How to recognize a psycho in your neighbor
| Still from the cartoon “Baby and Carlson” |
Probably everyone at least once in their life asked themselves the question: “Am I crazy, or is the world crazy?” For example, I began to have doubts about my own normality after reading an interesting brochure on psychiatry.
The first sign of schizophrenia, the brochure said, is this: you go out of your house into the street and suddenly notice that those around you are looking at you strangely. And indeed, sometimes this happens. And you look at your neighbors or some of your acquaintances - and you immediately understand: these are the crazy ones! Therefore, I decided to find out from psychiatrists and psychologists how to distinguish a mentally normal person from a mentally ill person? Or maybe it’s time for me to see a doctor myself?
The consultations immediately took a casual turn. Psychologist Mark Sandomirsky reassured: “A mentally ill person never doubts that he is healthy.” I perked up. But that was not the case - psychiatrist Mikhail Vinogradov made the opposite statement: “If a person has any doubts that he is normal, it is time for him to see a psychiatrist. The thesis that a mentally ill person considers himself healthy is a common misconception. Patients are different. Some people consider themselves healthy, while others, on the contrary, immediately run to a psychiatrist.”
According to Vinogradov, only a specialist can recognize a mentally ill person. Someone who appears to be a violent mental patient may actually be an ill-mannered bully, he says. So, judging only by external signs, “it’s time for us all to be hospitalized.”
Or maybe it’s really time? But no, Sandomirsky assures. To be truly abnormal, you must have, for example, “impaired hearing or vision.” That is, experiencing auditory and other hallucinations. “So I’m normal!” – I breathed out a sigh of relief. And again I was wrong - psychiatry classifies all types of communication with higher powers as hallucinations. You prayed and think that God heard you - this, my friend, is a complete clinic. At least, that's what science thinks.
How else to distinguish normal from abnormal? According to Mark Sandomirsky, the criterion of success is decisive in this matter: “If a person achieves something in life, he is normal. If fatally unsuccessful, then sick.”
A person suffering from depression for two years is unlikely to succeed in anything, says Sandomirsky. But even here, not everything is so simple. Several years ago I had the opportunity to communicate with a psychiatrist from the Center. Serbsky, who said: “All talented people - writers, artists, and so on - are sick with severe forms of psychopathy. They achieve success due to the fact that, due to illness, they strive in every possible way to attract the attention of others.” Society admires them, but in vain - the disease will still take its toll, the psychiatrist assured me. The psyche will fall apart, and the star will run to hide somewhere in a secluded hole, away from prying eyes.
I got the feeling that he was just jealous. Sandomirsky also disagrees with the psychiatrist: “Even if a successful person relapses, he still has a greater margin of safety than someone who has vegetated in poverty all his life.” Including a margin of mental strength.
In a word, there are as many opinions as there are psychiatrists. From communicating with them, I drew the following conclusions: there are not many abnormal people in our country, but there are a lot of ill-mannered boors. If you are an atheist and at the same time have not achieved the love of the broad masses in life (or, best of all, have not really achieved anything at all) - most likely you are mentally healthy.
Unlike Russian politicians. No, they did not achieve popular love. They are probably abnormal by another criterion. “The patient’s constancy of personality is impaired. Today he is one, tomorrow he is different. Now he says one thing, but in an hour he will say the completely opposite,” explains Sandomirsky.
And psychiatrist Zurab Kikelidze once spoke best about abnormality. One of the journalists asked him if there were schizophrenics among the psychiatrists. “But of course! - the doctor answered. “If we were normal, would we really be able to figure out what mental disorders are?”
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It is possible to live with mentally ill people in a family.
It will greatly help to improve the emotional climate in a family where mentally ill people live by defining clear rules of behavior. Even if there are few of them, it needs to include all aspects of living together that cause problems, such as prohibiting smoking in bed, the need to put clothes away in the closet, and washing dishes after eating.
The main thing is that everything is stated clearly and understandably, possibly in writing. All points of the rules are previously discussed with the patient. This will help him remember and internalize things that are obvious to others.
Strive to make compromise decisions.
Undoubtedly, it is worth avoiding the patient’s communication with people who irritate him, but sooner or later you have to turn to a mentally ill person with criticism or demands. In such a situation, negative feelings need to be expressed clearly, clearly defining the reason for the criticism. You need to openly and honestly explain how your loved ones feel about this, and how this behavior can be changed in the future.
Let's understand the clichés
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By the way, most of us do not know how to determine whether a person is mentally healthy or a psychopath. Do you know why? Because in the movies they blatantly lie to us. Well, it's not that feature film makers are vile deceivers. Their task is simply to show a psycho character in a bright, emotional and interesting way. To get the viewer hooked. But in reality, everything is not quite like that.
