Why ex-men often come back after a breakup

There are many reasons for separation. Some of them are obvious both to separating partners and to the people around them. Some of it lies deep and is understandable only after a thorough analysis of the collapsed relationship. But no matter what prompted the breakup, a woman needs to know how to properly break up with a man in order to maintain mental balance, calm and nerves for both.

Why do people break up?

Typically, a couple decides to separate due to:

• differences in interests (the artist and the financial director are attractive to each other at the beginning of the relationship, but then the creative person wants bright impressions around the clock, and the financier, who is accustomed to numbers, facts, and accuracy, is irritated by the immaturity and superficiality of his other half);
• differences in life principles (when one partner believes that life is full in the presence of a legal spouse and children, and the other believes that the meaning and values ​​of life are traveling around the world lightly, without children and obligations, they will not have strong relationships);
• differences in the level of development (a highly educated partner will initially enjoy the fact that he manages to open the world to his other half, while a less educated partner will be interested, but sooner or later the first one will get bored of acting all the time as an educator and will want to communicate “on an equal footing”, while the second one will find it insulting the status of an eternal student);
• long absence of one of the partners, frequent and long business trips (love at a distance is not possible for everyone, this is due to the characteristics of the person’s psyche, and not at all his desire to “tie” his soulmate to himself);
• differences in income levels (this is especially critical for couples in which the woman is more wealthy; the man cannot match her standard of living and feels discomfort because of this; relationships often deteriorate even when the man is more wealthy, because he tries to “buy” obedience , submission, adoration of a woman for money or expensive gifts);
• annoying habits (we're not even talking about smoking or regular drinking, but about small everyday habits - drinking juice from a carton, washing your hands in the kitchen, collecting cat figurines, playing music in the morning, walking around the house in your underwear);
• unkempt appearance (if at the beginning of a relationship partners could feel attracted to each other even after hours of climbing into the mountains, during which both were sweaty and dirty, then daily demonstrated uncleanliness extinguishes sexual desire; the same applies to sloppy hairstyles, unkempt skin, worn out, stale clothes );
• rejection of a new partner by a child or rejection of a child by a partner (often single or divorced parents, especially mothers, who want to arrange their personal lives, ignore the fact that heightened tensions are established between their chosen one and the child; such ignorance often leads to family tragedies associated with mental, physical and/or sexual violence);
• inability to accept a partner’s injury or illness (serious illnesses - cancer, diabetes, stroke, and injuries received in road accidents, at work, in sports, worsen the quality of life of the patient himself and complicate the life of those around her; not everyone can accept a partner in illness is as good as in health);
• betrayal (most often it is very difficult to survive the pain of resentment and the feeling of betrayal, so the one who was cheated on leaves and tries to forget the betrayed partner);
• assault (here everything is clear and unambiguous - if a man raises his hand against a woman, she has only two options: prepare to endure beatings regularly or leave him, despite flowery requests to forgive and vows that this will never happen again);
• grumpiness (usually this is a quality of female nature - nag, reproach, reproach, demand, compare with men who are more “promising” from her point of view; grumpiness leads to the fact that the very memory of a woman is poisoned by her destructive behavior).

Reasons for leaving

In fact, there are many reasons why a guy can leave and leave a girl. In some cases, the girl herself is to blame, sometimes this happens on the initiative of the guy. So, the reasons that prompt a man to end a relationship lie in the following:

• Bored with everyday relationships.
• The guy found someone else.
• He no longer likes his companion and his passion has faded.
• The man realized that it was love.
• A man cannot support such a woman.
• The man realized that he does not want to live a long life with you, you are not his person.
• Your partner is intimidated by your relatives or friends.

Many women, after a breakup, begin to blame themselves for the fact that they behaved incorrectly. But you shouldn’t blame only yourself for a breakup; most often, both partners are to blame for this.

How to decide to break up a relationship?

First you need to understand yourself. Is the desire to end the relationship really true, and not caused by a momentary resentment, random dissatisfaction, the desire to take revenge for something, has not taken the form of a threat. It happens that accumulated negativity provokes a desire to break up with a man, but the negativity has nothing to do with him; it is likely that the woman is dissatisfied with her job, relationships with parents or children, neighbors, old car, uncomfortable apartment. Then it is necessary to solve exactly the problem that led to the accumulation of negative emotions and impressions.

Afterwards, you need to decide whether there is a way out of this situation other than breaking up with a man? Perhaps you need a simple time-out, because a short separation will allow you to calm down, understand the truth of your feelings, the depth of the crack that has arisen in the relationship. Sometimes, after a temporary pause, a man and a woman return to each other renewed and rested, ready to improve their relationship. But it also happens that it is during a short separation that a woman and a man understand that nothing connects them anymore. Such time-outs are very useful for partners who are entangled in mutual claims and allow you to cut the Gordian knot of interpersonal problems as painlessly as possible.

