual love”. Try to transfer your courtship into real life, and act like that. The older a woman is, the less time she usually wants to spend on correspondence, which in many cases simply ends in nothing. Show your readiness for a real relationship.
Tips and warnings
You shouldn’t cut your teeth; it’s better to approach the problem carefully. There is no need to say that the person with whom you had to share a bed for a long time ruined your life and brought only troubles and disappointments. Your partner is a voluntary choice; your future soul mate does not hit on the first person you meet on the street and does not beg him to go on a date with her.
Whatever happens, it is better to forgive. The ability to forgive is the main human skill. Revenge is the worst thing you can resort to. After a breakup, you don’t need to go back to work or completely abandon your personal life; you should try to come to your senses and continue to develop, move along your own path. To achieve material goals, a person is capable of resorting to vile and base actions, including breaking off relationships. If it occurs to you to take this path, then it is important to remember that even all the money in the world cannot replace heaven.
Bottom line
If a girl ignores you, and you have made every possible attempt to contact her, then it’s probably time to think about the fact that she is not the only one on the entire planet. See other girls you can hook up with and start a relationship with. As a result, you may come across a nicer girl than the one who turns her nose up.
Only you can choose who and what to spend your time on. If a girl ignores you, maybe you just shouldn’t waste your time on her?
One of the most common reasons why a girl ignores you is that she is already tired of you with your calls and SMS. We men are designed in such a way that if we have a potential girlfriend, we would rather have her become completely ours, and to confirm this we need her calls and SMS. Since she doesn’t write herself, for example, you start texting her.
Just imagine, she’s really sitting at work, she’s busy, and you start texting her every five minutes, it distracts her, and she might even get a stick from her boss. There is such a well-known principle, and it really works - “The less we love a woman, the more she likes us,” you’ve probably heard about it.
The girl doesn't pick up the phone because you bothered her with your excessive attention. As soon as you begin to behave annoyingly towards her, she understands that her importance to you is very great and you are deeply in love, but she is not interested in a man who is completely dependent on her attention (This means that he has nothing else to do), from her answering calls. She is not interested in the man who is at her feet.
By the way, I have a lot on this topic that you can get right now by clicking. In these videos I cover this topic in more detail. I don’t really like to write on a blog, I’m still a lazy person, it’s easier for me to talk on camera ;). So, it’s better not to read me.
Actually, that’s why (because guys are annoying) many girls are afraid to just give out their phone numbers. And girls often tell me this expression: “He and I haven’t even gone on a first date yet, but he’s already bothered me with his attention.” There is no need to do this, it is better, on the contrary, to disappear and not call or write, let her have a desire to contact you.
I teach my students this rule: If a girl doesn’t pick up the phone when you call her, then you need to call no more than twice a day. I called during the day, then called in the evening. If she doesn’t pick up, then she can always call back, and if she doesn’t call back, that’s it. Don't call her again. Well, as a last resort, you can call tomorrow afternoon, but this is already too much. Never force yourself on women.
You can, of course, track her down and wait for her at the house where she lives, go up and attack her))) Just kidding)))). Talk to her honestly, just tell her what you feel, only without humiliation, from the position of “Above” and ask what’s the matter, let her answer you just as frankly.
Also, if a girl doesn’t pick up the phone, there is a great way to forget her, I already described it in the article, it’s called T10D. Fuck 10 Others))))). Sometimes you really need to admit that you have failed (not to give up right away, of course, but you need to feel when the situation can no longer be changed), and just switch to looking for another girl. Oddly enough, this T10D rule really works, and not even on the tenth girl, but literally on the second or third.
And the best way to let go of a girl who has been ignoring you for a long time and if the girl is not paying attention is, of course, to undergo training in seduction and pickup, it will generally close your question related to women once and for all. There will be so many of them that all you have to do is choose and that’s it.
It often happens that girls stop calling or don’t make contact at all, after they decide that you are only suitable as a friend or that they are no longer interested in you at all. For example, you made a good impression on her, and then you just took her from the “Bottom” position.
