Use this method if all other methods have failed.
Controlled crying is the most effective method for developing sleep habits in infants over 6 months of age.
Prepare yourself.
This is a very intensive technique and requires a lot of dedication and perseverance, but it has proven to be successful in getting babies to sleep through the night. If your baby is still feeding at night, it is best to use the key night method to make sure he is not crying from hunger.
Start using the controlled crying method on the evening of the first day.
The same procedure should be followed no matter how many times the child wakes up during the night.
- Day 1:
- Set a bedtime and stick to it. Plan at least an hour for bathing, feeding and evening exercise.
- Wait at least 5-10 minutes before returning and calming him down. Consolative measures should also be kept to a minimum. You can pet him, softly whisper “shhh,” but resist the urge to pick him up. After 2 minutes, leave the room again, even if the baby continues to cry.
- After the first half hour of crying, the time between returns should be increased to 15-20 minutes.
- Continue to approach him every 15-20 minutes until the baby falls asleep. Consolation should still be minimal and last no more than 2 minutes. It is not recommended to take your baby out of the crib.
- If your child wakes during the night, continue with the same plan, gradually increasing the interval between returns to 20 minutes.
Put your baby in his crib before he gets too sleepy. Kiss him and leave the room.
- When napping, it's important to pick up where you left off the night before.
Wait at least 20 minutes before approaching your child and remain present for no more than two minutes while offering minimal reassurance.
The most common problem that parents of children under three years of age may encounter is that their children are awake at night. That is, a healthy infant does not sleep well at night, often wakes up - what to do about this, because he plays for a while while he is awake and only then falls asleep... This mode causes a lot of inconvenience to parents. What to do? Why is this happening? “Popular about health” will answer these questions.
Why does my baby sleep so poorly at night?
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It’s one thing when something bothers the baby, for example, a runny nose, teething, or fever. But it’s completely different when the baby is absolutely healthy, but at the same time his night sleep is intermittent. Why is this happening? Let's look at several reasons.
1. The main reason for being awake at night, when the baby is healthy and cheerful, is too much daytime sleep. After sleeping during the day, he is full of energy, he wakes up and starts playing.
2. Light source. Many parents use night lights, but they sometimes cause children to wake up at night. The baby's brain perceives the light source as a signal that it is time to wake up. Not only a night light can interfere with sleep, for example, indicators on household appliances, light on the phone screen, street lamps.
3. The child is put to bed too late. Many people are mistaken when they think that if they put the baby to bed later and let him get thoroughly tired, then he will sleep soundly at night. It's not like that with children. Going to bed late contributes to overstimulation. In this state, the baby, of course, will fall asleep when he gets tired, but after a while he will wake up, and not in the best mood.
4. The baby does not know how to fall asleep on its own. This skill is very important, because when a baby gets used to being rocked or latched to the chest before going to bed, then when he wakes up, he needs the same ritual. He simply will not be able to fall asleep on his own.
5. There is no clear daily routine. If parents do not make efforts to organize a clear routine, circadian rhythms become confused. The baby constantly lacks sleep, is overexcited, and his body gives the wrong commands to get up. As a result, the child will completely lose his routine.
6. Active games in the evening. This problem occurs in children older than one year. Parents entertain their children in every possible way, play outdoor games with them, laugh, which leads to overexcitation. Despite the fatigue, sometimes the baby looks quite cheerful. This is because the hormone cortisol is produced. It helps cope with fatigue by activating the nerve centers of the brain, but then it keeps the baby from falling asleep. The same effect is achieved after watching cartoons for a long time.
Other reasons for waking at night
There are other factors that influence children's sleep and its quality. For example, an infant sometimes has difficulty sleeping at night due to weather conditions. Wind has a negative effect on the nervous system. Many parents notice this.
Older children wake up due to natural needs:
1. They are hot. 2. It's cold. 3. I'm thirsty. 4. Teeth are being cut, gums hurt. 5. The nose can't breathe.
What to do, how to improve night sleep for an infant
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An infant should be taught to go to bed at the same time. Mothers should not allow the baby to sleep during the day longer than he needs, otherwise problems will arise at night. It is necessary to focus on the norm of sleep duration by age.
In the evening, it is advisable to play quiet games, read fairy tales, and look at pictures. If we are talking about infants, then it is important to avoid receiving guests in the evening. New faces, voices, movement in the house - all this will negatively affect the child’s emotional background.
Be sure to follow the tradition - before going to bed, always bathe your baby in warm water, give him milk, talk to him tenderly or sing a song. All this has a calming effect on the nervous system and sets you up for a sound, restful sleep.
Eliminate light sources. The windows must have thick curtains to block the penetration of light from car headlights and street lamps. It's good if the room is quiet. True, in the summer, when the windows are open, noise from the street can bother you. There is hardly anything that can be done about this - dogs barking, teenagers talking, the sounds of passing cars - all this creates interference for a restful sleep.
