Psychologist tells: How to deal with laziness and apathy

Before you try to fight laziness, read a folk tale and answer your question - do you personally have this kind of laziness?

Once upon a time, there lived a lazy man in a village. He did nothing but lie under the tree. The villagers were tired of fighting him and his laziness and decided to drown him. They put him on a cart and took him to the river. And the lady is coming towards you. She felt sorry for the lazy man, what a human being. He may be lazy, such a vice, but he shouldn’t kill for it. The lady orders:

- Let the lazy guy go, I have a useless barn, let him live there. I always have bread left from the table. He will be fed, he will live. Even with laziness.

The villagers were glad and gladly agreed to let the lazy man go. But the lazy man himself suddenly says to the lady:

“Will you bring me bread to the barn?” I don’t like to walk myself, I’m too lazy.

- Yes, the servants will bring it.

- Will they put it in my mouth? Because I don’t like to move my hand myself. I'm lazy.

- Yes, I will say, the servants will put bread in their mouths.

- Will the servants chew and swallow it for me? Or will I have to chew it myself? I'm too lazy to do this too.

“For mercy, lazy fellow, how can the servants be able to chew, much less swallow, bread for you?” This is impossible!

- Oh, they won’t, then?! Well then, good people, take me to drown. Otherwise you’ll have to chew her bread and swallow it yourself. I don't want to, I'm lazy.

If you feel that THIS is not exactly your case, then keep two pieces of news. The first is good: you do not suffer from laziness that cannot be overcome, you just do not have the desire to do what you need to do. The second is not bad, but difficult: until you find why this happened, you will not be able to overcome this pseudo-laziness by any means.

Where does laziness and apathy come from?

Laziness is a beacon that indicates that something has gone wrong. For example, we do not understand what is actually happening inside us, why it is important to do something.

Perhaps initially we do something because it is simply necessary. But this is not our natural desire. Then an internal conflict occurs and part of us says: “I didn’t make such a decision, I don’t want to do it and I won’t.” We begin to strike against social conditions and against the goals set by someone. We become a person who is lazy, who does nothing, and who doesn’t care about the result.

Procrastination is often associated with laziness. When a person does not know what he is doing, just not to do business. But in reality, the reason we put off tasks for a long time may be because we don't know how to do them correctly or why we should do it. And now the level of motivation is very low.

Laziness can also be a defense mechanism of the psyche when a person does not realize that he does not want to do something. May say: “I’m just lazy. I don’t want to do this.” This position, by the way, removes responsibility. It turns out that he has such a character trait, nothing can be done with it. So everything is attributed to external circumstances. If we regard laziness as a character trait, then this is a hopeless situation.

Because it cannot be influenced.

If laziness often arises and becomes a symptom, this indicates that we are out of touch with ourselves, with the inner self. The negative impact of laziness is that we can punish ourselves for “doing nothing.” People around you can do this too. We cannot complete the task on time and efficiently. The point is that we do not generate ideas to improve reality.

How to effectively fight laziness? Basic recommendations and methods

Are there any among us who are not lazy? It seems to me that anyone, even the most motivated person, can be lazy when they just want to lie on the couch and do nothing.

Laziness is, in fact, a constant companion in our lives. It prevents us from growing in our careers, fulfilling household responsibilities and achieving success. However, even such a widespread problem for all of humanity can be effectively combated. Modern psychologists have not only studied the causes of various types of laziness, but also identified effective and practice-tested ways to counteract this scourge.

Laziness in our life

All people are familiar with laziness. This is a state of unwillingness to perform any specific task or a desire for complete inaction. For example, I am often too lazy to do cleaning or other household chores, check my children’s homework, take care of myself, and work. Manifestations of laziness are very diverse, and this indicates that the phenomenon has many causes and varieties. That is why it is so difficult to fight her.

Why are we lazy?

Depletion of energy reserves

There are many reasons for laziness. This may be a state of fatigue, physical fatigue, the influence of prolonged overstrain of the mind or body. For example, responsible young mothers with small children perform such a wide and varied range of responsibilities that this invariably leads them to a state of loss of strength and depletion of internal mental reserves. They are accompanied by a constant feeling of fatigue.