First date, you’re not her (and she’s waiting for you to start kissing and hugging her), You’re afraid of ruining everything, what if she gets lost if I let my hands go (Especially since the girl will always say that it’s too early and she’s not ready yet) , then the second date, the third, the fourth, and she finally loses interest in you, because you behave like a friend, but not like a man.
And it eventually merges, and then you walk around and suffer. Although only You and your indecision and timidity are to blame. Therefore, it is better to go too far than to go too far.
Instead of tormenting yourself with the question why the girl ignores me (Ras is ignoring me, which means you’ve most likely ruined everything, and it’s very difficult to fix here, it’s not plasticine, but either disinterest), think about what exactly you could have done wrong and promise yourself not to make more of these mistakes in the future. And the main reasons again:
- , even better than this one, fortunately there are a lot of them walking along the street.
Yes, and if the girl doesn’t pick up the phone, then you just write her an SMS with the text - hello, this is (Name), I have an excellent and cool offer for you (Think of where you would invite her), call me back when you are free. After this, there should not be a single call from you, and there should not be any SMS. If she doesn't call back or doesn't write anything back - Just forget about her!
Not all guys can easily tolerate being ignored by a girl. Only experienced seducers who have encountered more than a dozen refusals can continue to act with the same confidence in the future, showing persistence towards this or other girls. Such immunity does not develop in one month.
But we can influence the very reasons for ignoring her, and also begin to behave more attractively in order to arouse her interest.
Now I will tell you what to do if a girl ignores you.
But first of all, I would like to make sure that you are aware of your mistakes (which led to this “result”).
Why do girls ignore guys?
The main (and only) reason girls ignore is lack of interest.
Beautiful myths about great male perseverance, in which a man pursues a girl for years, and then they “live happily ever after,” have long been dispelled. And those who continue to believe in this are simply wasting their time.
You need to understand that if there is no interest at the very beginning, then you are to blame for this, and not the small number of dates or her mood. And persistence has nothing to do with it either.
Typically unattractive behavior from guys looks like this:
When they meet, they behave unattractively. Seeing a lack of interest, they show persistence, which often develops into neediness in the style of “Well, give me a number!” Of course, few people say this, but the general mental message has exactly this essence.
Immediately after meeting, they show uncertainty. For example, they write: “It was nice to meet you. Vasya” - by saying their name at the end, they show uncertainty that she remembered them. Or to the question “who is this?”, they simply answer with the name: “Vasya.” This is also not the best move - it would be more interesting if they wrote, for example: “The best guy in your life.”
When a girl loses interest (and she is guaranteed to start losing it because of the mistakes they make), they show even more neediness and insecurity by bombarding her with texts and calls. They also flash before her eyes, try to catch her gaze, and so on. This leads to a final loss of desire.
If they have some kind of relationship with a girl, and they make mistakes, then this leads to cheating, the phrases “let’s remain friends” and even greater indifference.
What to do if a girl ignores you?
First of all, you need to understand what your mistakes were. Was there anything from the list above that was present in your behavior too? Or maybe there was nothing on this list, but you still intuitively felt that you had made similar mistakes somewhere?
If you manage to overcome her ignoring her by using any technique, then this will change little: leaving the roots of the problems to yourself, you will soon again be faced with loss of desire and another period called “total ignore”.
Is correcting your own mistakes every time a relationship? Hardly.
It is much more effective to immediately correct the flaws in behavior that prevent you from starting to seduce normally. In some cases, there is no point in focusing on one girl (with whom you didn’t even have a relationship), but it is better to switch to others, developing your skills.
Remember this!
However, I will still tell you about methods of resisting being ignored.
What to do if a girl ignores: 3 techniques
Method No. 1. Counter-ignoring.
It works on the principle “I don’t care!”
If you understand that she has lost interest in you, although you yourself are confident in your kindness, sensitivity, sense of humor and other useful qualities, then you begin to behave the same way as she does.
She walks by and doesn't say hello, pretending not to notice you?