Make sure your baby is comfortable. You need to clean your nose in the evening so that accumulated crusts do not interfere with breathing freely. Humidify the air in the room, ventilate the house. It is important that the bedroom is not hot. Keep a bottle of water nearby in case your baby gets thirsty. If she's nearby, you won't have to get up and go to the kitchen. Otherwise, the awakened baby may have time to play out.
Teach your baby to fall asleep on his own, then he will not call you if he wakes up at night, he will not need your presence, but will fall asleep on his own. Strictly follow the daily routine, according to your age, and never deviate from it. If all else fails, consult a neurologist. Perhaps the child needs the help of a doctor.
If your baby wakes up frequently at night but is otherwise healthy, the parents are probably doing something wrong. It is worth reconsidering the daily routine, bedtime, and the conditions in which the baby is. In most cases, after correcting the daily routine, the problem is solved.
A baby’s restless sleep not only physically and emotionally exhausts parents, but also causes considerable concern for the child’s health. Many mothers go to the doctor with complaints that the baby is tossing and turning in his crib and often waking up. However, such phenomena are typical for most infants and rarely signal the presence of pathologies.
The sleep of an infant is significantly different from the sleep of an adult. The baby's body needs a lot of time to regulate circadian rhythms. Continuous sleep is usually achieved only by one and a half to two years of age. The total amount of time a newborn baby spends sleeping is evenly distributed throughout the circadian cycle. Thus, the baby can sleep up to 20 hours a day, waking up every 60-180 minutes.
It happens that during the first six months of life the baby sleeps well, but subsequently parents begin to notice that their child shudders in his sleep, cries, moves around the crib with his eyes closed and often wakes up. As a rule, such phenomena are associated with the activity of the nervous system of a growing baby, which, during sleep, begins to actively analyze the new experience gained by the child during the previous day. If, after a restless night's sleep, the baby continues to remain alert and does not show signs of illness, then he has enough rest and parents should not worry about the baby's well-being.
A child's total sleep time can be divided into 3 main phases:
- Falling asleep stage.
At this stage, the child may be capricious or watch his mother, periodically closing his eyelids. Some children who are in a borderline state between sleep and wakefulness begin to roll their eyes (or even move in different directions), which often causes a feeling of severe anxiety in the mother. A small child does not yet have the strength of the eye muscles, so this condition is quite normal for a newborn. However, in cases where eye rolling is accompanied by crying and severe anxiety in the baby, or does not go away after three months of life, you should consult a doctor.
- The phase of superficial (rapid) sleep.
During this phase, the baby’s nervous system and brain structures mature. At this time, the baby experiences irregular breathing and periodic twitching of the eyelids. A child in a dream can smile, shudder, move his eyeballs; at this time it is very easy to wake him up.
- The phase of deep (slow) sleep.
Deep sleep occurs 20-30 minutes after falling asleep. This phase is characterized by measured breathing, immobility of the eyeballs and muscle relaxation. During this period, it is quite difficult to wake up the child, so the mother can calmly transfer him to the crib. The duration of deep sleep is no more than an hour, after which the baby’s sleep again becomes superficial.
In infants, the average duration of each phase is about half an hour. At the same time, in infants up to six months, shallow sleep predominates, to which about 80% of rest is allocated. By six months, the duration of shallow sleep is reduced to 50%, by the age of three - to 30%, and only by 7-8 years, the duration of this phase begins to correspond to the duration of shallow sleep in an adult and takes up about 20% of the total sleep time.
The most common causes of sleep disturbance in infants include:
- age-related physiological characteristics;
- emotional overload;
- diseases of the gastrointestinal tract;
- neurological pathologies;
- lack of a well-organized sleep schedule.
Most often, sleep disorders occur in overly excitable and emotional children. An excess of received emotions, overwork, and an improperly organized daily routine lead to overstimulation of the nervous system, as a result of which the baby cannot fall asleep for a long time and periodically wakes up at night.
Abdominal pain, teething and clothes that are too tight can also cause your baby to become restless at night. In addition, the quality of children's sleep largely depends on the temperature and humidity in the room. Dry warm air causes the nasal mucosa to dry out, causing the baby to have difficulty breathing during sleep and waking up crying.
If the child’s sleep does not return to normal for a long time, or if you suspect that the baby’s anxiety is caused by emotional or physiological disorders, you should consult a pediatrician and neurologist.
In most cases, the causes of poor sleep in infants can be easily eliminated without the participation of doctors or medications. In order to ensure your baby has a healthy and sound sleep, you can use the following recommendations:
- To prevent your baby from waking up hungry, feed him tightly before putting him to bed. Before feeding, you can go for a walk with your baby: fresh air perfectly stimulates the appetite and makes it easier to fall asleep.
- If your baby has difficulty falling asleep at night due to a long daytime rest, it is necessary to reduce the time he sleeps during the day.
- To help your child relax before going to bed, give him a light tummy massage, moving your hand in a clockwise direction.
- Put your baby down at the first sign of fatigue.