Lack of organization

A person cannot force himself to complete a task that seems too difficult to him. As a result, it is delayed and may not be completed for a very long time. For example, an ongoing renovation or general cleaning. The imagination “inflates” the task to incredible volumes; cleaning is not done only because the woman is embarrassed by its volume and is worried that she will not find the time and energy to do everything perfectly.

Lack of motivation

Motivation is associated with a conscious goal. In order to do something with pleasure, a person needs to feel and understand the need for it for himself, and also clearly define his goals. For example, a woman is told that it is good for her to go to bed and get up early, play sports, move a lot and walk, and follow a diet. But, since she does not have the feeling that this is really necessary, even formally agreeing with such calls, she will not change her habits.

Fears

Even if the choice of business corresponds to interests, a person wants to carry out his plans sincerely, laziness may arise. A common cause of laziness is the fear of failure: a person simply does not believe in his own abilities and does not hope for success in a business that he really likes. He thinks he is doomed to fail. Or, on the contrary, he is subconsciously afraid of success: what if it comes, and the person is not ready to reconsider his inner view of himself in order to recognize his own success and increase self-esteem.

Ways to combat laziness suitable for women

Women's and men's options for combating laziness are different. “Force” and strong-willed methods are most suitable for the strong half of humanity. They are better off forcing themselves to do something. This strengthens the male spirit. On the contrary, violence against oneself harms a woman’s nature. If ladies hit the walls with their heads, rigidly striving for achievements, they lose their femininity. The weaker sex is better suited to the ability to consciously manage their desires and state, getting rid of the desire to be inactive only when truly necessary. In the case when laziness plays into their hands, they need to allow themselves this state and use it creatively. I recently heard a good recommendation on how to deal with laziness - you need to love her and go to visit her, but do this no more than once a month, or even better, once every six months. You need to completely surrender to her for an hour or two, and then she herself will let you go for a while.

How to train yourself to wake up early

Women need to avoid harsh methods of self-discipline. Set an alarm and force yourself to do it every day. The opposite of this, the “soft” method involves the use of the forces of nature, or, in other words, suitable biorhythms. This is especially true for young mothers on maternity leave, because they have a special schedule, with constant sleep breaks at night. Therefore, it is better for women to listen to themselves, go to bed and get up at the most comfortable time, choosing the appropriate mode for themselves. Then you can be more active, feel energetic and full of energy.

Cleaning without laziness

The most common reason for laziness when cleaning is the fear that there will be some overly long and voluminous task ahead. In this case, it will be more effective to divide a large task into parts. For example, read useful literature and after an hour wipe the dust in the room. Put down lunch and wash the floor. As a result, overwork, loss of strength and accompanying irritation will not occur, and you will receive a perfectly tidy apartment. If the mother’s child is already big enough, he can join in the cleaning, at least imitating help. This will teach him from childhood to order and cleanliness.

• We recommend reading the article - How to get rid of laziness - quickly and forever. Top tips

Why laziness cannot be overcome forever

Laziness is a natural phenomenon. It is genetically embedded in us to protect the body from excessive stress. It should signal a person about the need to moderate his ardor and rest, if the work is not too important or harms the body, to save vital resources. Therefore, it will not be possible to eradicate it forever. It is best to approach the problem selectively and consciously, get rid of bouts of laziness if necessary, every time it bothers you. Practice getting rid of laziness, try different methods, find what suits you best. Gradually you will learn to deal with it effectively and forget about this problem. How do you fight laziness?

Kaizen method to combat laziness

The fight against laziness in Japan. The Japanese Kaizen method is based on the one-minute principle. Its meaning is that we need to do something for a minute every day. At the same time. The Japanese believe that one minute is not long and laziness will not interfere. For example, you can work out your abs, read a book, or jump rope. If you take small steps every day, you can achieve big results.

Of course, the technique may not be suitable for some. It is important to understand that the method was invented in Japan. What suits the Japanese may not suit Europeans. The level of self-realization, relationships between elders, and hierarchy have been formed among the Japanese for centuries. Europeans have different methods. The success of kaizen is due to the culture of the country itself. The method is based on the fact that you need to do more and more actively, more, faster.

