All fears come from childhood - so said the famous psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud. And he was completely right. How to overcome the fear of fighting? This question is very important for a large number of people. Often such fears arise in early childhood, when a fight occurs over some toy and the child does not emerge victorious. It becomes painful and offensive. And if parents are still punished for bad behavior, then the child remembers this situation for a long time, which provoked a feeling of fear of a fight. Not every person can overcome the horror of pain. Often people are afraid not even of their own pain, but of causing pain to another person.
The presence of fear also lies in the instinct of self-preservation. Nature has endowed us with this feeling for a reason. What could happen if people did not have a sense of fear? Humanity simply did not survive.
A person who is not used to solving problems with his fists often experiences fear not only of a fight, but even of the sight of people fighting.
Sometimes even the fair sex has to get into a fight, so everyone needs to be able to defend themselves.
Girls are often afraid to resist for fear of ruining their appearance or being injured. The limiting factor is the feeling of pain, because not everyone has a high level of “pain threshold”. But we should not forget that we live in a rather cruel world, so sometimes you need to be able to stand up for your life.
People may have different fears that need to be overcome, such as fear of heights or depth, fear of insects, fear of confined spaces, and many others. But life consists of different situations and sometimes you have to get into a fight not of your own free will. Sometimes circumstances force us to stand up for a woman, a child, our family and our own lives. It is for this occasion that it is worth learning to overcome the fear of a fight.
How to get rid of the fear of fighting?
Initially, you should try to avoid a fight, without thinking that someone might consider you a coward. You should find the right words to reassure your potential rival, because your health, and especially your life, is the most important thing, and the opinion of others is a secondary issue. There are situations when you are forced to come into conflict with fists. Don't let yourself be humiliated. In this case, you can use the following tips.
First, try to figure out what exactly you are afraid of. Are you worried about a black eye, a broken jaw or a knocked out tooth? Or maybe you just don’t want to solve the issue with your fists on principle? A psychologist will help you understand all situations. It helps to identify the true cause of the phobia.
To eliminate general anxiety, you can practice meditation. Many psychologists recommend this method to get rid of depression, fears and stress. A one-time meditation can already change the situation for the better and help overcome the fear of fighting, and regular practice can completely eliminate this syndrome.
Thanks to meditation, samurai had no fear of battle at all and were invincible.
Another effective method is relaxation. It completely brings the body into a relaxed state, which helps get rid of mental stress.
You should try to wean yourself from the habit of doing a detailed analysis of the situation, especially before a fight. Just act and do not succumb to provocations until the feeling of fear takes over you with full force. You can’t get hung up on your thoughts and give in to panic. Pay attention to how wrestlers and boxers behave before a combat match. With their behavior they try to provoke aggression in their opponent. And this is not without reason - they follow the recommendations of their psychologists. You need to learn to transform your fear into anger, this will help you cope with your opponent.
You can sign up for personal growth training to improve your self-esteem. After all, very often underestimating one’s capabilities leads to conflict situations. People around you try to humiliate you and sometimes even challenge you to fight.
A good way to get rid of the fear of fighting is self-defense courses. Especially if your fear lies in your inability to fight. Sports such as karate, boxing, wrestling, judo will help you stop being afraid of hitting a person and engage in a duel with him. Systematic training will develop the endurance, strength and courage that are necessary to defend your interests. Also, playing sports will help you cope with your emotions. Thanks to this, the fear of fighting will disappear.
When a person is confident in himself and is not afraid to fight, his opponent feels it. You need to show your enemy that you are not afraid to look him straight in the face and do not look away to the side.
The very first time
Some intelligent guys and girls who have never participated in street fights are afraid of a fight, because they don’t know how it all happens. How to hit and defend correctly? Who should attack first? How does a person feel when he hits his opponent?
If the main cause of fear is the unknown, then psychologists advise turning on the imagination. First, look through books on self-defense and find out the location of the pain points. Of course, textbooks won’t tell you how not to miss and simply hit vulnerable areas. But at least a beginner will know where to aim. Then replay the upcoming fight in your head. With dialogues, attacking and repelling enemy attacks. A person must imagine how he will act. Put your hand forward or tilt your body to the side. He will cover his face with his palm or crouch down so that the opponent loses his balance, and then push the attacker and knock him to the ground.