- At night, ensure your child is completely quiet both when falling asleep and while sleeping. During the daytime, teach your baby to fall asleep to soft sounds.
- Do not forget that the child should associate the bed only with sleep. Therefore, you should not feed your baby or play with him in bed.
- A few hours before bedtime, provide your child with as calm an environment as possible.
- If you notice that your child becomes relaxed and sleepy after bathing, use five-minute warm baths in the evening. If your baby, on the contrary, becomes more active and alert after washing, such procedures should be performed only in the morning and afternoon.
- Try not to turn on bright lights at night, even if the child is awake. Install a night light in the room where the baby rests.
- Make sure that the children's room is not too hot or stuffy. The optimal air temperature in the bedroom is 18-20°C. Be sure to ventilate the room in which the baby sleeps and regularly carry out air humidification measures.
- Put your child to bed at the same time every day.
When creating a sleep schedule, parents need to take into account the baby's biological clock. If the sleep and wake routine organized by adults contradicts the natural needs of the child, it will be extremely difficult for him to fall asleep and wake up at the hours allotted by his parents. This not only contributes to lack of sleep, but also has an extremely negative effect on the baby’s immune and nervous systems, which can result in serious disorders that require long-term treatment. Therefore, before determining the bedtime for their baby, mom and dad should observe the child for several days: changes in his behavior will tell parents what time the baby needs to go to bed and get up.
Child's health. Sleep apnea
Sleep disturbances in children are quite common; almost all parents are familiar with this problem. The reasons for this are very different. They can be caused not only by the age characteristics of children, but also by an improperly organized day and night routine. Below you will find out whether the child sleeps poorly, often wakes up, cries, and how to cope with this problem.
Infant sleep duration
The baby's sleep at first depends on how much time has passed since birth. Further, the duration of sleep in newborns varies by month:
- During the first 2 weeks of life, a newborn’s sleep takes almost the whole day (20-22 hours). At this time, he sleeps intermittently, since the baby does not yet understand when day and night begin. During the day, an infant sleeps for 2-3 hours at a time, and a little longer at night. He wakes up periodically to eat. If he does not receive milk every 3-4 hours, he will not have enough strength, so frequent awakenings are the norm.
- Over the next few weeks, the duration of rest slowly decreases to 16-18 hours per day. The baby is accustomed to the environment and can go without feeding for about 6 hours at night. During the day after feeding, he will not immediately fall asleep. Now he will study the world around him, only after that he will get tired.
- Infants' sleep begins to change from month to month from the third month. By the end of this period, it is enough for the baby to get 15-16 total hours of sleep per day.
- Around six months of age, he begins to transition to rest at night, but still needs rest breaks during the day. In total, rest will also take about 15 hours, of which 8-10 are at night, the rest is divided into short naps for the baby during the day, 1-1.5 hours each.
- Over the next 3 months (from 6 to 9), the total rest time is reduced to 12 hours a day. Most of the time the baby rests at night. During the day, rest is required before lunch and in the afternoon for 1-1.5 hours.
- From 9 months to one year, children need 10-11 hours of rest, which includes two short rest breaks during the day. Parents try to establish the baby’s daily routine and not disturb it.
The regimen changes every 2-3 months for up to a year
How to put a baby to sleep
- Teach your child to distinguish between daytime and nighttime sleep. Establish a clear sleep schedule;
- Don't let your baby become overtired, as overtiredness only interferes with sleep. As soon as you see that the baby is tired, rubbing his eyes and yawning, put him to bed!;
- After three months, begin to gradually establish a bedtime routine. You can take a bath, read a story, play a quiet game or sing a lullaby. Use what your baby likes!;
- Follow the sequence of actions of the daily ritual!;
- After 6 months, let your baby fall asleep on his own;
- Wake up your baby in the morning if he sleeps longer than expected. It’s good if you wake up your child at the same time;
- For children after 1.5-2 years, begin the transition from two naps during the day to one nap during the day. However, this transition is difficult, and to make the process easier, alternate days with one and two naps during the day. For one nap, put your baby to bed early in the evening;
- For older kids, you can offer an alternative. But choose the options so that they suit you too. For example, ask your baby if he wants to go to bed now or in 5 minutes. 5 minutes does not play a special role, and at the same time the child is glad that he chose;
- Let your child choose which toy he will sleep with or what pajamas he will wear.
Any mother has the right to choose how and what to feed her baby. Moreover, for some mothers, unfortunately, there is no choice. Breastfeeding for a mother can be both tender moments alone with her baby and tormenting agony.
Many mothers feel uncomfortable with the feeling of complete attachment to home and baby; restrictions in the usual lifestyle and diet, and sometimes the inability to eliminate medications, can become a serious factor when choosing artificial feeding.
This is a choice that every mother has the right to.