The first time she just thinks. In the second, he will begin to worry and doubt his own attractiveness. In the third, she will understand that she behaved incorrectly and will try to do something to attract your attention.
An important point: if she starts to say hello herself, then it is advisable for you to simply say hello with slightly feigned friendliness (!) and move on.
Because in 95% of cases, a girl’s first actions are just a test of how “introduced” you are to external circumstances and are able to “keep your mark.”
It almost always works. But it works especially well when at the very beginning the girl talked to you normally, and only then began to ignore you.
The method is based on the so-called “swing”, when in one period of time you treat her well, show initiative, make her laugh, and so on. And in the other, you behave very coldly (as if she is your friend who tries to borrow money from you every day :)), you do not initiate communication and respond without enthusiasm to her attempts to start it.
What I mean?
In general, “closer-farther” is a natural strategy for women, thanks to which they manage to tie guys to themselves and send them to an alternate airfield. And they have their own idea of when to go “closer” and when to do “further” (in relation to you, of course).
It will be better if you do “further” when, according to her logic, it should be “closer”. When she understands that the time for “further” has not yet come, but you act indifferent, then she begins to think. Think long and painfully, trying to understand what the reason is.
This is good for you and me.
However, at the very beginning you will still have to do “further” precisely in response to her ignoring her. And only then, when interest returns a little, will you start playing your game.
Method No. 3. Friendly banter.
It can be used both at the very beginning (ignoring during or after acquaintance) and during the dating period.
It works to increase your attractiveness (a guy who can easily make fun of a girl is considered confident, selective, and also charming).
You can joke about anything: starting with her appearance (you can invent non-existent flaws: “Your nose moves so funny when you talk! Look - again! ”), ending with her behavior.
The main thing in banter is your confidence that you have the right to joke about her. If you don’t have this confidence, then it’s better to use the two previous techniques. Otherwise, she will perceive it as a pathetic attempt to attract her attention.
These 3 simple tricks almost always work. But remember: there is no point in doing anything if a girl ignores you until you understand what real attraction means and how it is formed. Otherwise, you will always be ignored and correct your own mistakes.
The article discusses issues related to women and their complete ignoring of men, and also gives advice on how to avoid such a situation. Express your opinion in the comments.
If a girl ignores messages, what does it mean, because I love her
Either she is offended or she is not interested in you.
The girl ignores after a quarrel and by SMS, what to do and how to write an apology in contact and beg for forgiveness
The situation needs to be corrected urgently. Correctly noted, this requires begging for forgiveness.
Write in such a way that it is obvious that you repent of what you did. Promise not to repeat your mistakes again.
A woman ignores another woman, why and how to do it
Ignores, which means she doesn’t want to communicate. First you need to find out the reason, if it is an insult, try to correct the situation, write an SMS, explain yourself.
If she just doesn’t want to communicate, then there’s no point in doing anything.
Why does a woman ignore and avoid the man she likes and his calls, psychology
Perhaps they told her something about the man. There must be a reason for this behavior, try to understand the situation, talk with close friends, they should be aware of the events.
The girl ignores without explaining anything and does not want a relationship, but does not let go and does not remove her from friends and does not talk, although we did not quarrel
This behavior indicates her resentment. Or maybe it’s about a third person, maybe another man has appeared in her life, she can’t make up her mind and choose between you.
Why does a girl ignore her ex-boyfriend's questions?
For her, the past is in the past. She doesn't want to communicate with him.
The girl ignores my requests and compliments in public and at work for no reason, and then she makes contact herself
Maybe she is embarrassed by you or her self-esteem is not very high. In principle, she is embarrassed to show her relationship in public, considering it personal and intimate.
Why does a girl ignore after the first meeting, avoid communication, how to behave and make her at least a friend
Disappear from her life for a while. If you impose yourself and your communication, she will not want to see you at all. It won't be long before she looks at you from a different perspective.
Why does a girl ignore a declaration of love, and how to correct the situation, or is she doing everything on purpose?
Alternatively, he can do it on purpose. Thus showing your character. If at the same time she communicates with you perfectly, stop declaring your love, wait a little.