When a fighter has a rough plan of action, fighting fear is much easier. In emergency situations, when there is no time for reflection and imagination, you need to turn fear into interest. Who said fighting isn't fun? Perhaps a person was born for street fighting, he just doesn’t know, because he’s never tried it.
Of course, if the enemy has melee weapons or there are too many opponents, then the best way out is to run. But one bully can be dealt with. And turn a fight into a fun activity that helps you let off steam and get rid of the effects of stress. Perhaps the opponent, who five minutes ago promised to bury his opponent in the asphalt, after a little sparring will become a best friend or at least a good acquaintance with whom you can have a glass of beer after a busy day at work. After all, in some fights the main thing is not victory, but participation.
How can you resolve a conflict without fighting?
In order to resolve the situation without fights, you need to:
- Look your opponent in the eyes without showing any aggression. By looking away, you will be unable to control the situation.
- Do not support the angry communication style of an emotional person. You can't feed his anger.
- Communicate in a confident and calm tone.
We come to the conclusion that to overcome the fear of a fight, you need to consult a psychologist, practice meditation and relaxation, attend auto-training classes, increase your self-esteem and play sports that teach self-defense.
You should try to mentally say the words “I’m not afraid” more often, then, following the above advice, you will stop feeling afraid of a fight and will be able to stand up for yourself and your loved ones.
Punishment for misconduct
In kindergarten and school, children regularly get into fights over toys, sweets, problems with classmates and other little things. They are not afraid to use physical force. Fear develops in a child who is constantly punished for wrongdoing. A logical chain is built in the subconscious: if you hit someone, you get hit with a belt or left without dinner. The fear of punishment continues into adulthood. When a man or woman is faced with a choice to fight or run away, in 99 cases they prefer the second option. After all, she can be punished for bad behavior.
It is difficult to fight the subconscious, because the complexes laid down in childhood only become stronger over the years. Psychologists advise starting with the realization that an adult can act as he wants. And no one has the right to criticize his choice. After a fight in a gateway or bar, a strict father with a leather belt or an evil mother promising to tear off your ears will not appear on the doorstep.
Of course, there are criminal penalties for fighting. Fine, suspended sentence or real prison sentence. But the initiator is responsible for damage and injury. If a person had to fight to avoid being robbed or killed, then the criminal will end up in the dock. And the second participant will act as the victim.
It is easy to prove the initiator's guilt. In big cities there are many cameras that record what is happening. Video materials are essential evidence. In addition, you can always find witnesses to a fight and avoid criminal liability.
It's all in the head
Look at some categories of people and animals. Why is it that in nature the most fierce rival is a mother whose children have been wronged? Just try to touch a wolf cub or a tiger cub, the wolf or tigress will tear you to shreds. Even the mother of a simple sparrow will try to peck out your eye if you touch her child. It’s the same with humans. Try to offend a child, and the woman will become fierce and furious, although in life she is a sweet and calm person. This is maternal instinct. She has an attitude in her head - to protect the child at all costs. Therefore, in order to cope with fears of a fight, you need to give yourself the right psychological attitude.
The book of one scientist who writes about self-hypnosis talks about one interesting experiment. In a regular martial arts gym, average fighters trained. The district champion was supposed to come visit them, but they didn’t even know him. The coach decided to conduct an experiment. He told one of his fighters that now an upstart, an ignoramus, a braggart is coming, who thinks that he can defeat you in sparring. That is, he got it into his fighter’s head that he could defeat the “newbie” without much effort. The coach told the champion that the person he would now fight with was a very talented, promising guy. That is, he put doubt in the head of the district champion. This psychological attitude allowed the young fighter to fight without fear. But the champion, on the contrary, found it psychologically difficult, and he lost. When the winning fighter was told who he had defeated, he was shocked and admitted that if he had known who he was fighting, he would not have been able to win.