But sometimes a nursing mother, whose child is not sleeping well, hears the opinion of friends, pediatricians (which is especially sad), and grandmothers that this is all due to the fact that the baby is breastfed. The words that endless waking up at night are the essence of motherhood, and since I feed myself, even more so, for a long time kept me in the state of an eternally sleepy and tired heroine. Are breastfeeding mothers really doomed to the feat of endless night feedings until weaning? For me, the end came when one night my son woke up 8 times, after which in the morning I no longer remembered how many more times I got up to “feed” him.
In fact, bottle-fed babies often sleep no better or worse than those who are breastfed.
The thing is that the amount or type of food is not always the reason for night (especially frequent) awakenings of a child older than 3-4 months. Yes, breast milk is absorbed faster by the digestive system; Yes, formula-fed babies can sleep for longer periods due to slower absorption of the formula, and, accordingly, a longer period of satiety. However, the main reason for sleepless nights is still the lack of skill in infants (and sometimes early preschool children) to fall asleep independently. So babies look for support and help from their mother (who else?) in the form of the call “feed me”, “hold me in your arms”, “rock me”, “be my pacifier”, etc. And mom happily goes to the rescue, until one day she stops, realizing with horror that all she can think about now is a continuous sleep of 2 (insert your number) hours.
I keep repeating that all children are different, but there are guidelines that will help a mother decide whether her baby’s feeling of hunger is real or whether he still needs her support.
- Newborn babies need to eat every 2-3 hours, regardless of whether it is day or night. During this period, frequent attachments are also important for a young mother, because... her lactation is still in its infancy;
- Babies aged 3-4 months will need about 2-3 feedings (sometimes 4) per 12 hours of sleep at night. Remember, a baby's sleep structure will change around 4 months;
- Babies 5-7 months old need 1-2 feedings per night;
- Closer to a year, at the age of 10-12 months, most children, regardless of the type of feeding, sleep through the night. Don't forget that there are adults who are not able to live 12 hours without going to the kitchen, so be patient if your baby still wakes up to eat once. However, you must be absolutely sure that he knows how to fall asleep on his own and actually eats during such awakenings (swallowing should be clearly audible).
Around one year of age, if you are still nursing, you may want to consider weaning off night feedings.
There are also factors that increase the baby’s need to attach to the mother’s breast, which are important to remember. At the age of 4-5 months, a child already knows a lot: turn his head and follow objects, focus his vision on objects located at different distances, sometimes turn over, distinguish voices and sounds - the world around him becomes more and more interesting for him. This means he can't miss anything, and sometimes even feeding time feels wasted.
The baby is distracted by every little thing during the day, and his mother can hardly “make” him eat. As a result, at night, when this amazing world becomes quiet and dims its colors, the child is forced to compensate for everything that was not eaten during the day. A good solution in this case would be to organize daytime feeding in a quiet, darkened room. Some mothers are helped by babywearing beads, which distract the baby, but do not require him to turn his head, others hide in the pantry while feeding - all methods are good here.
Teething, colds, colic and other ailments will also increase the number of night feedings. When we don’t feel well, we want warmth and care, and mother’s breasts for a child are the embodiment of these concepts. There is nothing left but to alleviate the baby’s suffering, including through frequent attachments. If you are sure that the cause of the problem is colic, try to feed your baby on one breast for as long as possible - this way he will receive nutritious “hind milk” and not overeat “fore milk,” which can also cause bloating. Fortunately, such periods still pass quickly.
Working or studying mothers may not have time to spend enough time with the baby during the day, and he will ask for compensation at night. Therefore, it is very important to give the child maximum warmth and care during those daytime hours when you are nearby. Carry him in your arms, talk to him, touch him. Skin-to-skin contact will give the baby a feeling of security and confidence that mom is nearby, even if sometimes during the day she goes to work. However, such mothers sometimes find night feedings a wonderful time to be alone, because mothers need this time no less.
Stressful situations will also provoke most babies to search for their mother and demand the breast. Relatives coming to visit, parents quarreling, going to a party with a child, moving to their own separate crib or even room, participating in a costume party (have you been looking at the face of a clown or Santa Claus for a long time?) are not such fun events for a fragile psyche, but a mother’s warmth is the best guarantor of safety. Try to avoid such events while the child is very young, and if this is not possible, do not deny the baby additional attachment. Another way to help him feel secure is to offer a cuddle toy. Such a toy should be with the baby during the warmest moments of his life (feeding, fun games with parents) at first, then, having it nearby, it will be easier for him to survive short periods of new situations.
How to teach a child to fall asleep without breastfeeding
If you have eliminated all the reasons described above, and your baby still wakes up more often than necessary for adequate nutrition for his age, what is the reason? Often in such situations, the formed negative association between breasts and sleep is to blame. In other words, the baby simply does not know any other way to relax and fall asleep other than rhythmic sucking on his mother’s chest. But, as I often write in my plans, if he doesn’t know, it doesn’t mean he can’t learn! Who knew falling asleep was a skill that had to be taught? But, think about it, you taught your baby to properly latch onto the chest, roll over, sit, chew, drink from a spoon - why not fall asleep? So, how to put a baby to bed without breastfeeding - survival instructions:
The first step to solving the problem of frequent night awakenings for breastfed children should be the separation of feedings and sleep.