Firstly, in the movies, a psycho is a person who is too emotional, quick-tempered, he reacts inadequately to events and people around him, his emotions change sharply and unconsciously.
In reality, a psychopath may not show himself outwardly, and you can cooperate with him without suspecting anything. This person most likely has calm facial expressions, he is friendly and balanced, and if he shows emotions, it is rare and very restrained.
So don't think that a psychopath necessarily looks like a psychopath. Not at all necessary!
Possible signs of mental illness
In what cases is it still worth consulting a specialist?
Each of us is familiar with the state of anxiety, each of us has experienced difficulty sleeping, each of us has experienced periods of depressed mood.
Many are familiar with such phenomena as childhood fears; many were “attached” to some obsessive melody, which for some time it was impossible to get rid of. All of the above conditions occur both normally and in pathology. However, normally they appear sporadically, not for long and, in general, do not interfere with life. If the condition has been prolonged (the formal criterion is a period of more than 2 weeks), if it has begun to impair performance or simply interferes with leading a normal lifestyle, it is better to consult a doctor so as not to miss the onset of a possibly severe disease: it does not necessarily begin with severe mental disorders. Most people, for example, think that schizophrenia is necessarily a severe psychosis.
In fact, almost always schizophrenia (even its most severe forms) begins gradually, with subtle changes in mood, character, and interests. Thus, a previously lively, sociable and affectionate teenager becomes withdrawn, alienated and hostile towards his family. Or a young man who was previously mainly interested in football begins to spend almost days reading books, thinking about the essence of the universe. Or the girl begins to be upset about her appearance, claiming that she is too fat or that she has ugly legs. Such disorders can last for several months or even several years, and only then a more severe condition develops.
Of course, any of the changes described do not necessarily indicate schizophrenia or any mental illness at all. Everyone's character changes during adolescence, and this causes well-known difficulties for parents. Almost all teenagers are upset about their appearance, and many begin to have “philosophical” questions.
In the vast majority of cases, all these changes have nothing to do with schizophrenia. But it happens that they do. It is useful to remember that this may be the case. If the phenomena of “adolescence” are very pronounced, if they create much more difficulties than in other families, it makes sense to consult a psychiatrist. And this is absolutely necessary if the matter is not limited to character changes, but they are joined by other, more distinct painful phenomena, for example, depression or obsessions.
Not all conditions for which it would be reasonable to seek help in a timely manner are listed here. These are just guidelines that can help you suspect something is wrong and make the right decision.
What to do if everything coincides
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The main sign of a real psychopath is that he is almost completely emotionally disconnected, it is almost impossible to offend, touch, or delight him.
On the one hand, he is a calm, stress-resistant, pleasant, balanced person. On the other hand, he is a cold-blooded and impenetrable person, to whom feelings, moral and ethical standards, repentance and conscience are alien. This is why there is such a high percentage of psychopaths among criminals.
Of course, if a couple of points coincide with you, do not rush to accuse an innocent person of anything of mental illness. And don’t throw around such words - this is not a joke. But if the suspicions are serious, and all the points coincide, it would be useful for this person to be examined by a specialist.
If the patient behaves aggressively
Symptoms of schizophrenia include hallucinations and delusional ideas, the content of which often makes those suffering from this disease aggressive towards the world around them.
How to deal with a schizophrenic if he is excited, irritated and negative? You need to act in a certain way:
- make sure that the medication regimen is not violated, and if the patient refuses to take them, mix the drug into food or drink;
- If possible, try to completely avoid communication, not to participate in dialogue - often this is enough for the angry patient to calm down over time;
- do not raise your voice, talk calmly, measuredly, this will help relax a mentally ill person, while a response cry will only aggravate his attack;
- try not to look him in the eyes, this may be regarded by the patient as aggression;
- remove all dangerous objects (piercing and cutting objects, suitable for hitting, etc.) away, do this as discreetly as possible so as not to provoke another quarrel;
- remove people who contribute to irritation and outbursts of negativity in a mentally ill person.
If the situation is out of your control and the scale of the attack scares you, seek medical help immediately. Always remember that a person suffering from mental pathology poses a real danger both to loved ones and to himself.
Dissocial disorder
In common parlance, such people are called sociopaths. They do not take anyone or anything into account, live as they want, try to achieve the fulfillment of their desires, no matter what the cost... They are distinguished by antisocial behavior, which usually begins to manifest itself in childhood.
They can provoke fights, run away from home, steal, and commit acts of violence. They, as a rule, do not experience any warm human feelings or sympathy for those around them, and communicate with them through manipulation. They often take the criminal path.