Therefore, if you can set yourself up correctly before a fight, this is almost half of the successful outcome of the case. Don't be afraid of the person standing in front of you, he is the same as you.
14 ways to get rid of fear and anxiety
Bullets and shrapnel
As an inheritance from the soldiers of the First World War, the soldiers of the Red Army received a sign not to shoot the cartridge from the first issued clip, but to keep it as an amulet. The finest hour of this bullet came upon returning home, where it was supposed to be shot. This military superstition was mentioned by the Soviet historian Lev Pushkarev, whose friend kept a debut clip of rifle cartridges with him throughout the war.
Another superstition associated with ammunition is the tradition of making amulets from bullets or shrapnel that once wounded a military man. According to the recollections of both WWII front-line soldiers and veterans of modern conflicts, this tradition was associated with the belief that the owners of such “trophies” were protected from injury and death, because “the only bullet that was cast for me is already with me.” The fighters made holes in them and wore them on a string around their necks.
Shaving
Soldiers considered shaving before battle to be a bad omen. The most strictly adhered to this rule were Soviet pilots, who during the Great Patriotic War preferred to get rid of stubble in the evening, on the eve of combat missions. This superstition became even more firmly entrenched in the minds of pilots after an incident that occurred during the liberation of Poland, when two soldiers from the 1st squadron of the 141st Guards Assault Regiment, not expecting, due to bad weather, that an order would be received to take off, got rid of vegetation on the face. But suddenly improved weather conditions allowed the command to begin a battle, from which the planes of all pilots returned to the airfield, except those who violated the unwritten rule.
Soldiers during the Afghan campaign adhered to the ban on shaving before battle. Gennady Udovichenko, who at that time held the position of deputy commander of a special forces company, explained this habit from a security point of view in his memoirs. As it turned out, due to the peculiarities of their physiology, dushmans have a very developed sense of smell, and in conditions of low air humidity, aromas spread over long distances. Having shaved and applied cream, soap or cologne to their skin, the fighters became easy prey for opponents who could smell the scent of hygiene products from afar.
Clean linen
Another superstition relates to clean underwear, and in different historical eras, soldiers held opposing opinions regarding whether or not they should wear them immediately before battle.
In the imperial army, it was considered the norm to change into fresh underwear before battle, since in those days religious consciousness prevailed over secular consciousness. Assuming that each battle could be the last, the soldiers seemed to be preparing in advance for a meeting with the Lord, before whom it was a terrible sin to appear before him in dirty clothes.
Less devout doctors and orderlies encouraged soldiers to wear clean underwear to reduce the likelihood of blood poisoning when injured.
However, in the Soviet military environment, an antipodean superstition has become established, according to which it is impossible to change underwear immediately before a battle. Thus, they consciously refused the role of a potential victim, discarding the idea in what form they should appear before the Almighty.
Photo
Psychology professor Konstantin Platonov, in his research work “Psychology of Religion,” noted that tank crews and pilots avoided meeting photographers before combat missions. This sign has its roots in the history associated with the name of the hero-pilot of the First World War, Pyotr Nesterov, who did not return from the flight after an ill-fated photo shoot.
In view of this, military personnel preferred to pose in front of camera lenses only after a successfully completed operation.
New form
The military personnel paid great attention to the “happy” uniform, which allowed them to return unharmed from the battle. This clothing immediately became a kind of amulet for the soldier, which he tried to put on every time he was facing a mortal battle with the enemy.
Hero of the Baltic Fleet Ivan Lukyanov noticed that the tunics in which soldiers went to the front carried memories of peaceful life, and it was in them that the mothers and wives of the men sewed protective icons and crosses.
Hero of the Soviet Union, pilot Nikolai Pribylov, at any time of the year, flew in winter overalls that brought him luck, and his colleague and holder of a similar high rank, Nikolai Purgin, made all his 232 military missions in the same thoroughly worn uniform.
If the command expressed dissatisfaction with the appearance of the fighters, they either put an old tunic under a new shirt, or before the start of the operation they secretly changed into a well-worn uniform, which had saved them in battle more than once.