In order to show your baby that there are other ways to relax, it is important to give him these ways to explore and try to find his own. And for this he must stay awake after feeding!
So, if your baby is older than 5 months, feed after bedtime, not before it. Move all feedings out of the sleeping area - ideally into another room, and definitely don't feed while lying on the bed, where you both have a good chance of falling asleep. This is difficult, especially at night, but your persistence will bear fruit in just a few days.
A sleepy and relaxed baby should have the opportunity to try his hand at falling asleep - give him the opportunity to roll in the crib, sing songs, even whine - do not rush to “save” him at the very first second of anxiety. Understand that any change in routine will be met with protest, but if you have a goal, it is worth pursuing. Your tossing around will only confuse the child even more. At the same time, feel free to help him in other ways - rock him a little, sing, hiss or pat him. It is important that gradually, over the course of days (and sometimes weeks), you reduce your “help”, giving him more and more space to fall asleep on his own. Ideally, your help should stop before the child finally falls asleep - he should make this wonderful transition from wakefulness to sleep himself.
Be sure to put your baby to sleep where he will wake up at night. A sudden change of scenery, when he fell asleep on your bed and woke up on the other side of the room in his crib, can frighten and upset children, and you do not need it at all.
Every mother dreams of her baby falling asleep at the same time every evening and sleeping soundly and angelically throughout the night. At the same time, it is ideal to cancel the evening whims, “I want to drink, eat, play” and “read Kolobok to me 105 times.” Our friends from the Eksmo publishing house provided the NNmama.ru portal with an exclusive excerpt from the book “Doctor_annamama, I have a question: #how to care for a child?” , in which Dr. Anna reveals all the secrets of children's sleep.
Other rituals
Little conservatives agree much more easily with parental decisions if they are accompanied by familiar rituals. But evening rituals (bathing, brushing teeth, reading a bedtime story) are not suitable during the day. We need others.
There is no need to change your baby into pajamas. It is a sign of a “serious” night’s sleep. Let him sleep in a diaper or panties with a T-shirt. Do not close the blackout curtains. In complete darkness, the baby’s biorhythms will be disrupted, the body will decide that night has come, and instead of the prescribed 2 hours, the baby will sleep until the evening. Make noise. Not much, of course, but an absolute sound vacuum is also harmful.
Pause is very important!
Meanwhile, the child looked somewhat restless only because of the onset of the REM sleep phase - the baby can turn from side to side, he can laugh, cry, scream, even open his eyes. But he is sleeping! And if you don’t touch the baby, shallow sleep will move into the next phase, deep sleep - breathing will slow down, the baby will calm down, the arms and legs will relax and he will blissfully snore. Watch your child, give him time. How many? Even 15 seconds is enough!
Every second of child anxiety causes a lot of worry for the mother. And this time may seem endless. But it’s worth making an effort on yourself for the benefit of the whole family. At this time, you can slowly count to yourself and gently rock the cradle.
If the baby does not calm down during this period, even in a minute or two, of course, you should look for other reasons - maybe it’s a wet diaper? Or the baby has cold hands and forehead - then you need to cover him with an additional blanket, he will warm up and fall asleep. If the baby is bothered by colic, you can give simethicone preparations in the recommended dosages (with the permission of the pediatrician) and turn him over on his tummy with a warm sheet (for example, pre-warm him with a heating pad).
Analyze, maybe the baby hasn’t eaten enough during the day and that’s why he’s hungry now? It's time to feed him! But leave this option as a last resort, especially if the baby is more than three months old. Pediatricians say: feeding at night, about 11-12 hours, and in the morning, about six, is quite enough for full growth and weight gain, provided that lactation is well-established.
...So he rested during the day! A small child will “sleep” his daily requirement. And, from a health point of view, staying up at night won’t bring him any particular harm. Another question is that dad or both parents will need to get ready for work in the morning; they will not have the opportunity to sleep during the day. They need the night in terms of rest. In this case, it is definitely necessary to reduce the amount of daytime sleep the child takes and significantly increase the child’s physical activity in the morning and afternoon. Before going to bed, you also need to take a good walk and have a good, moderately hearty meal. If the problem cannot be solved with these basic methods, you should contact a pediatrician and, if indicated, a pediatric neurologist.
Sleep is the most important part in the life of a small child. The quality of sleep directly affects the physical development, emotional state, behavior and mood of the baby. Therefore, it is important to ensure healthy and adequate sleep for your baby both at night and during the day. Let's find out how to improve a child's sleep and how much sleep a baby should sleep.
Avoiding daytime naps
Forcibly putting a child to bed who does not want to sleep during the day will lead to nothing but stress for both parties. To begin with, try to fill the first half of the day with active, outdoor games and sports activities - a tired baby will fall asleep before his head touches the pillow.