If there is no way out of the situation and separation is the only possible way out, then you need to put an end to it for yourself. This means that you don’t need to keep a photo of your ex-lover in your makeup bag, wishing him good night, calling for any reason, setting up supposedly chance meetings, visiting his pages on social networks. Leaving go.

Finally, you need to inform the man about your decision. It is better and more honest to do this in person. If a woman is afraid of not being able to cope with her emotions, then it is acceptable to communicate the decision to break up by phone or in a letter. It is very unethical to send an SMS message like “we are breaking up” or “I am leaving you” or transmit it through an intermediary. Moreover, it is unacceptable to collect a man’s belongings (if the partners live together) and put them outside the door without explanation. This option is suitable for extreme cases, when a man clearly demonstrates deviant behavior and poses a threat to the woman, her children, and other members of the family.

Why do men come back?

Life is a complicated thing, and situations in it can be different. And when a man returns after breaking up, the woman begins to rack her brains over questions: why did he come back? Is it worth it or not to accept him into the family?

The following will describe common reasons why a man returns to his family:

• Having lived alone, a man understands that it’s hard for him without his woman, and therefore, after weighing the pros and cons, he finally decides to return the whole relationship.
• If a man left you only because of boredom, when he starts dating his mistress, he begins to compare the two women. And when he realizes that the one he left is better, he leaves his mistress and returns to his beloved and unique one.
• If, after a breakup, a man finds out that his ex has someone, then he will want to return to her and win the lady’s favor, because he understands what kind of woman he missed.
• Men may return out of curiosity to see how their former partner lives. Usually such relationships do not last long.
• There are rare, but still possible, cases when a man realizes that he has made a mistake and wants to return all the previous relationships and correct the mistakes.
• If a man loves you very much, then after breaking up he will want to return to you, and he simply cannot imagine life without you.

Every woman must decide whether to accept her former life partner or not. You need to understand what kind of relationship will exist between you after the breakup. In general, everything depends on the specific situation and the behavior of the partners in it. The reason for the separation of lovers must also be taken into account.

How to end a relationship with a man?

1. Under no circumstances should you blame yourself for the breakup that took place. This leads to depression and illness.
2. You need to accept that it's over with this partner, but always remember that with others it hasn't even begun yet.
3. You cannot choose a humiliating way to break up with a man: evict him with the help of friends or law enforcement agencies, inform his children, parents, subordinates or managers about the separation, demonstratively throw away his things.
4. Never and under no circumstances should a woman justify her departure from a man by the presence of a physical disability, the presence of health and / or mental characteristics of his parents or children, or sexual qualities.
5. It is unacceptable to use the fact of female infidelity as an argument like “go away, you are not a man, and in general I am cheating on you.”

A woman in all situations should remain a woman, and not a monster in heels.

Relationships after the return of a loved one

If you still accept back the man who left you, you need to prepare for the fact that your relationship may be somewhat different from the one that proceeded before the separation. But a woman must show her wisdom in order to avoid making previous mistakes.

Before accepting a loved one, you need to answer the following questions:

1. Do you really love your partner?
2. Are you confusing pity with love?
3. You definitely need the person who once abandoned you.
4. Are you ready to change yourself and learn to seek compromises?
5. Are you confident in your partner?

It must be taken into account that for a good relationship you need to work on yourself and change so that the man does not have the desire to leave you again.

To make your relationship perfect, you need to adhere to the following tips:

• There is no need to complain about your problems so as not to become boring for your partner.
• There is no need to argue with your partners often and irritate them.
• You need to be restrained and learn to remain silent at the right moments.
• You need to be sexy and satisfy your partner so that he feels good next to you.

First of all, a woman must love and respect her partner, only in this way the union will be long and strong.

There are also situations when a man leaves forever, but you should not worry about this. You need to be glad that fate took you away from such a person and look forward to meeting a partner worthy of you.

There is no need to get hung up on one person, maybe he is not as good as you think. You need to reconsider your attitude towards your partner and understand that he is simply not worthy of you.

Men are truly unpredictable creatures, although they themselves often complain about women’s logic and call the weaker sex fickle and contradictory. Meanwhile, cases when a man leaves his beloved with a promise to never come again, and then returns and asks to accept him, are not uncommon. And women who don’t understand anything are racking their brains over the question: “why do men come back after a breakup” - the psychology of their behavior is largely explained by male nature.

Women, breaking up with a man, as a rule, do not look for a way back. The psychology of men is structured differently. He is not worried about how he will be perceived, and what his “wandering” from one woman to another will look like. He simply does what he thinks is necessary. First he leaves under the influence of new feelings or negative emotions. And then he returns, just as confident that he is right.