It is impossible to instill in a person something that is not close to him. You cannot motivate only by external factors: if you do this, you will receive a carrot or a bonus. It is important to separate internal and external in any method. Based only on external factors, a person stops hearing himself and stops wanting.

Take action to overcome inertia.

1. Tell yourself that you can do something. At one moment you can be passive and frozen, and the next minute you can dive into active changes. If the past is holding you back from new actions, it's time to deal with it. Don't bury your fears - work with them. You can always reinvent yourself.

2. Get started. Many people act by inertia, and your first action will be the impulse that will launch a new life and lead you to your goal.

3. Organize your time

Planning is very important - it helps you not to lose your motivation from the very first steps. If you have many tasks, you are torn between them, do not have time to do anything and blame yourself, and guilt destroys motivation

In addition, you can set a time even for rest. If you are just sitting on the couch with a book, decide for yourself when you will get up and go for a walk with the dog, how much time it will take to do laundry or watch TV. Set time intervals help you feel better about your day and not get stuck in one activity.

4. Cheer yourself up

You are your own only coach, so it is important not only to motivate, but also to praise yourself. “I deserve a break, I am striving for my goal, I have achieved something” - all this can be said out loud or silently

You can even reward yourself for small achievements. Simple rewards are an extended break, watching your favorite movie, or your favorite candy.

You will be pleased to know that when you complete your task, you will receive a small reward.

How laziness occurs

To quickly get rid of laziness, you need to understand exactly what caused it. There are quite a lot of mechanisms for its occurrence. But they boil down to the fact that our subconscious seeks to isolate us from any activity that causes discomfort or seems forced and not desirable. By getting to the bottom of the root cause and eliminating it, it will be much easier to get rid of laziness.

So, most often the following reasons make us lazy:

1. Fear of failure
   . Lack of confidence in one's own strengths, competence and sufficient preparedness to carry out a certain job is the most common reason.
2. Fatigue
   . It can be both physical and emotional. A person can burn out more from stress than from challenging work. The best way to get rid of fatigue is to get a good night's sleep. It is advisable to learn the simplest meditation techniques and techniques that allow you to conserve vital energy.
3. Depression
   . This condition leads to a complete lack of motivation. Often the cause-and-effect relationship is blurred. Depression leads to laziness, and lack of success and breakthroughs in life only makes depression worse. The best way to deal with this condition is to carefully analyze your own goals and the emotional obstacles that prevent you from achieving them. By identifying the cause of depression and eliminating it, you can get rid of laziness without much effort.
4. Weak willpower
   . Willpower refers to a person’s ability to do what is needed instead of what one wants. A great way to overcome your own weakness and complete difficult work is to start with simple tasks and gradually move on to complex ones.
5. Hope for a miracle
   . People tend to hope for “maybe”. You can often hear the statement that this feature was brought up in our country by folk tales. But people all over the world face similar motivational problems. And in order to get rid of laziness caused by relying on a miracle, you need to understand that all important events are the result of our actions, and not inaction.
6. Adrenaline addiction
   . Most former students have the experience of writing complex term papers overnight. Urgent work, panic and an adrenaline surge force a person to work with increased productivity. Many people retain their tendency to work in this mode even at 25 and even at 35 years old. But stress is not the best help. It degrades your health and the quality of your work. It’s better to spend one and a half to two times more time, but do everything efficiently, without causing harm to your own nervous system along the way.
7. Lack of motivation
   . If a person does not have a clear understanding of what he will get by completing a certain task, it is perceived as useless work. The optimal solution to such a problem is to search for motivation (it is necessary to analyze what benefits the result will bring).

What not to do when you don't feel like getting to work

1. There is no need to explain to yourself that you will definitely get to work tomorrow

Yes, you can spend long weeks on this. Constantly telling yourself that tomorrow will be the day when you will be ready to work is not a good solution. You know that such days happen quite rarely.

2. Don’t kid yourself that laziness is so hard to overcome that nothing will work out.

Most often, after the first step and a couple of minutes of work, you will know that you may be able to work. Laziness is only in your head, there is no superhuman strength that prevents you from acting. And if it's just a thought, then why don't you conquer it?