But if this doesn’t help, then it’s time to reconsider your daily routine. For six-year-old children, an hour's rest is enough. Seven-year-olds even manage without naps during the day. If the child has stopped sleeping during the day and does not experience any discomfort from this, then it is enough for parents to set aside time after lunch, during which the baby could simply lie down in a calm environment. Such a quiet “sleepless” rest also helps to restore strength and strengthen the nervous system.
Features of a newborn's sleep
Up to three months, a child’s life consists mainly of three alternating elements: food-sleep-hygiene. Their order may vary. Some children prefer to stay awake after eating, and when they wake up, they immediately want to eat, others, on the contrary, fall asleep immediately after eating, and after sleeping, they are ready to play. At the same time, the time spent awake gradually increases. There are such “rebels” who do not recognize any routine and wake up much more often than their parents would like. At the same time, the child does not care at all whether it is day or night. He woke up, which means he needs attention.
It would be a mistake to immediately pick up the child in your arms, trying to calm him down. At the same time, leaving the child to “scream”, as some parents and teachers advise, is also not right. Yes, after screaming, the child will, of course, fall asleep. But what kind of dream is this? Take a closer look at the baby: he continues to sob, shudder, and worry for a long time. This attitude will not make the child calmer, although he may cry less, having become convinced that it is useless. But this may be the first sign of alienation between the child and parents. It is not for nothing that psychologists say that the roots of many problems of adults lie in their early childhood, of which not even memories have been preserved.
What to do if your baby has trouble falling asleep or often wakes up during the day?
How to organize your child's sleep
How much children sleep depends on their parents. Newborns' sleep at night can be made longer by introducing an approximate sleep schedule from 2-3 months. Gradually, babies get used to the routine and quickly switch to nighttime rest. To introduce the regime, parents do the following:
- They try to keep the same time every day when they put the baby to bed for the day.
- The period of wakefulness before bedtime is slightly extended to tire out the baby.
- To ensure that the baby sleeps soundly at night, they bathe him, feed him, communicate with him, and sometimes take him for a walk. All these actions are important for infants to sleep.
Attention! You should not delay the period of wakefulness, otherwise the baby will be capricious and make it more difficult to fall asleep.
Starting from six months, children better grasp the daily routine - this is the ideal time to introduce a clearer routine. During this period, many parents try to accustom their baby to the following procedures:
- In the morning, his mother washes him.
- In the evenings he bathes in the bath.
- All procedures are accompanied by repeated words and songs so that the reaction to familiar actions is triggered.
The child begins to be accustomed to the regime from six months
Why does sleep become bad?
Healthy sleep can help a child in the first months of life with adaptation to the world around him.
During the first months, the baby gradually adapts to his new world. Sleep helps a lot with this. If he does not sleep as much as he should sleep at this age, then there are some reasons for this:
- If a child sleeps very little during the day, only a few hours at a time, and constantly wakes up, then he will get tired and by the evening sleep will be capricious and whiny .
- The main component of good sleep is the creation of favorable conditions . Wet diapers or clothes, cold in the room, extraneous noise - all this affects a sound and restful sleep.
- Before putting your child to sleep, ventilate the room well .
- Be sure to take your baby out for a walk in the fresh air during the day , and it is better to do this a few hours before bedtime.
Be sure to consult a doctor if your child has restless sleep!
Another reason why a child may not sleep well is colic in the tummy. If necessary, you can visit your pediatrician to help identify the cause of poor sleep.
Deep sleep phase in a newborn
Duration of sleep phases in a newborn baby.
Parents must understand that no matter how soundly and sweetly their child sleeps, his deep sleep phase may after a while be replaced by a restless one, at which point even your sneeze can wake him up. To ensure that your sleep is not interrupted, you need to follow several recommendations:
- Silence - remove all singing and talking objects away.
- At night it should be dark, or use a night light.
- During the day, you can cover the windows with curtains.
From the moment the baby is born until one year, the duration of his sleep can constantly change and, of course, there is no need to be alarmed.
All the times given above are averages, because everyone is individual, and it is simply impossible to put them to bed at the same time.
Sleep phases in infants
An adult's sleep contains about 6 phases. When children are not yet a year old, they have only two phases:
- Deep. Children during this period are relaxed, the body is resting right now.
- Surface. The baby continues to rest, but this is accompanied by body movements: he may open his mouth, open his eyes, change his facial expression. During this period, children are easy to wake up; they themselves often wake up from their own touch of a hand or a start.
After a year, children have more phases
Impact of phases
Most of a child’s dream is occupied by the deep phase (60%), the rest is superficial. During the entire rest period, these phases alternately replace each other every 20-30 minutes. In children under six months, the phase change cycle is about 50-60 minutes: 30/40 minutes deep sleep and 20 minutes shallow sleep. Up to a year, this cycle increases to 70 minutes.
After a year, children will gradually add other phases. In order not to disturb them, parents maintain silence and switch to dim lighting (draw the curtains, turn on the night light).