Why men come back after a breakup: behavioral psychology

Psychology offers three main options for male behavior that explain why men return after a breakup:

• they love comfort - living for a long time with their spouse, they forget that living without a woman is bad. Even if they go to their mistress, then with a high degree of probability she will not be able to please the man the way his wife did. And if a man goes nowhere, simply because he is fed up with everyday life and bored with family life, then he is surprised to discover that breakfast by itself does not appear on the table in the morning, and ironed shirts do not jump onto the closet hanger;
• owners - the news that the abandoned woman is not bored alone, but is having a pleasant time in the company of another man, is a heavy blow to male pride. The jealous person returns to his ex to upset her happiness, and then somehow, unnoticed by himself, remains with her again;
• compared in favor of the ex - often a man’s new love disappoints him. When the passion goes away, the understanding returns that the ex-wife or life partner coped with the responsibilities assigned to her much better, guessed desires more often, cooked tastier, and demanded less. And only after parting does a man realize how good it was for him before.

Video: How to behave if your ex decides to return

There are very few infallible truths. Sometimes even folk wisdom is wrong, and a glued cup serves faithfully for many years. Sometimes our wildest expectations are deceived, and the newly built relationship collapses miserably on the heads of the reunited couple. In any case, where feelings are involved, some risk cannot be avoided. Weigh it, think it over, make a decision. And may it turn out to be the most correct one.

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• Every individual has experienced the fear of loneliness at least once in their life. Many people understand.
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Reasons that prompt a man to return to a past relationship

It's actually quite simple. Let's look at the most common reasons:

It’s just that during his dates with his mistress, he saw a different woman than she turned out to be in everyday life. He was captivated by the thrill of secret meetings and the novelty of impressions. And, when the flair of the “undercover” relationship passed and all the cards were revealed, the man was visited by a feeling of regret about the family that he had destroyed. And the desire to return to an established life and your former life.

1. Infantile psychotype of a man. Everything is clear here. There is a type of man who doesn’t really think about his actions and their consequences. It’s like in the song: “Forever young, forever drunk.” And it absolutely does not matter how old this man is, or his social status. Such people are selfish and do what is convenient for them at the moment. So he wanted a bachelor’s life - that’s it, forgive me, goodbye. And if you want comfort and borscht, you easily return back, without any twinges of conscience.

Usually an infantile man considers his return a holiday for his ex-woman. And he is indignant when he is not accepted back. But don't worry, this resentment doesn't last long either.

1. A feeling of unfinished action. This option occurs when there is some unsaidness between the partners. If the breakup occurred due to a quarrel or some external reasons, then after a while the man wants to return to this relationship and see if it could have been different.

Also, a feeling of unfinished action occurs when a woman herself initiates a breakup without explaining the reasons. Then her ex-partner will mentally return to this situation from time to time and try to find an explanation for it. And a determined man will try to restore the relationship in order to correct some of his mistakes.

Every man has a desire to return to a past relationship for his own personal reasons. Someone realizes their mistakes and wants to correct them. Some are drawn back by the force of habit, the desire to return to an established way of life. Someone gives in to their selfish impulses without realizing why they need it. But it’s up to the woman to restore the relationship, to awaken past feelings or not.

The man returned after a breakup: how to move on

The psychology of a man indicates that, having decided to leave, he begins to treat the woman he himself abandoned differently, as a rule, better. He looks for meetings, becomes more attentive and courteous.

A new period of courtship begins, which each girl perceives differently. Many people note that after a breakup, relationships improve. But does this mean that you should take the man back?

If you want to improve your relationship with your husband, you need to follow simple rules:

• do not remember - since you have already accepted the man back, then it is not worth reminding, much less reproaching, the man for what he did. Let the temporary separation be a lesson for both, from which both should draw appropriate conclusions;
• develop new areas of communication - since it so happened that the man left, it means that not everything was smooth in the relationship. Perhaps something was missing, or everyone was fixated on themselves, not noticing what was going on in the soul of their partner. You should analyze your previous relationships and understand what was missing in them. To do this, you need to talk more, and not only about intra-family topics. New areas of communication will help diversify family life;
• don’t get hung up on a man - as you know, forewarned is forearmed. A man who leaves once can leave again. You don’t have to think about it or be afraid of another breakup, just find yourself new hobbies that will help you not get hung up on a man and will become a way for you to realize yourself in other areas of your life.

Why do men come back after a breakup? It often happens that a girl already has a new life, a relationship, another guy. And suddenly, unexpectedly, a young man with whom the relationship has long been a thing of the past makes himself known.

Or this option. The man himself decided to stop communicating. He said that you were not a couple, packed his things and left. And after a while he returned as if nothing had happened. Even when the breakup is initiated by a girl, in seventy cases out of a hundred she will receive an offer from her ex-boyfriend to start over. Why is this happening? Is this some kind of feature of male psychology?