If your baby confuses day with night
For healthy development, the baby sleeps the prescribed number of hours at night and during the day, but it happens that he seems to confuse the time of day. The reasons why this happens can be different:
- Difficulties with night sleep occur when the child has poor and restless daytime sleep - often wakes up. He does not have time to rest, becomes overexcited and sleeps more restlessly at night.
- A good rest for children is possible in comfortable conditions. If the baby has wet diapers, clothes that are too hot, or dry air in the room - all this can affect anxiety. This shifts the night's rest hours.
- Lack of fresh air can make it difficult to sleep. Before going to bed, try to ventilate the room.
- A walk outside tires the baby in a timely manner and helps him fall asleep more soundly. In winter, frost promotes deep sleep; in summer, children get tired of the heat faster.
- The cause of anxiety may lie in abdominal pain.
To ensure that the baby sleeps soundly at night, the mother anticipates possible discomfort
How to improve your sleep
In order for children to develop according to their age, they need rest. Parents can anticipate problems with falling asleep and sound sleep in advance.
Children often get used to sleeping with their mother and feel fear without her presence. Rest in a crib will be calmer. Here the baby feels comfortable. To organize a relaxing holiday, the mother tries to satisfy all the baby’s needs before bedtime.
When the baby is put to bed, the parents stay close and talk to him. He falls asleep more calmly when he feels the closeness of his parents. Parents can leave when they are sure that the baby is fast asleep and leave the door open. If he starts screaming and crying, they react immediately.
From birth to one year, children's sleep period changes smoothly every couple of months. Parents are guided by the time norm given above, but this is not a mandatory number of hours; it may differ for everyone. The gradual introduction of the regime allows you to transfer the child first to night rest, then evens out the daily regime.
Why does a child sleep poorly at night after one year?
Many mothers and fathers are interested in why a one-year-old child does not sleep well at night. One-year-old toddlers usually sleep 13-14 hours a day. This age is characterized by problems with poor night sleep, which are most often associated with the need for increased physical activity, which is not always so easy to satisfy.
If a child cries and sleeps poorly at 1.5-2 years old, this may be due to the fact that during this period his character and whims begin to “manifest”; he may refuse to fall asleep not because he does not want to sleep, but because to prove their independence and the right to “make decisions” themselves.
It is also important during this period not to support a “false” refusal of daytime sleep, which is caused by resistance to any action of the parents.
At 2-3 years old, it happens that a child sleeps poorly at night and often wakes up, even if he slept well before. The first reason is the age crisis, which is characterized by pronounced independence, negativism, and denial.
Children also begin to attend kindergarten, adaptation to which does not always go smoothly. Parents are required to understand, be patient, and demonstrate love during this difficult period of life for the child.
Why does a child sleep poorly at night at 3-6 years old? There may be several reasons. Typically, this age is characterized by a “lull”, but sleep problems can still arise. Most often they are associated with the fact that children are “moved” to a separate room or a large bed. If you have to wake up your baby in the morning to get him ready for kindergarten, you need to move his bedtime earlier in the night.
As you can see, there are many reasons why a child sleeps poorly at night and often wakes up; they can be different at each age. It's important for parents to watch for signs of fatigue so they can set a good bedtime schedule and make sure their baby gets enough sleep.
An indicator of a sufficient amount of sleep is a good mood during the day, normal activity, and curiosity. A well-rested baby strives to explore the world, learns something new, his development proceeds well, and he endures age-related crisis periods more easily.
Such a child has a stronger immune system, a good appetite, better health, and is emotionally stable. According to medical research, children who regularly do not get enough sleep often develop deviant behavior.
At any age, do not forget about the importance of daytime sleep. Children must have it before the age of 3, and it is advisable to keep it until the age of 7.
During daytime sleep, the baby rests both physically, emotionally, and intellectually. If your child refuses to sleep, let him just lie in bed. Such a “quiet hour” is also useful for the child’s body for general relaxation.
Why do children need naps during the day or how to put a child to sleep during the day?
For many mothers, this issue is truly a problem. And some are not at all upset when the child refuses to sleep during the day and simply stop putting him to bed. How do you understand at what age a child needs daytime sleep and whether he needs it at all?
In my opinion, children not only need naps, they need them. Almost all pediatricians, psychologists and neurologists say the same thing. Daytime sleep ensures proper mental and physical development.
I think many mothers have noticed how capricious a child becomes if he does not sleep during the day. This is exactly what happens here. Or, not falling asleep on time, the baby still falls asleep in the evening, giving mom a sleepless night.
- Daytime naps help babies cope with emotions and impressions received earlier. The children's nervous system is more susceptible to emotional overload.
- Daytime naps promote longer concentration. The baby becomes calm, can play independently for a long time and does not require increased attention.
- As I wrote above, daytime sleep has a beneficial effect on the mental and physical development of the baby and is a prevention of various neurological and psychological problems. Only during sleep is the functionality of nerve cells restored.
- Daytime naps help strengthen your immune system.
- Regular daytime sleep has a positive effect on the quality of learning. The child is more inclined to accept new knowledge. The reaction to failures in a child who has slept during the day is less tragic. This research is very well written in the book “Myths of Parenting.”
- According to scientists, children who sleep during the day have a positive attitude and adapt faster to an unfamiliar situation (according to the results of a University of Colorado study conducted by Monica LeBourgeois), which means they have better socialization in new groups (for example, in kindergarten, development centers, sports sections and schools).
- Growth hormone is produced during sleep. I don’t think it’s worth specifying how important this is.
- Regular napping during the day promotes sound sleep at night. Often, without sleeping during the day, children cannot sleep peacefully in the evening due to nervous overexcitation. Therefore, you should not hope that without a daytime nap the child will get more tired and fall asleep faster in the evening.
Children do not want to sleep during the day for completely different reasons. Perhaps the child is simply not tired physically and emotionally or cannot fall asleep on his own. Or the room is very hot and stuffy (this happens to many people when the heating season begins). Or perhaps the mother simply does not have time to put the child to bed, so napping during the day cannot become a regular habit.
So, let's figure out what to do if the baby refuses to sleep during the day:
- The key to a good daytime sleep is a routine. No matter how scary it may be for mothers, a routine for a child is a must. Children quickly get used to it and are ready to eat/walk/sleep at the appointed time. If your baby doesn't want to fall asleep during the day, reconsider his daily routine. Perhaps the child wakes up late because he goes to bed late, so he’s simply not tired yet for nap time. Make morning walks regular (this is useful not only for the baby, but also for the mother). Put your child to bed immediately after lunch. Thus, you will create certain rituals, by performing which, the child will more calmly agree to a daytime nap. The main thing is to always follow the established regime.
- Monitor the temperature in the room. Air it out before going to bed. Children sleep very poorly when the room is hot and stuffy. Also, such a microclimate has a very bad effect on the nasal mucosa, which negatively affects the child’s susceptibility to viruses and bacteria.
- Never use naps as a punishment. On the contrary, tell your child why they need to sleep during the day, what happens in the body when they sleep.
- Go to bed with your child. It happens that in the evening children fall asleep on their own, but during the day they are completely unable to fall asleep on their own. This is exactly the situation at our house. Therefore, during the day I always go to bed with them, and the three of us fall asleep. This way, the children fall asleep peacefully, and I manage to get some rest.
- Putting a child to bed takes from 30 minutes to 1 hour. Daytime sleep requires patience not only from the child, but also from the mother. Don't stop going to bed if your baby hasn't fallen asleep after 15 minutes. At different ages, children need different times to fall asleep.
Why does an infant have trouble sleeping at night?
These disorders include difficulty falling asleep, intermittent, fragmented sleep (with awakenings), early waking up, and terrible and nightmare dreams. In most cases, they indicate the presence of neurosis in the child and the need to improve the psychological climate in the family.
The question of why a child sleeps poorly at night and often wakes up worries parents, regardless of their child’s age, because sound, restful sleep is equally important for both a primary school child and an infant. It is worth taking note of the fact that if a child does not get enough sleep more than 3 times a week, a visit to the pediatrician is necessary.
Sleep disturbance in infants occurs if the stomach, headache, or there are problems with the health of internal organs and the nervous system. Children do not sleep well when they experience physical discomfort. Sometimes a runny nose, sore throat, or cough prevent you from falling asleep.
Causes of sleep disturbances in children include anxiety. Childhood experiences are often associated with the psychological situation in the family. When parents quarrel, the child feels their emotions and at the same time worries and experiences emotional discomfort. These experiences persist during sleep. The tension experienced does not go away, the baby is not able to relax and fall asleep.
Sometimes a child sleeps poorly during periods associated with significant changes for him. This may include the baby’s separation from the breast, the start of attending kindergarten, school, the appearance of a brother or sister, a pet, or an incorrect daily routine.
During these periods, the mother’s contact with the child and her attention to him become especially important. At these moments, sleep problems are usually short-term; they disappear without a trace as the baby adapts to other circumstances and with sufficient parental support. He becomes calm again, and his sleep mode is restored.
Sometimes a child’s sleep disturbance at night occurs due to fear of the dark, nightmares, and increased child excitability. In this case, leave the night light on at night and stay close to your baby until he falls asleep completely. He needs confidence in security, in the closeness of mom and dad.
It happens that a child does not sleep well at night if he has been exposed to overload during the daytime, or if he is characterized by increased emotionality and mood instability.
If the disorders persist for a long time, the child’s body becomes exhausted, both nervous and physical. The baby looks tired, lethargic, exhausted, night sleep does not bring complete rest. Overwork develops, which, in turn, is often the cause of many diseases.
If your baby cannot sleep for a long time, often wakes up and cries in his sleep, walks at night, and experiences increased sleepiness during the day, find out what is bothering him. If the reason why a child is sleeping poorly is identified, it is easier to restore sleep.